i just want to be loved

Post Reply New Topic

People will take advantage of you any chance they get. If you are nice to everyone you'll get f'ed over in the end. You'll likely end up being a lot of people's best friends if you act "lovingly". Just take a look at NT guys, as*holes get married first. as*holes get everything they want actually.

Obviously not everyone is only out there to gratify ONLY themselves but it's safer to assume that they are than to go out and love everyone and show compassion, positive feelings and all that other lame bullsh*t. It's just a known fact that nobody can mess with you if you play things the hard way so to speak, where as when you go easy on everyone you're going to lose something in the process. Sanity, money, time, etc. You name it, it will disappear. If you want to be wise about it you would start being a complete as*hole and gradually work your way down to being "nice enough". If you have to you would move on at the first sign of trouble. Granted this isn't entirely possible if you have a shred of decency in you.

What is "love" really? It is an ephemeral set of chemical reactions that come in the form of societal expectations and illusions.

Love is also something costs far more thn what it is actually worth.

To live is to struggle. I am thankful that we have a free-market economy that supplies me with drinking water and food so that I don't have to labour every waking hour to secure them both; compared to them being loved is a doddle.

Kindness is a weakness. For the sake of survival the only need to be submissive or kind is when you aren't as tough as the guy who's about to try and kill you.

FYI I'm way too nice. I've been trying to remedy that since I was 12 but I still end up puking my guts out in front of a toilet because of other people, nothing about age is going to make me any nicer. I hate how nice I am. You give love to receive stress and pain.

I can tell you are making your statements from a place of suffering. I hope you find the path that leads to the healing of your desire to be what you aren't, and finds a good place for yourself as you are; kind, intelligent and clearly sensitive.

If you feel the need to explore unkindness, then by all means, do, but I didn't find any happiness there, and I don't think you will either. I recommend that you don't give up on kindness; refine your definition of what it it means. Find the people who appreciate love, don't squander your pearls on swine.

Toad, this isn't meant to be a perosnal attack, but you really need to start taking peoples advice here and move on. All you seem to do is like to complain and be moody, but I haven't seen anything on your part to improve yourself.

I have explored unkindness many times in the past. I was the one to blame when me and my 5th grade girlfriend broke up, I was laughing my ass off while my friend beat the crap out of a kid that called me gay too much when I was 12 (then I beat his ass up later that year), I hurt at least 4 friends feelings majorly in the last 4 years. I'm sure I've done plenty more wrong that is escaping my memory. I've told people to go to hell, go f*ck themselves, etc. Entire classrooms even. I do actually find happiness causing other people pain at times, I have to get in the mood for it which I could do on my own but I just wouldn't feel justified in doing so. I can watch an ex girlfriend cry with a big ass smile on my face, SWEET REVENGE! Hell I've even watched an ex cut and laughed at it. I am a jerk, and I'm not afraid to say it.

I'm actually not currently suffering from anything but being bored and broke. I'm glad my last relationship finally ended, cause now I don't have to put up with her sh*t. Healing however (if it happens) is going to take a long ass time or nothing short of a miracle. I'll take your analysis of me as a compliment.

Think what you want. It's a fact that kindness is for the weak, that's why dictatorships work at least until someone stronger comes along and kicks the dictator's country's ass. Might makes right.

Hey, maybe it's not nice but as long as they think it is that's all that matters. You think people are always being truly kind to you when your receive kindness from them? Are you ever sure that can't possibly have a motive behind it?