Where am I in the 'league' system

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The_Funktasm
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15 May 2013, 2:10 am

uwmonkdm wrote:

You're inside of it, therefore you are losing.

This. The number system makes me want to strangle the average straight male. Where anyone gets off redirecting their insecurity into a system that dehumanizes people is beyond me.

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Ferrus91
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15 May 2013, 2:10 am

Tyri0n wrote:

Skinny arms and chunky torso. I think the opposite looks better on both men and women.

Well most of my torso is not fat anyway, it is mostly ribcage and some muscle. I do a lot of hiking so my legs, and body (where I carry a rucksack) are disproportionately exercised compared to my arms. I think a better opinion, if what you say is true, is building up my arms rather than losing weight per se as losing weight wont actually get rid of the torso.

auntblabby wrote:

my top is thinner and my middle is thicker and my bottom is bottoming out. :oops:

despite my best efforts. but if I go bald I will invest in a quality wig. but the OP does not look bad. he just needs to find the right person for him, and in a nation of 300+ million, he is sure to encounter over his lifetime, at least a few. but he may have to be much more patient than he is.

I am in Britain actually, so divide that number by 5.

The_Funktasm wrote:

uwmonkdm wrote:

You're inside of it, therefore you are losing.

This. The number system makes me want to strangle the average straight male. Where anyone gets off redirecting their insecurity into a system that dehumanizes people is beyond me.

It is biology though. Ever noticed pigeons go for mates of roughly the same attractiveness?

The_Face_of_Boo
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15 May 2013, 2:18 am

Ferrus91 wrote:

So, I would like a definitive answer of where I am in the league system that seems a pretty rigid if unspoken law in dating.

This is my picture:

The reason I ask is because in August last year there was a girl who was interested in me, however she was fairly obese (BMI 35-36). Now, although I was friendly I did not find her physically attractive at all, so I didn't reciprocate. However I am starting to wonder now if by doing so I was effectively blocking out people from my own league and therefore making it impossible to have a date, and that I should find ways of trying to make myself more attracted to obese women. Also, am I best off not even thinking about those more average to slightly lower than average girls I am usually attracted to?

To be honest, obese/overweight girls are often nicer and more generous (except one who was total b****, she got a stomach surgery to get thinner later, she was obsessed to be thin), I dunno why, but they often are.

Thin girls are more likely to be....well...mean.

It's not I am saying most thin girls are mean but the correlation goes like this: most mean girls I've encountered were thin with nice body, while most of the overweight girls were nice and gentle.

auntblabby
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15 May 2013, 2:19 am

Ferrus91 wrote:

It is biology though. Ever noticed pigeons go for mates of roughly the same attractiveness?

all my life the people who looked at the same level as me gave me the bum's rush or ignored me totally. until recently.

auntblabby
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15 May 2013, 2:21 am

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

most mean girls I've encountered were thin with nice body, while most of the overweight girls were nice and gentle.

for the most part, the former category described above, never felt any pressure [never had any need] to develop the nice parts of their personalities, in general.

The_Funktasm
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15 May 2013, 2:28 am

Ferrus91 wrote:

Tyri0n wrote:

Skinny arms and chunky torso. I think the opposite looks better on both men and women.

auntblabby wrote:

my top is thinner and my middle is thicker and my bottom is bottoming out. :oops:

I am in Britain actually, so divide that number by 5.

The_Funktasm wrote:

uwmonkdm wrote:

You're inside of it, therefore you are losing.

This. The number system makes me want to strangle the average straight male. Where anyone gets off redirecting their insecurity into a system that dehumanizes people is beyond me.

It is biology though. Ever noticed pigeons go for mates of roughly the same attractiveness?

If anyone would buy that, then by all means have your shallow relationships. Be a set of numbers and nothing more. Keep your glass ceiling of potential, and keep putting yourself in an arbitrary social caste. [/sarcasm]

Ferrus91
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15 May 2013, 3:36 am

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

Well, there might be some truth to that, and to be truthful I have no issue with girls that are just overweight, I mean like BMI 25-29... it is obesity that I find difficult.

Kinme
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15 May 2013, 4:40 am

Different hairstyle and maybe cleanly shaven. You look nice, otherwise.

