Aspie girl with NT girlfriend

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I'm not sure how to put this. I've dated all NT people. Male and female. But I've finally found someone I can really connect with.The only person i've ever been comfortable having touch me, everyone else "hurt". The only person who has ever really understood me, tries to get me. She deals well with all my quirks and odd habits, but sometimes i feel like I'm too much trouble for her. I know how she says she loves me and likes to take care of me, but, i don't want to put too much on her. She's dated another aspie person, and the experience was different. I'm wondering if any one has any advice on how to be more "normal", to be less "aspie". Because I feel that when I have my moments like when i get randomly depressed (also bi-polar) and i just stop functioning, I'll stop texting her, and i know it upsets her, because all she wants to do is make me feel better. Or when we're at the mall and things get too loud or i get too overwhelmed and shut down. I don't know how to be better, i want to make our relationship go smoothly, but it seems with my asperger's i just make it more difficult. i need advice on how to try and bring all my worries up in a converstion with her, and if anyone has any advice on how to be more "normal" so i can try and be better so she doesn't have to worry about me all the time. if i'm happy or upset. i just want us to have as normal a relationship as possible. i would greatly appriciate all advice.

I'm certainly no expert by any means, but I'd say just keep an eye out for a chunk of time where you can both sit down together and have a meaningful conversation about how each of you wants the relationship to work, and what you want out of it. In your case, be sure to explain the reasons behind your behavior, if you haven't done so already. Sometimes with AS, our outward reactions can be misleading from what's actually going on in our heads, so be be clear on the fact that, like, when you start to shut down from sensory overload, it (probably) has nothing really to do with her or anything she might have done to offend you or anything.

The fact that she cares enough to worry about you when she doesn't hear from you after a time is sweet, but also tell her that knowing she worries about you causes you to worry in turn as well. In a relationship, there is a fine line between companionship and over-dependence, and neither of you will be happy if you cross into over-dependence territory. Striking a balance isn't easy, but it can be done with practice and moderation.

As for how to be more 'normal', I'd suggest talking to her about your particular AS traits, and what kind of changes or improvements you'd like to try to make in order to become more adequately adjusted; let her know what you might need or what help or support from her on. Laying out the issues so they're clear and mutually understood, the two of you could start working together to help you improve, you with the conscious effort to change a bit; her by encouraging you to do so, and still accepting you when you may not be able to.

It's not always easy to talk so openly and extensively about what you may not like about yourself, but it really does help to establish a solid basis for mutual trust, respect and cooperation in any kind of relationship.

That was probably pretty abstract, but I'm not really sure how else to explain it without getting redundant or going into detail about my personal views on relationships and social dynamics.