Broken Roads

Post Reply New Topic

I'm 29 years old. Single and looking.

My parents have been married for almost 30 years. My dad's parents just celebrated their 50th anniversary this month. My parents and grandparents are a big part of who I am, and have done exponentially more for me than other members of my family. When I look at who I want to be as a parent, I look at them because they've been doing it for so long while staying together strong.

Both my parents and grandparents married at 20. Both sets dated during high school. I have never dated, and thus I break such a cycle.

If and when I get in a relationship, I'm looking to keep this relationship going indefinitely (none of those 3-month deals, etc.). In my particular area, within those in my age group, I'd say it's a 90-9-1 split. A large majority of women in my age group are happily together. The middle group consists of single women that have kids and are coming off of divorces, breakups, whatever. The <1% are those who are single and have never, or rarely, dated (like me).

Nine of every 10 single women I know have been down these "broken roads," as I like to call them. This is going to seem cruel, but I'm afraid to take a chance on these particular women, because 1) I fear that they'll just use me to get back on their right course, 2) I'll unknowingly remind them of some ex- in their lives, 3) this isn't a gradual transition from singledom to being a father figure to x-amount of children.

But this is what's around me. As I mentioned, I'm 29 years old. I work in the career field that I went to college for, and decided upon during my freshman year. I have my career pretty much set for a long time. I'm at where I want to be. I like to say that I live on a Non-Broken road.

Does this mean that I have to intentionally break my road in order to find the woman I love?

I'm just very confused right now.

Well where I am from, I estimate about 50% of people are single and I think it is supported by statistics. The challenge is actually finding someone who is interested or getting them interested.

But, to answer your question, do what feels right to you.

I agree with this. Do what feels right to you but also know that there will be risk. You can't be afraid of being hurt. You can't judge women too harshly if they have kids or not or based on their current or past path of life. Main thing is that you have to put yourself out there. Let women know when you are interested.

I agree with this too. I feel like sometimes people judge because of a persons lack of relationships, number of failed relationships, and overall what I call life experience. In your age group, it will be hard to find someone that has never been in a relationship.
I think experience in relationships is what could make one work. Also I'm not sure if your meaning of "broken road," is what others call baggage or damage goods. Either way, if it does mean that, then I believe no one is damaged goods. I think damaged means failuires and "failed relationships" creates personal grow to prevent the right relationship from failing. Life is all about taking chances.