So do Most Women on the ASD Spectrum Conform?

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Don't compromise yourself to "bag" a husband. Just as I've said about this PUA (Pick-up Artist) stuff, pretending to be someone you are not may get you into a relationship but then you either have to keep up the charade for the rest of your life (or until they die) or you will be found out and they will resent you for faking it all.

If you want to change anything, just work on yourself; don't try to change your personality, but explore the things you are passionate about. It will make you a more interesting person to converse with, and you will be more full of life and passion: certainly attractive qualities in a wife, to a real man.

It wouldn't hurt to work on your outer image as well, although I don't advocate taking this to the extreme.

kate123A wrote:
Sorry not much help


On the contrary, I think your post is very helpful. It demonstrates very well the problem with living a lie. I'm sorry to hear about what you went through, but I do hope it discourages others from "getting married at any cost", as they're pressured to in some cultures. I think the attitude expressed by EmberEyes and (somewhat more forcefully ) by Kjas is much healthier.

The sad thing is I didn't realize how much of myself I was covering up and convinced myself as well. Husband is either going to make it work with me and have to accept me for who I really am or we will end up divorced.

In some lights I guess you could say I conform, because to do otherwise just seems to say "look at me!". I also can be sensitive to criticism.
On the other hand, I'm not pretending to be someone who I'm not. That ability is probably beyond me anyway, but I've never had that urge.

I never try to fake who I am in order to get a relationship.I am not even able to do it.Maybe it`s good,because I don`t want to end up like kate123a(kate you know on what I`m thinking on,you know a topic on adult section).I do not know,I have no idea,what other people want from me.But one thing I`m sure:I want to be with someone who accepts me who I am.Sometimes I think I`m destined to be a crazy cat lady,to die alone and no one will notice.But sometimes I read about woman who are married,who have a boyfriend,but who are bad people,who abuse their children,and then I feel happy because I`m a better person than them.I really don`t understand this`get married at any cost`concept.Love is something beautiful,but man who doesn`t like your personality doesn`t like you.Call me an idealist maybe,but I want true love.But I just don`t see anyone who wants to be with me.But having a boyfriend is not everything in life.But television and media say different.Everyone says that is easier for AS woman to get in a relationship,but I think that for us is even more difficult.I want someone who will know everything about me,who will love everything mine.Ewerywhere I go,I see only a bunch of arrogant jerks who are so stupid and boring and rude.No one was never attracted to me,I was never attracted to anyone.