Proposed 40+ something Love and Dating Forum thread

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HopefulRomantic
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01 Nov 2011, 11:43 am

Last week while perusing the Love and Dating forums, I read an inveterate poster’s commentary about the absence of threads focusing on the love/dating/marriage challenges/issues/concerns that fortysomething plus WP members encounter in their daily lives. As a fortysomething single female who regularly frequents the L & D forums, I concur wholeheartedly. After exchanging PMs with approximately 30 forty/fifty/sixty something WP members (including male, female, single – including divorced, married, with children, childless), the vast majority of replies I received indicated an interest in the creation of such a thread for the 40 plus age group.

As with anything in life, nothing ventured, nothing gained! I would like to propose some new threads specifically to address these issues. As I envision it, there would be ten separate threads – each addressing the critically significant tasks/stages of the pursuit of 40 something plus dating, love and marriage. (No doubt, each one is a Herculean task in its own right.) Perhaps, if this experiment takes off, others will suggest more.

Below please find, a proposed first cut for a framework of threads which address:
(1) “the who to date” (identifying viable romantic matches)

(2) “the where to locate/find” (Internet or IRL venues to locate viable romantic matches)

(3) “the how to approach” (techniques/required social skills/communication to obtain dates)

(4) “the where to go/what to do on the first and successive dates” (activities conducive to a good date(s)

(5) “the how to decipher/translate what your match is/is not telling you” (figuring out what the heck they actually mean – probably the biggest challenge of all)

(6) “the how to of coping with snafus of dating” (there is always going to be some sort of miscommunication/snafus)

(7) “the how to and why of maintaining and/or elevating the commitment level” (including if it is worthwhile after a specified period of time – romantic cost/benefit analysis of sorts)

(8) “the how to deal with a breakup” (coping strategies to let go and move on seamlessly)

(9) “the why and how to of marriage” (including the challenges, risks and rewards of the responsibilities of long-term commitment, children, cohabitation) and

(10) “lessons learned” (leveraging the wisdom of having chosen incompatible/asynchronous romantic matches with the goal in mind of gleaning/ferreting out the root cause of our past erroneous choices so as to avoid them in future endeavors)

By creating unique stand alone threads for each task/step/stage, it would seem that it lends some organization and ease of use (so that posters know where to post their questions/comments and the like). The aim here is to create a framework to facilitate the efficient and effective sharing of certain members’ inquiries and other members’ replies and advice, experiences, anecdotes, thoughts, meanderings, what have you.

Any and all feedback and input is welcome. Anyone else in?

“Laissez les bontemps roulez.” Let the good times roll!



lilypadfad
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01 Nov 2011, 12:35 pm

Sounds like another forum subdivision destined to become a bucket full of misery and fail, but I'll be glad to stop by now and then, handing out plane tickets for the 40+ men and cat supplies to the 40+ women.


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Moog
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01 Nov 2011, 12:41 pm

lilypadfad wrote:
Sounds like another forum subdivision destined to become a bucket full of misery and fail, but I'll be glad to stop by now and then, handing out plane tickets for the 40+ men and cat supplies to the 40+ women.


Helpful


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techstepgenr8tion
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01 Nov 2011, 12:42 pm

HR, as far as I understand it folder-estate is at a premium around here; these website forms have an upper limit and right now its at the point where a new one cannibalizes another typically.

What about a 40+ dating sticky in the In-Depth Adult Life folder? I figure that could likely fit a lot of your objectives.


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spongy
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01 Nov 2011, 12:48 pm

techstepgenr8tion wrote:
HR, as far as I understand it folder-estate is at a premium around here; these website forms have an upper limit and right now its at the point where a new one cannibalizes another typically.

What about a 40+ dating sticky in the In-Depth Adult Life folder? I figure that could likely fit a lot of your objectives.

I´d be more than happy to create a sticky that linked to the several threads directed towards over 40 people here or at adult.

I think its a great idea and it could be very helpfull plus its nice to see such a good iniciative for a change.

Having said that we have no say on which forums are created and you´d have to contact alex about that one.


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Moog
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01 Nov 2011, 12:51 pm

techstepgenr8tion wrote:
HR, as far as I understand it folder-estate is at a premium around here; these website forms have an upper limit and right now its at the point where a new one cannibalizes another typically.

What about a 40+ dating sticky in the In-Depth Adult Life folder? I figure that could likely fit a lot of your objectives.


I think that's a good idea . Would you like to start it, HR?


