Aspies and terms of endearment

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Blerk! In my one head over heels relationship I felt "baby girl" coming out of me organically so I just stuck with that for my ex but I NEVER said it in front of other people and I never would. I find PDA's awkward

Sweetie, honey etc seem awkward.

We do use names though, in fact, we never use our real names in private. They're only for other people, or to indicate seriousness. We use animal names, mostly Bear, Bird, and Monkey. Neither of us has a specific name, we can both be Bird, so they're sort of like pet names that way. But they have context. Bird is all purpose, it can even be used during disagreements, it's the most common one. Monkey is placating, unsure what reaction to expect ("Monkey, I really need to ask you something") - but also an expression of delight. Bear acknowledges the other person might not be in the best of mood ("did I wake you up, Bear?").

I don't know how we came to use the terms or how they acquired these uses, they just did.

Honeypie, sugarbutt, boo, angelrump, huggybear, boobear... Oh, yuck... Makes me wanna vomit right now. I remember my friends who kept saying this to each other. Ick.

Those sound offensive too me I think because of the 2nd word in them

Not at all I find them cute and amusing I laugh when they say things that I think are silly but hey I still laugh when they call me silly pet names.

They do, kind of, but apparently it's "cute" and stuff.

Adding butt to the end makes it cute! I know, strange huh? I had often wondered why my Aspie never calls me anything endearing. I thought he just didn't feel we were that close yet. Then I read that one post.....Kinme-those terms make even me want to vomit! I just can't help it sometimes. "Babe" just comes out. I don't call any guy that,just him.

I always thought I was totally against pet names and such sugary sappy conventions. In my first relationship my husband wanted me to call him something "sweet" but I found it revolting when I tried. This went along with the fact that I did not feel I understood what love actually meant and I did not ever think I could really feel that way about someone. Certainly I did not have feelings I would call love for my husband; I was with him because I thought he was the only person who would ever want me. However my second relationship, which has now lasted for 20 months, is very different. I can honestly say that I am in love with my partner, which, as stupid as it may sound, is a very strange and confusing thing to me. Somehow along with that has come this novel desire to make a fool of myself by using terms of endearment that made me roll my eyes in the past. Also I do use affectionate terms for my son but I feel that that is different from the context of a romantic relationship. It seems hard to say something is childish when you are talking to a four year old.

I come from a family where we rarely show emotions (last year, my grandmother got me really upset by being very cold on the phone, and since I was then both struggling with the loss of my dear dog and beginning to accept AS as a part of me (albeit without a diagnosis), I broke down completely. My mom told my aunt, who called my grandmother and told her to be kinder to me, and when my birthday came up, my grandmother had actually written on my birtday card that she and my grandfather loved me. That actually made my mom cry. I guess that gives you an idea of how things are here...), and so I'm not that used to pet names. While growing up, I was sometimes refered to as "Miss [surname]", which I hated, but that's about it. I have a male coworker who's about 15 years older than me who sometimes calls me what I guess would answer to "my dear" or "sweetie" in English, in a way that makes me feel cared for and safe - he says it as an older person who shows affection for a younger person.

I've never had a boyfriend, and I never use pet names on friends - it doesn't come naturally, and I find it very odd when hearing it from others. Also, I'm completely unable to reprogram my mind when someone wants to be called something different from what they were called when I first met them. However, when talking to my late dog and my current cat, I use a ridiculous range of pet names, so I guess I may turn out to be a horrible pet namer if I get a boyfriend... Unless, of course, I'm only able to use silly names when talking to someone who understands the tone of my voice but not the words I speak...

Maybe the use of gooey names is a way to tell the other person that one's willing to reduce onself to this impressive level of silliness because one trusts the other person that much? Like telling someone a secret to show them that you trust them?

That's cute. For some reason.
I call my partner bubbles, babbles, (both stemming from a young-chicken-related typo in a text conversation), polyp (he has sinus polyps) and moosie (because he has really long eyelashes and big brown eyes and invisible antlers).
I hate hate HATE "babe". It just irritates me. We don't call each other that ever. "Baby" is less irritating depending on how often it is used (the less often the better)
Although you know..not that many people pause enough to address each other by name, so it really tickles me to just hear him say my name in positive situations

I'm not a big fan of using pet names, but then again I usually don't use anyone's name when I talk to them. I just go, "hey, you!" or something so that they know I'm talking to them (if anyone specific). I usually have my own names for people, and sometimes they don't even include spoken words. It's hard enough for me to remember others' "real" names without having new pet names added! And, yes, I think it's pretty annoying, but not as bad as when lovers feed each other!

I have no problem with nicknames, though, except that if I learn someone's nickname it tends to become my primary spoken name for the person to the point where I have trouble learning and remembering their "real" names again.

Strangely, for me, "babe" is pretty much the only term I can tolerate. To me it is more casual and less cutesy. It is the only term I will use on my partner, too. I found out recently from an ex that he never really liked that term though. I wish he had told me this some time during the 3 years we were together! Not sure what alternative I could have used though.

I thought the baby girl comment by Dan_undiagnosed was cute too! I thought it was sweet.made me say "Aww".
What I noticed is that in my previous relationship, I never called him ANYTHING. With my new guy I find myself calling him everything imaginable. Babe, honey, hun, dear, sweetheart and and other terms in different languages. I just loves him a lot! Yet he calls me by my first name. Although not often because there is no need. Not even by my nickname which everybody uses???

Most pet names just sound stupid to me. It probably has to do with me always thinking their literal meaning when I hear them.

I don't know why i hate pet names, but i do. I've never used one, and my gf only very rarely uses one on me. If i have to refer to her i use a slight contraction of her name, but that's only really when in the presence of others and i have to make that distinction.

I barely ever use anyone's name, come to think of it. If somone says hi to me and uses my name i usually just reply with "hi", and that's that. I'll introduce people to others with a name, but in any other circumstance it seems superfluous (maybe that's it?).

Weird...

I use pet names constantly with my children (ages 8 and 6) but almost never with a significant other. It just sounds forced to me (and this is just my own bias, that I wish I could overcome).