Never had a boyfriend and why?

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Vyn
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04 Mar 2010, 1:13 pm

zeldapsychology wrote:
Yes only 5ft. tall I HATE being Petite!! !! I wish I was tall like my grandfather!! ! My nephew's side of the family is tall so he'll be taller than me!! !! ! It's funny the guys hitting on me it's odd and silly. :-) and yes it has made me feel better. :-) It's sad some are into there 30's and haven't experienced a boyfriend yet. Glad I'm not alone. :-) If at all possible (no offense guys on WP) I'd HOPE for it to be natural as in not online. You meet a guy in school/work become friends then start dating etc. Although IMO you can talk about your interest etc. all day long online I wouldn't really KNOW you so if possible I'd like to do it naturally.


Eh, being short has it's advantages. Like never having to worry about fitting somewhere or banging your head something low hanging.

Odd and silly? I can see it being odd from your point of view, not sure about silly though. Glad it helped however. A "natural" meeting can actually be more misleading than an online one. You tend to see someone as they are online because you judge them by what they say and do vs how they appear and what you see. The downside being that online you don't see them lol.


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04 Mar 2010, 3:56 pm

Vyn wrote:
musicboxforever wrote:
Plus my mother and a couple have other people have told me that men don't like intelligent women.


I'll state for the record right now that I dislike stupid women just as much as I dislike stupid men. And I find intelligence in women extremely attractive. In point of fact, it's the number one trait I look for.


Quite right too. One thing I value with my friends is someone who can at least hold an intelligent discussion.



musicboxforever
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05 Mar 2010, 8:09 am

Thanks guys. Glad my mother is wrong. The thing is though, my little sister has a higher IQ than me and has taken our mother's advice to heart and thinks that being intelligent is useless. She and her fiance were talking about a friend of his who has just finished his degree course at uni and can't find a job so has started his own cleaning business to keep himself busy in the meantime. They think he is a fool for spending so much money getting a degree for nothing. They actually said to me that in a perfect world people wouldn't be intellectuals. I pointed out that if there were not clever people, no one would have invented the mobile phone and neither of them would have a cell phone.

I feel like it is all an uphill struggle sometimes.

I have often wondered if my sister is aspie and masking it very well. She has some very non NT attitudes toward things and hates emotional expressions (although she is more huggy than me.) She has put on this exceptionally sweet persona and has got they guy. I liked him too, but he asked her out, not me, I was too stand-offish. He and his friends view me as the girl no one can have. I don't want to be put on a pedestal I just want to be accepted for who I am.



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05 Mar 2010, 10:03 am

there is a difference between intelligence and intellectual interest, don't get confused. while it is pleasant to have a wife who can earn a good salary from a high flying sociable job, the female Professor of Anthropology may not be the most attractive prospect. on the brigher side, guys who cannot appreciate your intelligence are shallow and you deserve better than that. :lol:



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05 Mar 2010, 11:40 am

musicboxforever wrote:
DavidM wrote:
You literally shouldn't have any difficulty getting a man if you want one, as a woman. All you need to do is giggle and sit pretty and men are expected to come on to you. Initially you have a lot of power over men but be careful, once you've picked one and start committing to him he gains the power over you. 8)


That's a sweet thing to say, but it's not that easy unfortuately. Some of us appear quite austere. I am very intelligent (even though I'm that sort of useless intelligent where I'm not really very practical) i think most guys want a lassie they can look after, and I don't really need looking after (it would appear). I don't know what I'm supposed to do to show that I need looking after. I need to work and pay my rent and do my own DIY because I live alone. I have too. It may seem that women have it easy, but for some of us the whole romance thing is an uphill struggle and I feel like just giving up on it. Plus my mother and a couple have other people have told me that men don't like intelligent women.


I would rather have an intelligent woman than one that is stupid. Because stupid people tick me off.


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Vyn
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05 Mar 2010, 2:14 pm

musicboxforever wrote:
Thanks guys. Glad my mother is wrong. The thing is though, my little sister has a higher IQ than me and has taken our mother's advice to heart and thinks that being intelligent is useless. She and her fiance were talking about a friend of his who has just finished his degree course at uni and can't find a job so has started his own cleaning business to keep himself busy in the meantime. They think he is a fool for spending so much money getting a degree for nothing. They actually said to me that in a perfect world people wouldn't be intellectuals. I pointed out that if there were not clever people, no one would have invented the mobile phone and neither of them would have a cell phone.

