should women hide their feelings?

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Yes, and my point is that rejections can make you feel you acted against what was expected of you, too, as a man. Just because someone rejects you, perhaps admonishing you in the process for your behavior, you shouldn’t limit your possibilities by assuming the next person you’d want to ask out agrees.

Rejection does suck, but I just can't relate to all the handwringing about it on this thread. F*** gender roles. If you want something, go for it. If it doesn't work out, then better luck next time. It seems like many people hinge their self esteem on how they're accepted(or not) by other people. Why put that much power in the hands of (sometimes) relative strangers? I've both pursued potential dates and have been the recipient of pursuit, but under no circumstances did the outcome affect my value as a person or theirs. Modern society is also rendering traditional gender roles more and more meaningless, unless you're a Fox News contributor. If someone is that invested in some type of game play for dating, then they want the game more than the person. I think most of the anguish I see is from people thinking they're going to change or mold their object of interest into what works for them.

Sorry, In reflection, I can totally see how my comments were entirely over the top (assuming I am one of the people you're referring to), and I regret making them. Actually, I can see how these are issues related to styles of attachment, as opposed to hard-and-fast 'rules' for everyone. I've had a bit of a light bulb moment recently, realising I've had a bad habit of funnelling my anxieties into dating. Generally speaking, I think if you honor/respect yourself and are self-aware enough then hand-wringing can certainly be avoided. It's actually rather basic. I think people suffering these kinds of anxieties might want to consider if they are struggling with anxious-preoccupied attachment or even BPD. Also consider basic incompatibilities who you're pursuing. People who run hot and cold and avoid intimacy are probably best avoided if you tend to get anxious.

Rejection does suck, but I just can't relate to all the handwringing about it on this thread. F*** gender roles. If you want something, go for it. If it doesn't work out, then better luck next time. It seems like many people hinge their self esteem on how they're accepted(or not) by other people. Why put that much power in the hands of (sometimes) relative strangers? I've both pursued potential dates and have been the recipient of pursuit, but under no circumstances did the outcome affect my value as a person or theirs. Modern society is also rendering traditional gender roles more and more meaningless, unless you're a Fox News contributor. If someone is that invested in some type of game play for dating, then they want the game more than the person. I think most of the anguish I see is from people thinking they're going to change or mold their object of interest into what works for them.