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And People give me crap about this....

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RICKY5
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19 Sep 2010, 7:27 pm

xxZeromancerlovexx wrote:
I'm the type of girl that says that image is very important in dating. Why would I date a guy who's going to embarass me with bad looks and bad personality. I need a guy who is what I call "Amazing inside and out".
I love guys who fit a certain degree in atractivness. I'm not too strict on what you have to look like but still you must be attractive in my book. I don't what to be made fun of for dating a guy that isn't attractive to most women. Just think of it like this would you rather be seen with a guy who is...
A.
-Scrawny
-Scraggly
-Doesn't know how to dress
Or
B.
-Has some but not too much muscle
-Is well groomed
-Dresses like a guy(Street clothes not what his mom picked out)

If you chose B, I think we are on the same page.

As for personality. I don't wanna be seen with a guy who doesn't know how to act. Manners matter in my case. Guys who are sexist douche bags aren't right for me. However a guy that is considerate, kind yet still acts like he has some clang-clangs, is what I'm looking for.

Does this make sense to anyone?


I do not blame you at all. You are simply desiring what you are wired to desire and being honest about it. I like that.

Women are wired to be more concerned about what their peers think because it was evolutionarily significant during the early years of humanity.

A lot of the aspie males who want a relationship don't seem to be able to grasp the concept that they need to be someone a girl would want to be seen with outside of community service.



zen_mistress
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19 Sep 2010, 10:21 pm

xxZeromancerlovexx wrote:
I'm the type of girl that says that image is very important in dating. Why would I date a guy who's going to embarass me with bad looks and bad personality. I need a guy who is what I call "Amazing inside and out".
I love guys who fit a certain degree in atractivness. I'm not too strict on what you have to look like but still you must be attractive in my book. I don't what to be made fun of for dating a guy that isn't attractive to most women. Just think of it like this would you rather be seen with a guy who is...
A.
-Scrawny
-Scraggly
-Doesn't know how to dress
Or
B.
-Has some but not too much muscle
-Is well groomed
-Dresses like a guy(Street clothes not what his mom picked out)

If you chose B, I think we are on the same page.

As for personality. I don't wanna be seen with a guy who doesn't know how to act. Manners matter in my case. Guys who are sexist douche bags aren't right for me. However a guy that is considerate, kind yet still acts like he has some clang-clangs, is what I'm looking for.

Does this make sense to anyone?


My boyfriend wears casual clothes, and just throws together random stuff he has without considering how he looks. He always looks good, I dont know how he does it...


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zen_mistress
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19 Sep 2010, 10:23 pm

RICKY5 wrote:

I do not blame you at all. You are simply desiring what you are wired to desire and being honest about it. I like that.

Women are wired to be more concerned about what their peers think because it was evolutionarily significant during the early years of humanity.

A lot of the aspie males who want a relationship don't seem to be able to grasp the concept that they need to be someone a girl would want to be seen with outside of community service.


To be honest, I dont really understand her post. Yes many women are wired to care what others think of them, but aspie women usually are not..

I dont really care what other people think of who is seen on my arm, it is what I think of them that i care about.


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Bethie
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20 Sep 2010, 1:20 am

Yeah, I couldn't care less how a man looks.

:)


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Othila
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23 Sep 2010, 5:17 pm

You have to take into account this person's age. At 17 you probably have the biggest pool of candidates availible in your lifetime. I dont think acknowledging this fact is ugly. At times I wished I was 17 not because physically I was better looking (although it certainly helped) but because everyone is on the same playing field. You get older and it is harder to find people single and that is just another fact of life so you tend to go with what you can tolerate versus picking out an ideal.

Lets not forget also the naivety of 17 :lol: which due to lack of experience makes one think they know what they want in a partner but later come to find out; that not what i want.

Frankly it's easy to say oh I dont care what my friends think but I have known many a teenage girl who was habitually harrassed for dating a loser. Sometimes you just get weared down by all that. I am glad I never experienced that but I tend not to talk about my relationships to other people so problem solved right there. :wink:



League_Girl
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23 Sep 2010, 5:33 pm

I find it interesting that the younger you are, the more you are given a pat in the back for ignorance or for being shallow so people cut you some slack and are nicer to you because of your young age.

I don't think age even matters. But if people have to use age to not be offended or insulted and to not get so upset, whatever floats their boat they use to cope.



newbmeister
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23 Sep 2010, 6:37 pm

A good personality makes people more attractive, to me... for instance, if the person is initially unattractive but is funny and easy to talk to, their looks will start seeming more average. Likewise, attractive people who are stupid jerks start looking repellent. I've never technically 'dated,' and I don't think I'd like it; I prefer commitment with someone who starts out as a friend and has similar goals/interests.