I feel like it is all an uphill struggle sometimes.


Wow, I hope you call your mother stupid then, because she definitely fits the bill. Anyone that thinks intelligence is useless needs to go back to living in a tree with no tools or clothes or language and still see if they think intelligence is bad. Absolutely insane....

Did you also remind them that it takes takes intelligence to talk? To have their cars? To have clothing? Or heated food? Or heat at all...

Ugh. This is why I laugh at the Darwin awards. I only wish more people could remove themselves from our gene pool by stupidity.


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05 Mar 2010, 7:54 pm

Well.....what sort of exsperiences would you like to have t other girls have time and time again? would you like to go out with loads of boys who will just break up with you for the even hotter girl? You have to understand that alot of girls seem to be doing well with boys when infact they are really just moving from boy to boy. but then again maybe im wrong i dont know how people react in those situations.....but a boyfreind :P aww thats nice to want one but what exactly do you WANT from him? :S if its just to feel loved then i dunno maybe its a good reason maybe not. i couldnt pick you up im as skinny as anything and 6 foot 1 :P anyways just PM me if you need any reassurence :) ill be glad to talk.


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05 Mar 2010, 10:13 pm

do I have to hit on her?
i don't want to lol



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20 May 2010, 6:59 am

Maybe you are a bit like me... I have only fallen in love with one guy, and I'm pretty blind to any others trying to date with me, and I only talk to guys wanting to be friends with me, not date.
I have even turned 2 guys down!!
Yes, it is a little sad I am fixated on this one boy, but then, I'm only seventeen, and life will hopefully move on.
I don't have much chance with him, cause every-time I offer him a pencil or whatever when he needs one, I go red. He thinks I'm weird, pretty sure.
So maybe you need to move on to different guys, rather than perfect image of a tall one, if you really want a boyfriend? I know I need to, but just can't at the mo!
Best of luck :D



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20 May 2010, 10:09 am

PLA wrote:
musicboxforever wrote:
DavidM wrote:
You literally shouldn't have any difficulty getting a man if you want one, as a woman. All you need to do is giggle and sit pretty and men are expected to come on to you. Initially you have a lot of power over men but be careful, once you've picked one and start committing to him he gains the power over you. 8)


That's a sweet thing to say, but it's not that easy unfortuately. Some of us appear quite austere. I am very intelligent (even though I'm that sort of useless intelligent where I'm not really very practical) i think most guys want a lassie they can look after, and I don't really need looking after (it would appear). I don't know what I'm supposed to do to show that I need looking after. I need to work and pay my rent and do my own DIY because I live alone. I have too. It may seem that women have it easy, but for some of us the whole romance thing is an uphill struggle and I feel like just giving up on it. Plus my mother and a couple have other people have told me that men don't like intelligent women.


I've only heard that on television and the internet. It seems to be a fiction.


Not always. I had a boyfriend break up with me because he didn't want a girl that was smarter than him. :roll: :ncool: And he was not very smart. Of course he didn't say this to my face, I was good friends with his sister and she told me. Fortunately for him, he's found a girl that suits his needs, lol...



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20 May 2010, 10:35 am

I'm 15 and I've never had a boyfriend, my friends say it's because I'm "too picky". This is kind of true, it's because I'm a romantic and I won't want to date someone unless I actually really like them, but most people I know just go out with literally anyone just so they can boast and look cool, and stuff. The whole teenage dating scene appears shallow and unappealing to me, I'm willing to wait for someone I like even if that would mean waiting until I'm older.


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20 May 2010, 11:03 am

gina-ghettoprincess wrote:
I'm 15 and I've never had a boyfriend, my friends say it's because I'm "too picky". This is kind of true, it's because I'm a romantic and I won't want to date someone unless I actually really like them, but most people I know just go out with literally anyone just so they can boast and look cool, and stuff. The whole teenage dating scene appears shallow and unappealing to me, I'm willing to wait for someone I like even if that would mean waiting until I'm older.


