what does it even mean..

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Joined: 6 Jan 2012
Gender: Male
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11 Jan 2012, 8:28 pm

this girl i have been talking to for 2 years. tells me she loves me i tell her i love her. shes in love with me. she wants to be with me, and she can see herself marrying me having kids with me, but will not become fully involved with me as in a relationship because she says that i am not ready for other people i cant be with someone. because i cannot talk to someone on the phone and i guess that really bugs her so much..i understand i guess. but im 19 i started talking to her at 17.. she knows me more than i know myself. and its so difficult because she says ill always be in her life.. as a best friend even though she and i want more than that. and it sucks because shes in college and she obviously will be around other guys often and she has fallen for other guys and has attempted to be in a relationship with them but fails and she comes back to me.. what do you guys think..

OneStepBeyond
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11 Jan 2012, 8:30 pm

she's using you as emotional back-up

young love sucks

suspending
Emu Egg
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11 Jan 2012, 8:32 pm

OneStepBeyond wrote:

she's using you as emotional back-up

young love sucks

it really does :/

OneStepBeyond
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11 Jan 2012, 8:32 pm

oh look, your name is suspending hahah

Trigas
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11 Jan 2012, 8:33 pm

suspending wrote:

Avoid like the plague!! !! Girls like this are nothing but emotionally draining trouble. It's best to count your losses and just leave her as she is. She obviously isn't mature enough to know what she wants and she'll only drag you along.

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suspending
Emu Egg
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11 Jan 2012, 8:36 pm

Trigas wrote:

suspending wrote:

it almost feels like i NEED her in my life so i feel that i could never find someone else.. i could never just drop her or walk away from it all.. i hate love. hahah.

Trigas
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11 Jan 2012, 8:41 pm

suspending wrote:

Trigas wrote:

suspending wrote:

it almost feels like i NEED her in my life so i feel that i could never find someone else.. i could never just drop her or walk away from it all.. i hate love. hahah.

No no no no no no no just NO. You really don't want that if you ever want a stable relationship with someone. I've been in your situation before. I know how it is for your whole world to revolve around that one girl that you think you could never be away from. She's using you for her own gain and there doesn't seem to be any good thing you are getting from this. This isn't love, love isn't selfish.

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TeaEarlGreyHot
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11 Jan 2012, 8:43 pm

Trust me... lace up those shoes of yours and run far and fast. Away from her. She's getting a love-high off you. Using you, whether she means to or not.

It may hurt doing that to her, but it'll hurt you more if you continue to allow her to use you in this way.

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bucephalus
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11 Jan 2012, 8:46 pm

suspending wrote:

You need to be visibly linked with other girls, in the same way that she has guys around her in college. I'm certain if you're conveniently 'seen' hanging out with other girls your friend will soon start acting on her words and come out of the woodwork. Not many people want something until they're about to lose it, no matter how good it is.

Also, what's this about talking on the phone, if she's that important you'll speak on the phone right? or have i misread something

[edit]

i've noticed that your relationship is of the long distance nature from a post elsewhere. In that case you might have to talk more about your other female friends to play her at her own game. And yep, i think you're gonna have to take the plunge and answer her phonecalls. i promise it won't be anywhere near as scary as it seems

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mds_02
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11 Jan 2012, 10:32 pm

suspending wrote:

it almost feels like i NEED her in my life so i feel that i could never find someone else.. i could never just drop her or walk away from it all.. i hate love. hahah.

Heroin addicts say the same thing. Cut off contact with her before she ruins your life.

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Wolfheart
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12 Jan 2012, 4:16 am

Sounds like you are on the back burner, she is using you and expects you to act like a supportive boyfriend or best friend without the perks of intimacy and commitment.

Berns
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