how do I look?

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You look okay to me. Maybe stand up straight a bit more--posture is important.

I'm 5 foot 4 3/4; I can't get away with not standing up straight.

well, on a positive note, im glad women like us anyways.

You should wait until you don't have zit/pimples on your face before taking pics.

When I worked in IT, most of the guys in my office had a similar look to you. They all seemed to find women who loved them. I'd say you look average, but that's not a bad thing. Like that line from Pulp Fiction, "Personality goes a long way!"

mangled? O.o

I am losing weight have lost 13 pounds in under 2 months. as for my face its not fat as it's always been like that since birthish.. perhaps I just have a chubby face can't afford plastic surgery unfortunately.



didn't mean it as complaining. suppose it would have been better if I asked how attractive I am or how do i look. most people have called me ugly including reddit people so I phrased it that way.

unfortunately not I find most women really gorgeous. out of 3000 ish(don't keep track so hard to know) women i've looked at and or massaged/massaged by. I would say only perhaps 10-15 I found unattractive. only been contacted by like 6 who I found unattractive, and been on a date with only 1 who i did. the others who I found attractive were 1. not compatible or 2. listed on their profile about how they don't like guys like me. so I not sure why they would like/message me.

if it was based on looks alone. I could be with like 95% of the female population. I don't get how guys say some of these women are unattractive.


not asking for pity. I don't get how its ok for others to ask how they look but when I do it, its looking for pity. so what about all those women on facebook and reddit asking?



I'm guessing since I didn't post body shots everyone is basing the weight thing off my face. the problem is that is how chubby my face has always been. when I lost weight in the past it still looked like that so no fixing it besides surgery

also I know quite a few people who are like 3 times the size I am and they have families. o.O

I'm not like my thinner marine friend, but I'm also not a whole lot bigger then him besides being taller and what comes with that.

beards are ok, the reason I don't shave is shaving is what caused the stuff on my face that I've been battling with getting rid of since 2003. cut myself a few times and it spreaded. I put neosporin on every day and its healing up again, but I had seemed to got rid of them in 2009 only to stop putting neosporin on(couldn't see where to put it) and have it come back. I get some pimples from stress but they go away after a week or so. doctor won't give me a prescription for better stuff and I can't afford the over the counter things.

I cut my own hair, use to buzz cut it. until I get a job and fix my money problems I can't afford to pay $15 every week or so. as is I don't know if I'll afford the gas to get to job stuff. beards going have to go though as security has to look straight and well dressed to show a presence.

my sister picked out my over shirts and said they looked good. have tan, 2 greys, blue, red, orange and black. its really hard to find 4xl shirts in my area. I'm a 2xl but I have to wear baggy shirts to cover my EDC. just got a new over coat(cost $50 ouch) bit baggy too, but the arms on it are the right length. My arm length doesn't seem to match my chest size or are the sleeves suppose to get pulled up your arm when you bend them? really irritating feeling.

I try to shower everyday/every other day, except this week where I have been super down. been using axe stuff cost a bit more but seems to work a lot better and I like the smell. brush my teeth 2-3 times a day, use orbit gum when I can't and 2 different kinds of mouthwash.

do I look unclean in the pictures?

sadly I've had them since I got out of highschool. most aren't zit/pimples as they go away fast, but cuts/sunburns. I actually didn't have any when I was younger, stupid shaving.

teddy bear is good?

but without looks how do I get them to spend enough time with me to see my personality and humour. whether I get a date or not is based on looks/job and without going on a date they won't see my personality.

don't like photos. but took this one today. to show how better the marks have gotten.

http://i112.photobucket.com/albums/n173 ... G_0900.jpg

coat/jacket i got for winter. fleece under jacket and a water resistant coat with fleece lining. also got black fleece gloves and my sister is going crocet me a hat.

http://i112.photobucket.com/albums/n173 ... G_0901.jpg

http://i112.photobucket.com/albums/n173 ... G_0902.jpg

Your cat is so cute! <3

I mean, right, back on topic. I dunno if anyone else mentioned this, but the majority of the pictures seem to have this odd fishbowl effect to them, which can make even models look unattractive. You're not ugly. Honest. You just need to take more flattering pictures! Which means experimenting. With a camera.