I agree with you. I had a friend who told me I needed to lower my standards so I could get dates more often. I have had three boyfriends, I don't regret any of them (in entirety anyway, lol) and I'm glad it's that way. She tried to make a list of all the boys she had dated and couldn't remember them all. Couldn't remember all the people she had kissed. Had trouble remembering everyone she had slept with. This is when we were only like 16, too. (I'm 19 now, she's 18.) I'm very glad to have had 3 people each being special to me in some way or learning a lesson from each relationship instead of just dating to say I did it.



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20 May 2010, 11:23 am

gina-ghettoprincess wrote:
I'm 15 and I've never had a boyfriend, my friends say it's because I'm "too picky". This is kind of true, it's because I'm a romantic and I won't want to date someone unless I actually really like them, but most people I know just go out with literally anyone just so they can boast and look cool, and stuff. The whole teenage dating scene appears shallow and unappealing to me, I'm willing to wait for someone I like even if that would mean waiting until I'm older.


That's very mature of you. I was not with anyone in high-school & a lot of my class mates wer dating & some wer having lots of problems with things. Looking back I'm really glad I was not interested in relationships at all then. I want to find one person to be with & make it work with em instead of going true partners like others are. You are much better off not dating in high-school because lots of guys are jerks especially then with their hormone changes & all.
It's not only teenagers who go ture partners thou. One of my few offline friends is 40 & he is constantly dating different women because they keep breaking up with him & he's having financial & other problems because he kept getting used. I'm his free counselor & if I told you guys some of his stuff; you mite decide you want to stay single for the rest of your life :roll: I don't think there's anything wrong with being picky as long as you know what you want. Some people say they want a person who's one way but 1ce they find someone like that; they don't like it. If you have realistic idea of what traits you would like; that's great. Some people tell me that I'm to picky but others tell me that I'm waaay to desperate & I need to have some different standards. People are confusing :? It's much better to figure out what's rite for you, ya know :) I know I'm lonely & stuff & I am kind of desperately seeking a woman but I do not want to get my heart broken by someone who's using me in a childish game either


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20 May 2010, 10:49 pm

astaut wrote:
PLA wrote:
musicboxforever wrote:
DavidM wrote:
Plus my mother and a couple have other people have told me that men don't like intelligent women.


I've only heard that on television and the internet. It seems to be a fiction.


Not always. I had a boyfriend break up with me because he didn't want a girl that was smarter than him. :roll: :ncool: And he was not very smart. Of course he didn't say this to my face, I was good friends with his sister and she told me. Fortunately for him, he's found a girl that suits his needs, lol...

Lol! I always wanted a girl I date to be about as smart as me. I wouldn't mind if she was smarter, even way smarter, as long as she didn't mind me not being as smart or make too much fun of me for it. xP

But there's too many different dimensions to intelligence to just call one person smarter than another a lot of the time, so I dunno. I mean, there's people skills, math skills, spacial logic skills, verbal skills, and so on, and people often have mixed levels of these. We Aspies are usually a good demonstration for a large part of the people skills not matching the other skills' levels, for one.

To get more back on the topic of the general thread though.... I dunno, maybe I'm weird, but I always liked girls who are taller than me. It's not like a prerequisite or anything, but I don't like being too much taller. >.> I'm ~5' 10/11".


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21 May 2010, 5:51 pm

zeldapsychology wrote:
I just thought this would be a fun topic to start. I myself am not sure why I've never had a boyfriend. I'll be 24 March 29th I've never dated,kissed a guy,hugged a guy etc. etc. I have yet to have those experiences that other females have had time and time again by now (break up make ups etc.) :-( 1 prerequisite is I want a tall guy that I can look up to (literally LOL!) and be able to pick me up LOL! I'm only 5ft. and 140lb. :-)


Do you want a guy who is taller than you or a Tall guy, because there's a big difference between the two. A 5'3 guy is taller than you and might be able to pick you up but he's still considered short when compared to the average male height.


A piece trolly advice from a wise funny troll : do not limit your chances by a 1 silly prerequisite. I mean c'mon, you're obviously wanting a bf and you already heading to 24 with no guy and zero experience, you really can't afford having any prerequisite....



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23 May 2010, 12:32 am

I am 6'7" and ~230 pounds and well proportioned. Would that be too tall for you?