Being hit on

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So lately this guy I know through school has been messaging me telling me how much he likes me and expressing his desires for a relationship. I tried telling him nicely that I have no interest in him and do not want a relationship anytime soon, yet he kept persisting to message me telling me how much he likes me. Yesterday, he told me that he thinks he's in love with me, and today it got even worse, and he was sending me explicit things about my body and telling me that I am sexy. I really don't know how to nicely tell him that I don't want anything remotely close to what he's asking for. I don't know how to flirt however I've just been going along with this as if I do want a relationship. I feel bad because it's probably leading him on but I have no idea how to handle this situation. I wish I could just tell him that this is very undesirable for me and that while he seems like a nice person I do not want to pursue a relationship, but I don't think that's how NT people usually handle things, and I don't want to come off as a weirdo (as I have to others in the past). A few months short of a year ago, a 3 year relationship that I had with another guy ended (on good terms). while I think I would be ready to move on, the guy I was dating was also an Aspie and he understood sensory issues and the need for personal space and time. I am sort of afraid to date a NT person because they probably wouldn't respect the space I need and the fact that I can't be bothered without getting angry. But anyways, after this huge rant, long story short: I need to know how to get this guy to stop hitting on me without seeming like a weirdo or coming off as a jerk.

Say this:
"This thing you're feeling, I'm not feeling it, and that is not subject to change. Please drop it before it gets really awkward. I don't mean to insult you, and I'm sure you can find someone else who'll respond more favorably to your advances, but that's not me, so please, move along. You're barking up the wrong tree, and there's a whole forest out there for you to bark at."
You have to be direct. This guy's obviously not on the same page as you are, and you have to flip it for him, because he's likely in a place where he thinks you're "playing hard to get", and you might have to assert with absolute clarity that there is no playing going on in order for him to let go of the idea. And if that doesn't stop him, report him, because at that point it's sexual harassment.

You will have to tell him directly that you don't desire any relationship with him. Considering that you have been playing along and he may have felt like you were leading him on, you may have to expect a harsh and maybe even angry response as a result. You may have to prepare for something like that, and hopefully others here will help you in handling that if it happens.

Tell him that you do not want a relationship and that romantic feelings are not a choice per se. Don't play mind games, use him to boost your ego or anything like that if you actually value his friendship.

Alright thanks guys. I will have to tell him straight up that I do not want this. I'm scared to though so I'll wait until the next time he talks to me or at least tomorrow.

Trust me, I am not trying to use him in any way at all. I wouldn't do that to someone. It was sort of feeling like I was undeliberately using him though which is why I thought I'd come here for some help on what to do next. My social skills are not all there, but the unfortunate part is that he'll probably lash out on me because he doesn't understand that. I have to see him tomorrow at a school event, and I'm not sure whether or not I should tell him before or after. In person is not an option since I can barely talk to people about things that aren't stressful.

Nice way: You seem like a really nice guy but I'm (not interested in anything like that / seeing someone else ) But thanks, I'm flattered. If he persists then you get progressively more direct and unpleasant. Sometimes that's what it takes.

I always try to remember to flatter someone who makes a pass. It's one of the few areas where I feel comfortable lying if I need to. I know what it feels like to be let down nicely versus not nicely but you don't need to be nice if someone isnt listening.

Wow, you have that many women interested in you that you turn many of them down on a regular basis??

I wish I had your problems, instead I've got the opposite.

I'm older and settled and it almost never happens today. But when I was younger and going out it would certainly happen. If you want to get hit by a bus you have to find a busy street.

To be honest, I think it is now time to get someone older involved - what you're describing sounds like harassment to me. If you have a grown-up or a teacher that you feel you can trust, now would be the time to let them know that this guy is not letting up. Sure - I'm a little bit jumpy when it comes to things like this, but I personally wouldn't be able to tolerate having to tell someone more than twice to back off. Problem is that this person doesn't seem to get the message... be wary - letting situations like this continue for any length of time always ends badly. Just my opinion though.

I'd say it's probably worth a shot to just be direct with the guy once before making a big deal of it. Of course, if he continues after being directly and explicitly (not implicitly) told to back off, it becomes harassment and it's time to report him.