What is wrong with me?

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I will respond with a PM.

Thanks. I would really appreciate this.

check your inbox.

There are something like 4 billion women in the world.. thats a lot. I guarantee you there are more out there, likely somewhere near where you live, that you will share a spark with, as long as you open yourself up to the possibility of it.

I know what you're feeling.. I've felt it myself. I wasn't able to deal with that until after I had had a series of good casual dating relationships (man that took a long time to figure out...). That may or may not work in your case, but trying it out might help give you some perspective.

Sounds like a soulmate.

I thought soulmates were always like two peas in a pod.

It's nothing like that. She's just trying to eat healthy is all.

You know if you didn't have those feelings it would be a great friendship. Or if she also had feelings for you it might be a relationship. But its neither. It is time to move on. Staying around will accomplish nothing but delay you getting over this.

I'm only going to say this once: cutting her out of my life, even temporarily, IS NOT AN OPTION. Yes, I feel like shtako because unrequited love sucks. And yes, I have occasionally felt a tad suicidal ( only to shrug it off because she's my reason to live ). But as bad as I feel, as unbearable as the pain I feel is...not getting to see her, hang out with her, hug her, talk to her & simply be there for her would feel far worse. Most of my friends moved out of state and the only other ones in town rarely if ever call or visit, and she's always there for me. Sure, I'll probably die pining for her...but I can live with that. Why would anybody want a worthless loser like me when they could have literally ANYBODY else? Maybe love will grow, maybe nothing will ever happen...but ffs people the possibility, however slim, that we could be together is the last atom of hope I have left...

the only thing that keeps me going [lacking suitable mate] is the fact that I cannot handle being somebody's conditional love interest - the suspense of not knowing what will be a conditional "deal breaker" is not a good thing, and i'd rather do without that drama.

I read somewhere that when you discover a soulmate, it can be like you already know them, and you get an almost eerie feeling about them. I've had that once (and I was freaked out by it) but I'm not sure the other person felt the same.

I'm not so sure I believe in soulmates anymore.

^^^
I get the impression that for it to be a true soulmate that such an inexorable feeling has to be just as strong with both parties. if it is just one party feeling this, likely it is just limerence.

For me, a soulmate is someone who both of us enjoy being with each other, even during saying nothing. I also don't like relationship that goes up and down like roller coaster. With my avoidant personality traits, someone who I can be trusted that the relationship will last no matter what I said wrong or did wrong, which means that a consistent and stable person that are attracted to me for just being me, not attracted to something in me that wouldn't last.

^^^
such dependable people are far and few between. I wish you luck in finding such a person.

I had a romantic attraction, but it would have meant the world to me if he had just wanted to be friends with me. I didn't need my feelings reciprocated, I just wanted to be around him. He did actually reciprocate in the beginning, but I think I hurt his feelings, and probably appeared a bit mad.

As for soulmates...apparently each person has several, although they can come in forms like family and friends.

Auntblabby, what do you believe?

if you don't mind [PM me if you wish], could you tell me in general terms how you hurt him? just curious. I believe there are different categories of soul mate- some familial, some romantic, and not all lifetimes will have romantic soulmates. I don't believe my life this go-round has any romantic soulmates. apparently [was just dumped] am not much of a partner for anybody, am too clueless and slow on the uptake, am not able to read minds well. 'tis just as well. IOW I have recent experience with what was quite likely a limerent type of relationship which I thought was mutual love. I probably appear a bit mad to many people I encounter in the course of a day when I have to be out and about.