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techstepgenr8tion
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01 Nov 2011, 12:52 pm

spongy wrote:
techstepgenr8tion wrote:
HR, as far as I understand it folder-estate is at a premium around here; these website forms have an upper limit and right now its at the point where a new one cannibalizes another typically.

What about a 40+ dating sticky in the In-Depth Adult Life folder? I figure that could likely fit a lot of your objectives.

I´d be more than happy to create a sticky that linked to the several threads directed towards over 40 people here or at adult.

I think its a great idea and it could be very helpfull plus its nice to see such a good iniciative for a change.

Having said that we have no say on which forums are created and you´d have to contact alex about that one.


I'll let HR make the call since its his idea. As for my membership - I have eight years from two Saturdays after this one before I can claim membership :).


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01 Nov 2011, 1:00 pm

AWESOME to see this idea gaining ground! thank you HR!


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gadge
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01 Nov 2011, 1:39 pm

Just let me know where it ends up and I'll be there.


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universeofone
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01 Nov 2011, 2:10 pm

I support the idea. Count me in.



wyldragon
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01 Nov 2011, 2:13 pm

Sounds great to me!! It will be very appreciated if this were done!! :)



zen_mistress
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01 Nov 2011, 2:21 pm

I think it is a great idea, hopefulromantic.


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HopefulRomantic
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01 Nov 2011, 4:10 pm

techstepgenr8tion wrote:
HR, as far as I understand it folder-estate is at a premium around here; these website forms have an upper limit and right now its at the point where a new one cannibalizes another typically.

What about a 40+ dating sticky in the In-Depth Adult Life folder? I figure that could likely fit a lot of your objectives.



Thanks for your input. To clarify my understanding, I should start a carbon copy of this thread in the folder you mentioned above. Does this IDAL folder have sufficient space to hold 10 unique stand alone threads? Please advise.

Please feel free to respond here or in PM as you deem appropriate!

Thanks again!

On a more personal note, I am Leslie - please feel free to address as such - or HR is just fine!



HopefulRomantic
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01 Nov 2011, 4:40 pm

spongy wrote:
techstepgenr8tion wrote:
HR, as far as I understand it folder-estate is at a premium around here; these website forms have an upper limit and right now its at the point where a new one cannibalizes another typically.

What about a 40+ dating sticky in the In-Depth Adult Life folder? I figure that could likely fit a lot of your objectives.

I´d be more than happy to create a sticky that linked to the several threads directed towards over 40 people here or at adult.

I think its a great idea and it could be very helpfull plus its nice to see such a good iniciative for a change.

Having said that we have no say on which forums are created and you´d have to contact alex about that one.



Spongy,

Thanks for your input as always! Please confirm my understanding - (1) if I create the 10 unique, stand alone proposed threads per my opening post - you will link them all via sticky? If my understanding is correct - will all 10 threads still be accessible for posting purposes on an individual basis? Please advise.

Please allow me to apologize as I am a little scatterbrained now. Today was a hectic day. The bank I work for is finishing up a merger so we have lots of high risk merger related projects - one I am working on is the NOAM to Active Directory domain migration project. In totality, we have 110,000 users for whom we have to migrate their user and computer objects. Today, we migrated approximately 550 users and of course there is the inevitable technical problems (Client Manager health issues which prevent the migration executable script from being successful and remote access connectivity issues for users who work from home via VPN). All I can say is thank goodness for the technical staff we have who remediate the snafus. For about 4 hours, straight I had 15 IMs coming at me, my two business lines ringing and my cell phone! And now I am wrapping two birthday presents for two friends for who I am hosting a birthday dinner for tonight at a local Italian restaurant. I think I will not be plagued by insomnia tonight! lol.



HopefulRomantic
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01 Nov 2011, 4:42 pm

Moog wrote:
techstepgenr8tion wrote:
HR, as far as I understand it folder-estate is at a premium around here; these website forms have an upper limit and right now its at the point where a new one cannibalizes another typically.

What about a 40+ dating sticky in the In-Depth Adult Life folder? I figure that could likely fit a lot of your objectives.


I think that's a good idea . Would you like to start it, HR?


Thanks Moog! How are you doing? I will start it after I receive clarification from Tech and Spongy. Thanks!



HopefulRomantic
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01 Nov 2011, 4:43 pm

hyperlexian wrote:
AWESOME to see this idea gaining ground! thank you HR!



Thank you sister Hyperlexian! How is your Hottie doing??