I think she seems better off without me..

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I've had a serious fancy over a girl since highschool and it's been a few years now since we graduated..

She has been travelling, other continents, meeting famous people. She hangs out with her friends, and seems very down to earth.

She is a church girl but I get the vibe that she isn't that dedicated to it, this being a good thing as I am not compatible with hardcore churchies.


My point being, I have never even talked to this woman. She probably has no idea I exist. She is getting along fine while I am going through some tough hell.


I can't meetup with her.. there's no way I could run into her as I don't get out at all.

I have her address (I think its correct) as she posted it once and I wrote it down!

I know creepy.. whatever.


I should ask her on facebook, but im not going to. I know I wont because im in too bad of a mess right now- it's not fair to bring her into it.

Thanks for sharing.

Not a problem.

You know, I once hooked my uncle up with a girl.. elderly woman. Asked me to tell him to call her.

I did and it was AWKWARD as all getup. I hardly spoke to the man before. So yeahh... call this chick dude. (keeping in mind im 20 hes 55 ish?)

Afterwords I was like "why not? Huh!?! I can pass a message!"

I was kinda hoping the good deed would get me some karma.. you know like thought suggest my crush to ask me out. Sigh/

My only hope is telepathy. :S

I wish you luck with your HS crush. Remember, there are always more fishes in the sea if she doesn't work out.

Everyone has some kind of struggle and hell they are facing. Just because she seems to be getting along great doesn't mean she is doing so fantastic. She may not be showing the entire story.

My advice to connect to her in the least-creepy way possible would be to send her a Christmas card or something along those lines. I don't know about you, but around major holidays I always get plenty of cards from people and businesses I didn't remember had my address and I always feel delighted that someone thought of me. If you're a friend of hers on facebook or whatever, maybe it will spur a thank you message. Worst case scenario she may send a "who are you and how did you get my address?" message in which case you can say " I am ___ from High School and you posted your address here a while back. How have you been doing?"
Successful conversation starter!

Good idea, but spool back there a second...

I'm not yet facebook friends even. That's how shy I am- it's horrible! :S

We share some common facebook buddies, but they are all people that added me while in highschool. It's kinda awkward to add her now for seemingly no reason and as such i'm stuck@!

And good point, people like to hide things. I will keep that in mind...

I think just saying high on FB and starting a convo that way would be a good first step, It will allow you to talk to her in small doses in case you get nervous easy. Sometimes its hard to talk to people especially a crush whom you've never really talked to yet.

I find if I'm nervous its easier to talk to someone online than in real life.

just something small like " Hi I'm _______, I don't think I've gotten to introduce myself properly "

Okay! 1st step is add her on FB.
FB likes to suggest people you may know randomly. If you have friends in common, she's likely to be suggested. Not awkward at all. If she has any doubts, she clicks on your profile and sees "# mutual friends" Instant reason for you to know her or find her profile.


Do this. Go to her profile. Hover over the "add friend" button. Close your eyes. Click your mouse. Don't look at your computer screen. Just look at your keyboard and open your eyes and alt + f4 or something so the page goes away.
As pathetic as it sounds, I have done this. Once you click the button you wait for them to add you. If you don't watch yourself do it, it's almost like she added you first. I hope that makes sense! lol

Gonna need to take a little raincheck for now I think, our family is possibly splitting up..

Not that its a bad thing, just delays all my plans a little.

Will resume pending relocation and future stability.


A few quick questions for then:

-Does a happy profile picture make a better impression?
-How long after adding (assuming she says yes) should I wait to say something?
-Do I need to refrain from saying "you're cute" or such for some time or right away?

I can't believe i'm considering this even... it seems crazy!

Edit:
we have 30 mutual friends, and we all (including her) went to highschool together..

I'm in a similar situation. Except, it's in high school in VA and the crush I have has already graduated before me right now. I have the same shyness from the creepiness-prevention ideas. Fortunately for me, she's South African and my dad got some fizzers (candy from S.A) so I got her interest with about 2 conversations.

The Facebook thing Is the Hardest. though, I was able to do it.

Simply just put in your mind this

"Be who you are and say who you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind."
~Dr. Seuss

Or give something Unusual about her that she can't get a grasp on like what I just did. Only question is do you have similar interests and can you take the lead?

No idea, never talked to her yet even.. This is icebreaker 101. I just hope it turns out better than RMS Titanic.