I don't like kissing

Post Reply New Topic

I don't mind small closed mouth kisses, I just really don't like tongues, or kissing of any kind for a long time. My boyfriend sometimes gets annoyed and says it makes me seem distant or like I don't want to be close to him. I just really don't like it, the sensation is just bad for me. I have no issues with having sex or any other sexual activity of any kind, which just confuses him more, that I will happily engage in supposedly more intimate acts but not what most people are OK with since the age of 14/15. I don't understand it myself, it just feels uncomfortable to me. It's not an intimacy issue with him, our relationship is generally good and I'm completely comfortable around him in emotional and sexual situations, except for this one thing that just makes me feel awkward.

Does anyone else have this problem, or suggestions as to what I could do

Yep, exactly the same. Especially tongues or big slobbery kisses! I prefer it when they're small and close-mouthed, or it makes me cringe. A bad kisser is a bad kisser - most guys I've kissed just do not respond to suggestions, making it impossible for me to kiss them.

I'm afraid I don't have any suggestions except to find a better kisser!

You either? Welcome to the club lol

I feel the same way. Don't have any solutions for you, I'm afraid.

yeah same here I have no innate like of or ability to lol

Shoving my tongue in someone's mouth seems kind of gross to me. What magic force makes people suddenly overcome their aversion to saliva in their teens and get the urge to shove their tongues in other people's mouths and share their slobber? I'd probably be able to tolerate it, but right now it doesn't seem very appealing.

I like all varieties of kissing, I just usually think I'm bad at it. I've been told I'm a great kisser though.

Deep kisses are fine as long as there aren't wet tongues involved. I was kissing someone once, we were lying down, and spools of his saliva would drop down into my mouth and I would gag involuntarily.

Mmmm~ delicious saliva

I dont like it either. your mouth is the dirtyist part on the human body, the sad fact of the matter is people do not have good oral hygine
Therefore I refuse to kiss anyone,

I understand completely. I HATE kissing! I have your exact situation, except without the significant other (anymore). My advice is to not, under ANY circumstances, let him force you to "try" kissing or to "overcome" or "get over" your sensory problems. Don't even consider it, because whether he realizes it or not, he's asking you to suffer just so he feels "intimate" with you. I mean, why can't he cuddle with you and have sex with you? What's so important about kissing that makes some of these Neurotypicals have to whine about it?

I feel strongly about this because I was dating an abusive person and he would force me to kiss him even though it hurt so much. On the day he tried to kill me, he kissed me and was rough with me and wouldn't let me go. If your boyfriend pushes you to do this, it is abuse, and you need to make it clear to him that you will not allow it. Sometimes, compromise is necessary, and sometimes it's important to step out of your comfort zone, but this is NOT one of those times--at least not for you.

Hopefully he'll understand, but he may not, and if he doesn't, he should at least be able to trust that he won't be able to understand everything about you. He shouldn't be too selfish to take your word for it.

But if you've told him that it's not because you don't want to be intimate, that it's because of sensory problems instead, why is he still upset?

I like it and the intimacy that goes with it... I would not be compatible with a non-kisser, I'd feel empty from the lack of it.