yellowtamarin wrote:
What a [girl] is like around me matters. [She] can be quiet, shy, etc. in social settings, but if [she] doesn't open up to me it's going nowhere.
Yup, I quite agree - but more than that - at least for relationship, anyway. Namely, not only what is she like with/around me, but even much more importantly, what's she like around me when it's just the two of us. If she
still can't open up and remains quite incapable of communicating, and communicating
well with me, even when it's just the two of us, then, well, it won't work for us as a "relationship" anyway. Doesn't mean we couldn't be good - maybe even excellent - friends, ... but ... not gonna work for me as relationship if we can't communicate highly to extremely well.
And ... communicate / communication ... doesn't mean it's got to work in any, all, and every way between the two of us. E.g. if someone totally misses social cues and subtle hints, etc., that itself isn't necessarily a problem at all. It's matter of getting the communication to work quite well between the two of us - via whatever means we use that works between us.
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Autistic/BAP 105 aloof, 90 rigid, 93 pragmatic, 8% on diagnosis
NT 27%,19% AQ 39; HSP 15; Aspie 97 of 200, NT 104 of 200
EIQ 58; Reading the mind in the eyes 28