I'm not sure why you're getting a lot of fat comments, but don't worry about that. And don't don't don't do the fasting thing somebody suggested. That's not good. Don't do that to yourself. I can sympathize with having a round face, mine is pretty round too, but on the plus side your cute round face with the smile makes you look more approachable.^^

I doubt it's your looks holding you back. So have a bit more confidence in them! Unless, of course, you wanna redo your fashion wardrobe. Then I'd say go for it! Because who doesn't like clothes that make you feel pretty? I mean handsome.

Nice jacket!

speak for urself, i am a male but look feminine and pretty so that doesn't apply to me.

as to the OP, i'm gunna be honest, not great. (we're supposed to be honest as autistics right?)
but u can always just set the bar lower. we all have our different standards.

Oh no you don't look unclean, I was just giving you some pointers.

When I was younger I dressed very much like a boy, I had bad acne and have always been a bit chubby. I never knew how to be girly, I had two older brothers so I just learned from them. It wasn't until I was about 20 that I started to learn how to be more feminine, a kind friend of mine took me aside and gave me pointers about hair, clothing, make up, and how to shave and groom myself. It was only then that I started to make a real effort, I was below poverty poor but I used what I could to make the best out of what I had, like for instance altering my own clothing by sewing it myself into more flattering designs.

I just thought that if I shared some of my pointers with you that maybe you would have the success I did. I never in my life had a boyfriend until I changed some things about myself, nowadays I am 8 years married. Once I started to really learn what makes me attractive I got more attention.

I also have pretty bad eczema and acne from stress, I learned to maintain it with removing certain foods that can trigger it like dairy and grains, I use cetaphil daily face cleanser and using a tiny smaller than a pea-sized amount of virgin coconut oil as a moisturizer. I still get pimples and eczema once and a while but not nearly as bad as I did before. Oh and vitamins make a big difference especially vitamin D3, Omega 3's, and vitamin C.


I only gave you some tips because it seems you may not feel good about yourself or confidant that you can get a mate if you have to ask us if you are attractive. If you were successful in dating and had a higher self esteem you wouldn't need to ask. I figured I could help you with the tools to feel better about yourself.

You do not have to take my advice at all, you are free to live your life how you choose, it is of course all up to you. I just thought I would share my advice as someone once did for me.

yesh unfortunately she doesn't like me anymore.

fishbowl effect?

like using the effects? I use phone camera as its not too much lower mp then my camera and allows me to take pictures of me while seeing what is in the picture.

cute face?

I like my clothes I wish I could afford more pants so I didn't have to wear the same pair for days in a row. but pants cost $30 a pair

had a lady smile at me at store other day when she walked by. I don't know while, maybe she scared?

Edit:
also not doing the fasting thing. I am on a calorie counter and limited to 1900 calories instead of whatever I was eating(probably like 3000) I feel hungry almost all the time and it drives me crazy, so not going do no fasting.

Last edited by sly279 on 23 Nov 2014, 8:21 pm, edited 1 time in total.

I didn't mean to come off as unaccepting if I did. I just try to adress all the points from posts in replies as not to be rude.

I've done as much as I can now to change myself. spending. huge amount of my money on clothes(something I don't normally do) starving myself to lose weight. buying better shampoo/deoderant.

I'm trying to get the best paying job I can regardless of my happiness/safty.

even still I feel depressed like it won't and doesn't change anything and the goal post just keeps getting moved.

Fasting won't help because your metabolism will slow down and you end up putting on weight when you break the fast.

Is ephedrine available where you live? I take it off and on, and when I'm taking it I find it helps with reducing appetite while keeping your metabolism high. Body builders will take ephedrine and caffeine together because they have synergistic effects, together they raise your metabolism more than either would alone and with less jitteryness, increase in heart rate or other negative side-effects compared to a dose of only caffeine or only ephedrine with the same metabolic effect.