makuranososhi wrote:
ToadOfSteel wrote:
I was on Prozac for 2 years (the dosage was being adjusted throughout, but eventually settled on 10 mg), and yet still the happiness felt artificial...
...and Prozac is one for a multitude of different medications, all of which have slightly different effects and working mechanisms upon brain chemistry. Instead of 24 months of tinkering with one, your doctor should have evaluated whether a different medication would have been more effective.
The drug did what they wanted... it calmed me down, shut me up, and gradually eliminated my impulsive behavior (although that could have just been me maturing too). But you'll notice it's what
they wanted. I still felt like a fake. I know it sounds harsh on the therapists and psychologists i had to work with over there, but to be fair to them, they were probably under orders from my school to turn the "problem child" (me) into something they could handle (I first got put on prozac for beating up a guy that was trying to bully me in school). They were at least generous enough to not immediately write me off and prescribe ritalin, and at least give me a chance to work on my impulse problem myself (which I took).
therange wrote:
10 mg is nothing btw. I'm on 60mg of prozac and I wouldn't have it any other way. I don't like feeling bad.
If 60 mg works for you, that's great. 10 mg was too much
for me. I don't like feeling fake. I'd rather feel bad and feel like I'm myself than feel good, but fake. Granted, ideally I'd like to feel good
and be myself, but if I can only choose one, I'll keep being myself. There's a true solace to be found in being yourself, unmitigated by any mind-altering substances, and that solace keeps me going even in the really bad times. That might be what you're misinterpreting as "enjoying being miserable"...