I don't want to date poor people

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I think it's a bit unfair to call the OP a 'gold-digger'; I don't think she said she wanted to date a millionaire. Unfortunate phrasing of the title though.

I would find it difficult to date someone who was flat broke. I like travelling, I like going for meals occasionally. I pay my own way, but I would feel a bit of a mug if I had to pay my boyfriend's way too.

As for getting companionship and love in return- that's a mutual thing. Both parties (should) bring that to the table in a relationship.

ok, this sounds a little stuck up. Unless the 'poor people' are falling at your feet in their droves, what's wrong with a simple normal (Polite!) brush off? As others have pointed out, you don't need to tell them why you're not interested.

Last edited by Lene on 13 Mar 2011, 1:50 am, edited 2 times in total.

I can kind of empathize. I've dated poorer guys before, and it's pretty dismal when you know that
if you pursue a relationship with this person,
all the time you spend with them will have to be at home.

If you want to go see a movie, you have to pay.
If you want to go out for a meal, you have to pay.
Theatre? You.
Ball game? You.
Money for gas? You.

There's a difference in pursuing someone because they're LOADED (gold-digger)
and setting a standard that you're only willing to date someone who can afford to actually, ya know, DATE.

A better title for this may be "I don't want to date people who can't pay their own way" or "bludgers"

As already stated, money isn't a good indicator of character, money can be obtained in different ways, for instance a person can obtain money through inheritance or by living an indecent lifestyle that is devoid of any class or character. Money doesn't define what or who you are, spirit and personality define who you are, someone can have tons of money and little practical or life experience. Sure, it's logical and reasonable to seek someone who seeks to live a wealthy lifestyle but this is one of the reasons marriages aren't working, people aren't dating for genuine reasons but rather for selfish gain, for convenience. Most Americans don't want what is hard, what is difficult, they don't want struggle or adversity, modern life has made them needy, they want the next quick fix rather than having the perseverance and discipline to face hardship. It's probably why European or Brazillian women are held in higher regard compared to American women.

I believe that everything has a logical purpose, a bed is a bed, a car is a car as long as it gets from A to B, i don't care about the superficial value of it, as long as it gets the job done. I'd much rather be with someone who is defined by personality or spirit rather than something superficial and shallow. I couldn't stand being with someone who is status obsessed. I'd much rather be with someone who lives life authentically and down-to-earth rather than someone that has the lifelong ambition to be a parasite like yourself, someone who gains at another persons loss, people like you are the reason this capitalist economy is failing. On a lighter note, there's nothing wrong with wanting someone as productive and ambitious as yourself but the reason people are questioning your intentions is because you've come across as a college girl with princess syndrome, please state your motives more clearly.

I accept if this is your opinion. If not, can you please point me to a source?



And a parasite who gains at another person's loss? That's a bit harsh. I don't think the OP was going in regards to the people she does not want to date.

How about that? Welcome to a guy's dating world

+1

The nag when they have to pay
They nag when they have to drive ( if he doesn't have a car)

I read it and still can't get it.

Now kiss me.

Well it's not my personal opinion, it's a shared opinion of well-travelled men who have experienced different cultures and countries. The picture speaks for itself, The United States has the highest divorce rate in the world. Many European women are intellectual, family-orientated and cultured also, they tend to be able to speak several languages whereas typically American women only know one language.

Even in terms of leading a healthy lifestyle, In Russia and Europe, between 95 percent of the young women are skinny. In contrast, in the USA between 40 and 60 percent of the women are overweight, varying among region. I'm basing this on statistics, not prejudice assumptions or a personal preference of mine, if I met an American women, i will still judge her individually as a person and i'm as open to having an American partner as i am to a European partner. Being healthy, neat, organized, making the best of what you have and being practical is something i value greatly in a relationship, that's my personal preference.



All i'm saying is that money isn't really an indicator of great character, although it's a factor when it comes to finding a mate, it shouldn't be a determining factor. It doesn't define or determine who someone is. For instance, someone having a good physique or an achievement shows they have hard work, discipline and strength. For someone who has won a medal in the Armed forces shows that they have courage and valor. Money shouldn't come before moral character when finding a partner because money doesn't require a person to be of good character or perhaps money is more important than moral character and decency, perhaps being a gold digger and status seeker is more important than being with a bloke that doesn't beat you up or cheat on you? Perhaps you should question why the divorce rate is so high in the US? a relationship is a two-way street, it requires hard work, discipline and maturity, it's an obligation and a commitment to work together as a unit for the benefit of each other, the moment you give yourself to someone, you are giving up your independence to be one with your partner.

Last edited by Wolfheart on 13 Mar 2011, 3:50 am, edited 1 time in total.

You serious? Do you date peope stuck in the 50s?

Weeeell...... if it's a mooching issue, then I'm a lot more sympathetic. But the OP just seemed to be all like "Poor... no offense but EWW."

Yeah I guess I am kind of EWW but in my defence I didn't get that way untill being mooched off of and taken on crappy dates. Now I'm stuck up and probably a bad person.

Not in my experience (well, can't speak for Russia) but in England about a third of women are overweight. As for the rest of Europe, you'll have to go by the figures for each individual country.

Again, not a bad person, but I don't identify. As long as I can get some nookie, I don't care how much they make. Which leads me to, did you at least put out for them? If so, I'll totally change my opinion of you.

Well the United Kingdom is following a similar path to the United States, the UK is becoming similar to the US, it is a very westernized country and shares a similar identity to the United States from a cultural perspective.




Bad for having a set standard and wanting a relationship to be mutual in finacial terms? No. Letting money determine the quality of your date and blaming it on them for being poor ? Yes, I don't know what you define as a bad date but you can have a perfectly good time without money, do something spontaneous, something physically active or just enjoy being in each others company. There are plenty of ways to enjoy yourself without lots of money.

If a girl doesn't have enough innovation or imagination to enjoy herself without using a credit card, I lose interest very quickly. The quality of the date isn't an indicator of money. For instance, i'd much rather get to know someone on a windy beach or hike instead of a nightclub, i'd rather have a milkshake with a girl in a cheap cafe instead of going to some overpriced expensive winebar or restaraunt where I wouldn't feel as comfortable. The superficial value of it doesn't matter, it's the thought behind it that counts. It doesn't mean i'm a poor person or make me any lesser in class, it just means i have a certain taste and preference.

It doesn't make you a bad person unless you feel like a bad person for the choices you make.

just make sure your not judging a book by it's cover so to speak. I'm a perfect example of what a few people have stated in this thread, 95% of the time I look like I either just rolled out from under a car or out of bed, I drive a 12 year old car, and my tastes can be rather "cheap" when it comes to food and drink. I know for a fact at first glance most people either consider me A) a bum B) high school drop out C) loser in general. By looking at me you would probably never assume I have a degree, working on a second which I will be mastering in and make close to 35-40K a year working about 25-30hr a week.

but there is nothing ethically wrong with not going out with someone for any reason, you have to spend the time with the person if you don't want to then don't, simple as that. If you want someone that drives a beamer, dresses like a rap star, and drops hundreds on a date like it's going out of style more power to ya.