Popsicle
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15 May 2013, 5:02 am

I don't think you need to lose weight but the photo does you no favors. As I've said to others in the same types of threads, a selfie makes you look like you have no friends. It says "I can't even get one person I know to stand near me for two seconds and take my photo."

Also the photo is too dark. Lighten it and make it more vibrant or slightly saturated. You're wearing red but it all looks gray.

Looks wise I would say about average to slightly above.

I don't believe in forcing yourself to be attracted to something you are not naturally attracted to. My only objection is when people are rude to people they find unattractive (including behind their backs on public websites, thinking it's just the guys reading it.) But you have no obligation to date people you don't want to date.

blue_bean
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15 May 2013, 6:58 am

Why is it only looks that determine which league you're in? Why don't people ever take an honest look at themselves as an overall package?

If a woman is obese or fat, you may consider her out of your league looks wise but if she has a better personality, is a better person and has achieved more in life she's leagues above you.

Ferrus91
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15 May 2013, 7:13 am

blue_bean wrote:

If a woman is obese or fat, you may consider her out of your league looks wise but if she has a better personality, is a better person and has achieved more in life she's leagues above you.

That's true. Well I have a masters degree and an okay job, so I'm not a shut-in failure or anything.

The point is more not that I couldn't imagine being friends or getting on with someone. It is more just that I find obesity physically unappealing to the point where I would rather not have sex, so I suppose if it were a celibate relationship it would work. Like I said merely being fat would not be an issue at all.

DialAForAwesome
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15 May 2013, 9:53 am

blue_bean wrote:

Why is it only looks that determine which league you're in? Why don't people ever take an honest look at themselves as an overall package?

Because there is no need to. This is a shallow world, governed by shallow people. A so-called "ugly" person could be the most personable guy or girl in the world, and it won't mean jack.

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fueledbycoffee
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15 May 2013, 10:13 am

If you're desperate to stick to the number system, I'd say a five or a six. However, I don't much care for the number system, myself. I will give you some suggestions, though.

Don't bother with losing weight. Put on some muscle. Pushups, situps, lifting, whatever. Upper body exercises, since you say you hike. Shave, but not completely. Definitely the neck and upper cheeks, at least. Given the shape of your head, grow out a Van Dyke. It's add length to your face. Definitely get either a close haircut, or grow it out. Definitely ditch the watch. People use phones to check the time now, so the watch is unnecessary and a bit of an anachronism. And pick up a leather jacket, a blazer or something. It looks good with the t-shirt/jeans combo.

The_Funktasm
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15 May 2013, 10:13 am

DialAForAwesome wrote:

blue_bean wrote:

Why is it only looks that determine which league you're in? Why don't people ever take an honest look at themselves as an overall package?

Because there is no need to. This is a shallow world, governed by shallow people. A so-called "ugly" person could be the most personable guy or girl in the world, and it won't mean jack.

When you date as*holes.

ITT: We pretend everyone that's the same gender is exactly the same person or ugly and frack reality because reality isn't depressing enough.

or at least that's what I'm picking up...

DialAForAwesome
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15 May 2013, 10:43 am

The_Funktasm wrote:

DialAForAwesome wrote:

blue_bean wrote:

Why is it only looks that determine which league you're in? Why don't people ever take an honest look at themselves as an overall package?

Because there is no need to. This is a shallow world, governed by shallow people. A so-called "ugly" person could be the most personable guy or girl in the world, and it won't mean jack.

It's not just "as*holes" who do this either.

Have fun in your fantasy world. But you'll learn soon.

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The_Funktasm
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15 May 2013, 10:50 am

DialAForAwesome wrote:

The_Funktasm wrote:

DialAForAwesome wrote:

blue_bean wrote:

Why is it only looks that determine which league you're in? Why don't people ever take an honest look at themselves as an overall package?

Because there is no need to. This is a shallow world, governed by shallow people. A so-called "ugly" person could be the most personable guy or girl in the world, and it won't mean jack.

It's not just "as*holes" who do this either.

Have fun in your fantasy world. But you'll learn soon.

Yes, I live in a fantasy world when most of you are defining "people" and projecting from here to the moon. Really?

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