Still a lonely heart!

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A girlfriend of mine thinks that I'm not a good listener and I would get into one-sided conversations with her. The problem is that I have mild autism (high functioning autism) and that's one of those problems that is very hard to get over. Single ladies on FB, would you still date me even if I seem to not listen to you only because I have Asperger's or Mild Autism?

I caught myself doing this all the time, im really not interested in other people, the trick is to learn to pretend if you actually cant be interested... i actually found since i got better at listening i got more interested in the people.

I have the same problem. I've been told I really need to work on it, and it's very alienating. The thing is I don't even notice the conversation is one sided. Anyway, when I'm trying to have a good conversation with someone, I think of questions to ask *before* I start talking to them. Granted, I never get to them all, but it really helps. Asking questions seems to be the way to go when trying to make the conversation less one sided. And, I don't think the girl will just stop talking to you or anything because of this. Try to work on it, though. Most people get really bored and irritated if it's conversation after conversation of the same thing.

It's posts like this that make me feel like punching myself in the nuts. Seriously.

I actually get the exact opposite - people say i'm a very good listener, and often come to me for advice/to talk about their feelings/problems etc. I always make sure that i come off as understanding to the people i talk to, it's important for me to make people feel like i'm "there". Things you can do to express this: Ask questions (for example a question that summarizes something they told you, which leaves them noticing that you've been all ears to their words, and are interested in knowing more) eye contact (even if uncomfortable sometimes this does make people feel like you are more present in the conversation), Occasionally nod and express ("wow", "really?", "I can imagine that's difficult..").

My grandmother have difficulties appearing as a good listener.. I used to get really annoyed at this as a kid, and would many times actually end up taking it personally, sometimes even tearing up, or getting angry at her for not seeming present whenever i told her something difficult to me or opened up. Makes me wonder if she has Aspergers to xP Though she doesn't really have any other Aspie traits besides that so i doubt it.

You kinda aren't even dating someone if you aren't listening to them... kinda just like having a sex doll lol

So true.

Pretty interesting.

What the OP is describing is the main social deficit of Asperger's/HFA. One-sided and not appearing to be interested/listening is the most common manifestation of AS.

It'd be interesting to see what the majority of females say in response to his question.