Who else here would feel kinda awkward dating another aspie?

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Joined: 14 Oct 2009
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03 Sep 2012, 6:09 pm

Sidmor wrote:

I may have brought this up before.

Aspies generally get along well with animals and feel increased empathy towards them because we think visually like they do, while the NTs think verbally and via symbolics, the latter of which is one of the reasons why we may often feel detached from the NTs.

Similarly, we probably generally potentially (lol) would get along well with each other, with the encounter feeling more natural than it would with NTs. I have even heard a claim that Autists feel more empathy towards each other than the NTs feel towards each other.

Not that I had much of a personal experience from AS-AS encounters, even though I do have a couple of friends whom I suspect having AS, and with which I can get along naturally, and instinctively even avoid stuff such as eye contact most of the time without mentioning it.

I want to date yellowtamarin for the fact she has a snake in her avatar, I'm

more of us don't have animals in our avatars .I should update mine with birdies on my shoulder (or head) the male is the boss :roll:

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TM
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03 Sep 2012, 6:16 pm

Depends, if her special interest was blow-jobs I'm sure it could be quite awesome.

JNathanK
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04 Sep 2012, 2:32 pm

That would be awesome.

CrystalStars
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04 Sep 2012, 4:52 pm

Wouldn't know until I'd tried it, although I imagine it'd be better than dating a NT person.

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05 Sep 2012, 12:08 am

CrystalStars wrote:

Wouldn't know until I'd tried it, although I imagine it'd be better than dating a NT person.

ou

Same here.

Nerdyimperator
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05 Sep 2012, 12:15 pm

I wouldn't feel awkward at all. To be honest I would feel much mor awkward dating an NT and all of the social baggage that goes with it.

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05 Sep 2012, 11:21 pm

I'm not really sure if dating someone who is AS or NT is better. I think someone's personality and things in common are more important. I dated an NT briefly about a year ago, and the relationship didn't work because he was immature, not because he was NT(I guess I shouldn't expect much from a 16 year-old, which was his age at the time). Now I've been seeing a different guy with mild AS. He seems cool, and we have a lot in common. Getting to know him is fun, but it is way to early to determine if I'd want to be his girlfriend. I'm only in college, so I haven't lived long enough to have a lot of life/dating experience. I'm a bit apprehensive about seeing an aspie because I'm used to NT guys. I can easily tell if NT guys are interested in me or not. I guess I'll have to learn more about aspie males, because I haven't met very many.

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25 Sep 2012, 6:48 pm

I've been married to two NT men prior to my current relationship with an aspie - this relationship is superior in every way because we understand each other. I left the other two because they couldn't possibly understand how I think and see the world, no matter how hard they tried. :roll:

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26 Sep 2012, 8:24 am

yellowtamarin wrote:

BigBossMSF wrote:

I have mor ea desire to be normal than just be complacent with being segregated to dating aspies.

I don't think of it as a segregation. I wouldn't actively search for an aspie, specifically, to date. For me it is about finding someone who I have a common bond with, like you said in your original post, and I think I would tend to feel more connected with people who are in a similar place on the spectrum as me. By "spectrum" I mean the entire thing, including NTs. A lot of the things that I value in a partner are things that people at the more AS end tend to have, so by default I may end up with an aspie, and that wouldn't worry me.

Actually I tend to get along best with "cuspies", a term I learnt a couple of months ago which refers to those who are near the borderline, if there was such a thing. Who coined that term anyway? Hats off to you

Fellow cuspie here!! !

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Tim_Tex
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26 Sep 2012, 8:26 am

TM wrote:

Depends, if her special interest was blow-jobs I'm sure it could be quite awesome.

Kinda like me, except with traveling, animated sitcoms, and indie films/music, and various other artsy stuff in addition.

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26 Sep 2012, 8:27 am

Part of me wants a girl like me, and part of me thinks this combination would be utter madness.

thewhitrbbit
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26 Sep 2012, 8:29 am

Tough call.

I'd have to say it would defend on the person.

Someone close to the NT side but still AS might be fun.

One of the stay home all day no touching aspies would be hell.

Rorberyllium
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26 Sep 2012, 10:19 am

I've been there. It was good for a month and then the second month things went to hell, but there were a ton of factors involved with that.

Communication is extremely difficult, but also very important, and when you have two (or more) people who have specific issues with communicating, it makes things even more challenging.

I'd be open to trying it again though with the right person.

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26 Sep 2012, 4:54 pm

Ive dated a couple aspies before and well I found out it they werent a good match for me. Well were both stubborn and we both lack empathy. Uhh? Not that great. I will give aspies a chance but I hold skepticism and I wont jump into anything. I kinda realized that its beneficial for at least 1 partner to have suffieicient empathy perhaps. And well if its not me, its kinda gotta be the other person. That is a quality I am attracted to in a mate.

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26 Sep 2012, 4:54 pm

1000Knives wrote:

Part of me wants a girl like me, and part of me thinks this combination would be utter madness.

It absolutely IS utter madness...but I can say, for my part, this is the best relationship I've ever had. Hands down, bar none.

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26 Sep 2012, 5:59 pm

No I've got better things to do with my time than listen to people talk about themselves I only like to look after #1 me , nobody else is going to are they now?

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