Abusive female via this forum dating!

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Joined: 13 Jun 2010
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12 Jul 2011, 11:58 am

I'm surprised you could understand anything she was typing. If she knew you already, she would also ignore trying to make small talk and jump to a topic. Makes me wonder if she is from this site? Then again there are NTs from here also.

Meow101
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13 Jul 2011, 8:52 pm

hyperlexian wrote:

WeatherFreak wrote:

hyperlexian wrote:

she sounded frustrated that you didn't remember some stuff she had already told you, and perhaps you also didn't reply to some PMs. in fact, in seemed like you hardly remembered her at all.

i've had this happen myself with a fellow aspie, and i got tired of reminding him of our mutual background every single time i talked to him. not everyone has the patience to deal with that. i would not be cursing about it, but i would probably break off contact. IF it was even serious.

i just don't see the big deal - she even sounds like she is having a bit of fun with it. perhaps her response is slightly exaggerated or tongue-in-cheek for comic effect? i call people as*hole, bastard, son-of-a-b***h, Motherf***er, etc. all the time. i reserve it for the people i *really* care about though, so they know it's all in fun. perhaps this girl just hasn't learned the boundaries yet.

but what it comes down to...yes, she has a foul mouth, and you don't like that - which is totally fine. thank goodness there are men out there who finds swearing sexy or funny (yes, they do exist). so it's a good idea you cut her loose so she can go find someone who can appreciate it.

Wait what, you swear at people that you like?... Does this seem odd to anyone else?, so if i see my mum and say Hey you mother f***ing b***h, that's ok to you?. Seriously it's not ok even in this day and age to be swearing at someone you care about. And hardly remembering her at all, is jumping the gun. I'm fustrated too on occasion but my swearing goes towards that wind me up or insult me!

I was brought up to respect others and the only thing i forgot was that she added me from here, she didn't tell me what autism she had.

Are there any men on here, that find being sworn at as sexual? or funny or for the matter any women?

hahaha yes, i do call people things like that.

not to my mother, as she is dead. and i didn't like her enough to give her any endearments like that (EDIT: didn't like her in the chummy buddy-buddy way, but i loved her as a mom). i sometimes called my dad a bastard though - in a loving way.

if you look around and pay attention, there are quite a few people who do refer affectionately to their friends with terms like that... notably, it is usually men who say things like that. but that doesn't stop me - i am an honourary man in some circles. those guys enjoy my company and we like to have a laugh (those as*holes are fun to have a pint with).

just because that kind of speech isn't okay to *you* doesn't make it universally wrong.

fair enough that you remembered her to a degree, but it seems quite evident that you were not clear where you knew her from and that upset her. did you go back through your chat logs or PMs to see if she told you what kind of autism she has? she seems to be saying that she already told you.

If I know someone well, I use that kind of language too. *shrug* Don't get what the big deal is....it's just words.

~Kate

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ARustyFirePlace
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13 Jul 2011, 8:56 pm

it's just words bro.......

Xayah
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14 Jul 2011, 3:37 am

Even if she is trying to be funny, girlfriend has issues. Avoid, avoid, avoid.

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WeatherFreak
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14 Jul 2011, 8:14 am

Meow101 wrote:

If I know someone well, I use that kind of language too. *shrug* Don't get what the big deal is....it's just words.

~Kate

**** you Meow101 you Motherf***er

Oh, see what i did there? :wink:

Jonsi
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14 Jul 2011, 10:22 am

WeatherFreak wrote:

Meow101 wrote:

If I know someone well, I use that kind of language too. *shrug* Don't get what the big deal is....it's just words.

~Kate

**** you Meow101 you Motherf***er

Oh, see what i did there? :wink:

But you don't know her well. So it's not in the right context.

starryeyedvoyager
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14 Jul 2011, 4:30 pm

Without being a woman, people tell me that I have a really strange idea of showing my affection to them. I am not that much into swearing, but I am cooking their gooses the most often. People who I care about know that, and most of the time, they know I am kidding when I do that. When training MA, I cannot help but hitting the folks I like harder and faster, to give them something to work with and show them that I give 100% with them.
For me, I think it is part of being in control of an emotional response. I cannot express myself in a "serious" manner, so I do it that way and make people realize that it is my very strange way of showing sympathy and companionship. It is a response I can understand, because it is out of place and out of the ordinary. Because I cannot understand ordinary emotional interaction, I use my... well teasing and friendly mocking - something I really enjoy when someone does it with me, by the way; I am not someone who cannot laugh about themselves - to create an unusual environment for the other where I feel more confident and to make a lasting impression of my feelings. Maybe she was trying to do that: Creating a zone of comfort to express herself in a way that is so out of the ordinary that she basically f**k up interaction with you. Well, basically.

Meow101
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14 Jul 2011, 5:54 pm

Jonsi wrote:

WeatherFreak wrote:

Meow101 wrote:

If I know someone well, I use that kind of language too. *shrug* Don't get what the big deal is....it's just words.

~Kate

**** you Meow101 you Motherf***er

Oh, see what i did there? :wink:

But you don't know her well. So it's not in the right context.

Exactly.

~Kate

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Prilej pentru durere,
Caci mii de lacrimi nu-i ajung
Si tot mai multe cere.
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WeatherFreak
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14 Jul 2011, 6:06 pm

Jonsi wrote:

WeatherFreak wrote:

Meow101 wrote:

If I know someone well, I use that kind of language too. *shrug* Don't get what the big deal is....it's just words.

~Kate

**** you Meow101 you Motherf***er

Oh, see what i did there? :wink:

But you don't know her well. So it's not in the right context.

Nor did that woman i spoke to, so again she had no right to swear at me :p

hyperlexian
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14 Jul 2011, 8:17 pm

WeatherFreak wrote:

Jonsi wrote:

WeatherFreak wrote:

Meow101 wrote:

If I know someone well, I use that kind of language too. *shrug* Don't get what the big deal is....it's just words.

~Kate

**** you Meow101 you Motherf***er

Oh, see what i did there? :wink:

But you don't know her well. So it's not in the right context.

Nor did that woman i spoke to, so again she had no right to swear at me :p

you talked on here, and were friends on facebook.

anyway, you deleted her right? clearly you're not destined to be best friends.

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cdfox7
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14 Jul 2011, 8:55 pm

ARustyFirePlace wrote:

it's just words bro.......

BNIGO!! ! Very true thos at the same time one needs to remember the words have a personal meaning based on perception to everyone that can trigger past experiences. EG. I just have to say the word Mother and that one word has a difference meaning for everyone based on that person's experiences and perceptions of mother figures in there lifes.

ARustyFirePlace
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14 Jul 2011, 9:13 pm

yes, but if a person I hardly know said those things then I wouldn't really care, even though I am very sensitive.

Others might be different, obviously

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