MEN Being a DOORMAT without being a DOORMAT

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It is often said that woman don’t like men to be a doormat. But in the effort to be that person, I am being the doormat with knobs on. I don’t care who’s turn it is to wash up dishes or shop for groceries bla bla bla. Much of my patient nature often comes from not caring enough about minor inequalities to do anything about it. But I feel like I need to pretend that I care about them. What I do care about, truth and science, NT woman have no interest in they subconsciously think science and truth have no use to me unless they get her power.

Don't know if this will help at all..

Relevance?

Everybody in life is trying to go home, or find a home, whether it be in motion, in control, or submission.

If one knows where they belong, should happiness matter on whether they can connect with one? or connect with many? Does one have more importance than the other?

To breach the miscommunication gap, is easier than it seems.

Though it takes using your interests, obsessions, strengths, and logic to determine ways to excite, interest, or intrigue those you're interested in yourself. This can be very hard, and definately overwhelming if you overdo yourself.

The thing for me personally, is I've found even with anyone at this point in my life, I am not able to withstand it, without repressing so much of myself, or using all my energy forcing understanding through arguments, headaches, and too much analysis!

I simply become unhappy because I can't be close to another without obsession over them, and alone again all I can feel is an overwhelming desire for music and knowledge. I MUST be alone at least for a few years because I have too much to do.


Hmmn.

Doesn't mean I'm not receptive to connection, If it happens it will happen, but I'm definately going to focus on myself, on the problems I have to solve, and the things I have to create. Someone will love me for me this way, or not at all. Later I might be able to find a between.

There is no other way I've decided, in the past I thought I needed a partner, because I can only be close to one, but every single time I've either lost it entirely, or become depressed, not because I don't love them, in fact its too much of an obsession to do anything else.

Maybe I will indulge in that obsession in a few years, when I'm sure I release lots of anger, learn about how it comes, learn about life and technology, and try and share and receive music.

Oh and work, fortunately also being alone gives me much more strength to keep a job, I'm too young to be secure (21 years) I must be free at least for now and a while.

Just a weird viewpoint and story. Excuse the egocentricity.

If you don't care about it, then don't care about it. It doesn't make you a doormat. Being a doormat is allowing people to misuse or mistreat you in ways that upset you without standing up for yourself.


That's BS. I am a woman, I care about both truth and science, and I care nothing for power. Generalizations get you nowhere.

In their eyes I would be a doormat, so as sure as Christianity is the truth of the multi/uni/verse, I am a doormat.



Aspies are stereotyped as having lack of communications skills is that generalizing, there are many NTs that would say that I have got good communication skills.
Having lack of communication skills is the ultimate lack of power, the polar opposite of politicians and religious leaders (or any leader).

Get to know an aspie long enough and he will communicate more truthful information about his views, ideas, and feeling with less lies and manipulation but is this what they are after?

It still doesn't make you a doormat, they may mistakenly perceive you that way, but that's neither your fault nor your problem.

That's not a generalization, that's a diagnostic criteria.



Who are they? Women? Not all women are after the same things, there are certainly women who would never date a man who isn't a millionaire or who isn't powerful or ... That doesn't mean that all women are like that. Were that true, no average man would ever marry.

You may have dealt with some awful women in your life, must have to believe that all women only want men who get them power, but that doesn't mean that all women are that way. Perhaps it's time to start looking for women elsewhere.

Obviously many of those girls are not going to consciously believe that they are after men of power. They believe that they want love but will tend toward those who either have great potential or have power. On paper aspie man make great dates but it is lack of social status is the social the reason why they have a hard time.

Gently jostling for power sorts out the boundaries, rules, and obligations that prevent relationships from lapsing into deterioration. If you're too much of a "doormat," she'll worry for the future of the relationship and about how commited to it you really are.