Your anti-partner

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A massive ego
Acting as if they're better then everyone else
Judgemental
Pessimistic
Lazy In Bed
Clingy
Not allowing me to have any time for my mates or have female friends
Expecting everything her own way
Money orientated

I had a blind date with my antipartner once when I was 20 years old. His name was Buck. Really, it was on his birth certificate, Buck. (I also knew a guy who was actually NAMED Junior too, but that's neither here nor there, except they knew each other). Anyway, he worked at the gas station near my house and was really pretty hot. I had never really spoken to him, but had kinda lusted after him for a while. My best friend knew him and she set us up on a date. We had talked on the phone and he was pretty nice, and he said we would go out to a club and to dinner. OK, so the night of the date came around and I had on some pastel pants, a nice shirt and a pastel jacket. It was the 80s so this was in style. He shows up, in his Charger and blows the horn. Doesn't get out of the car. So, I let that go and go out there. He has on his uniform still. I'm thinking maybe that's why he didn't come to the door, he needs to go by his house to change. He also has a friend with him and I figured he would be dropping him off. I get in the car and as we get on the freeway I find out I'm wrong. He's going dresses in his greasy gas station uniform, and his friend is coming too. Well, he's hot so I cut him some more slack. We drive over to the bad part of town where I grew up. Our club is the VFW. We go in and he buys me a Milwaukees best in the can and one for himself and proceeds to play pool. Then his ex gf shows up, and she has born to love tattooed on the knuckles of one hand and born to kill tattoed on the knuckles of the other hand. And up until this point I thought that had just been some kind of cheesy stereotype but nope. It happens. They play pool and I sip on that one beer. Buck and his friend get falling down drunk and so I drive home. Disgusted. But no wait! We forgot the DINNER! Go through the drive through at Burger King he says, and I do. I order, for me and them. Then he's broke when we get to the window. So I pay. He's almost out of gas so I stop and bought gas too because I do NOT want him stuck at my house! We get back to my house and his drunk a** tries to kiss me goodnight. Oh no! Not gonna happen! I get my burger and go in my house and slam the door as he leaves. I never saw him again but I called my friend who set us up on the phone and we talked about it for several hours.

Some things hot just wont compensate for. That date was one of them.

PaganMom

^does it work in the other direction? Can a guy who is pretty much the definition of fugly get somewhere if he doesn't act like a jackass like that (and, presumably, makes some attempt at hygiene)?

someone completely devoted to some irrational idea- like religion, neo-nazism, marxism etc
someone with no sense of humour
someone with no opinions of their own, who agrees with everything just to avoid conflict
someone emotionally demanding

Quoted for truth. Sums up my opinion too.

someone who lacks passion
does not appreciate nature or even worse doesnt want to be a part of it everyday
needs to be around me all the time
someone with no desire to create or be a part of something bigger then themselves
doesnt except me for who I am
someone who doesnt make attempts to participate in things that bring me joy and the opposite of that, makes no attempts to include
me in things that bring him joy
someone who draws attention in public (makes me cringe)
bad in bed or doesnt enjoy sex

I sure there are more, but I cant think of any so these must be the most important

I think it depends on what you mean by fugly. I've met a couple of guys who were quirky looking that a lot of other girls didn't like but I thought were cute in a wierd kinda way. Now there are some guys who are just as nice as can be, that I have met, but who were just downright awful looking, and there would be no way in the world I could have ever gone out with them. Just like I'm sure there are girls that there is no way you could ever bring yourself to go out with. Everybody has their own definition of fugly, and their own line they just can't cross. Then again, what I might think is hot, somebody else might think is Godawful ugly. And vice versa. So, each person has their own idea of what is and isn't hot and what is and isn't fugly. Mine may not be your's, and your's may not be mine.

PaganMom

I seriously lol'd. I don't know how, but you managed to describe my boyfriend in one sentence. I'm scared.

my nightmare partner would follow football, x factor and be slow and apathetic.

How does 120 lbs overweight sound to you? Keep in mind, other than the weight, there isn't anything else in the way of physical deformities or other maladies (except for something like 2 small moles on the back of my neck), and as far as I know, nobody has ever commented on my face as being ugly (although you never know). In fact, my face might be the one saving grace I have, as the one positive comment I've ever gotten about my looks usually reference my eyes.

Hmmm...
- Someonw who is overly needy
- Someone who is insecure and runs/hides from herself (afraid to be herself)
- Someone who is either completely intransegent (sp?) or a complete pushover
- Someone who is clingy/cannot give me my space
- Someone who is a staunch nihilist/pessimist (Existentialists are cool... could probably get along with a positive nihilist, a la Gianni Vattimo... although it could make for some interesting debates)
- Someone who is not independent
- Someone who is trendy
- Someone who doesn't value Nature
- Someone tries to change me
- Someone who is a Junkie/Crack-head
- Someone who is not enthralled with the mystery of life/existence
- Someone who has no passion
- Someone who is overly domesticated
- Someone who lacks a spirit of adventure
- Someone who lacks the will to create/is uninspired
- Someone who is a social maniac/insisting on dragging me to all sorts of social functions
- Someone who is completely a-spiritual
- Someone who is asexual
- Some one who wants it exactly the same (bland) way everytime... Unwilling to be playful or experiment (see previous bullet for context)
- Someone who doesn't take life seriously
- Someone who cannot laugh at herself
- Someone who is passive-agressive/won't be upfront about grievances.

I must say... That's pretty much an exhaustive list of things that have strained relationships/friendships over the years.

lol satire.

Right?

I think it would depend on how you carry the weight. I dated a guy that was really overweight before. He dressed well and actually looked more like a successful banker than a fat young adult. He grew up to become a successful banker. Married the sister of a guy I dated too. He was just boring though. No fun really.

It sounds to me like you are using the weight as a defense, so that you don't have to go out and try to find somebody. Saying 'Oh well, I'm overweight so nobody will want me" keeps you from having to try and take a chance on failing, which we all do from time to time. Even the hottest guy out there gets shot down from time to time.

No, you won't get instant results as soon as you lost the weight, but you will have more confidence so that you can meet and date. Working out is also addictive and releases endorphins so you get a hobby as well as self improvement. Why not find a good lifting gym and start working out? Then as you lose the weight you can start building too and within a year you can have a really killer body and I guarantee that will attract some women. Might not be the ones you want, but it's a start. Once you get the confidence then you can approach the ones you do want. You gotta start somewhere. It's up to you if you want to or not, but I sure would. I had to do a lot of work on me before I was able to attract guys way back when and I didn't instantly attract them, but it worked. Eventually. So you can either do the work and take the chance to try for the happiness you want or you can sit there and have something to blame that you create yourself. It's up to you.

PaganMom

The girl of my nightmares would...

Not know what shes fighting for

and like a lot of ones that have been described

to sum them up in a term Emotional Gaslighting. (look it up)

My laundry list...

Jealous, controlling, hot headed, moody, abusive.

Addicted to watching sports....the loud, entitled frat boy type you see in beer commercials.

Fundie Christian intolerant of other's beliefs and lifestyles.

Someone who can never talk about serious things and is only comfortable living at a superficial level.

I think I know what you mean by Emotional Gaslighting. I've seen the movie. A Mind F#@cker, in other words?