Unknowableme wrote:
Hey guys, I am interested in a coworker who I am pretty sure is somewhere on the autism spectrum. Im an NT. I'm almost positive he likes me too, but I don't think he's going to be the one to ask me out, so I am wondering how I should do this. I've never initiated anything, not even friendship, and I would like some advice from the perspective of someone on the spectrum. I don't even have a real question about what I should be doing. Any advice you guys have, just throw it at me. Anything that is specific to someone with aspergers/autism? I am shy though, so keep that in mind. He tends to walk by me a lot but he avoids eye contact, so I'm not sure how I should get his attention.
Forget the typical NT mindset as best as you can. Be as direct as possible without innuendo or suggestion. There's not a signal you can send on Earth that'll make him initiate with you. Even if he notices, he'll likely confuse the gesture, and even if he doesn't, he'll likely second guess himself "no, that
couldn't be a signal
Hi, would you like to go on a date with me? Straight forward and blunt. Just expect the same back. Like almost always. Maybe ask him to help you with something to get his one on one attention and in the course of whetever it is you need help with, just drop the straightforward question. If he runs away it doesn't mean no. More likely a yes but OMG she asked me out I gotta run and evaluate...