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A tip for women who want to know who are their admirers.

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rdos
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28 Sep 2015, 9:56 am

Peacesells wrote:
rdos wrote:
Smart girls will fake a FB account, fill it with pictures of a super-hot model, sends a friend request from it to the guy that claims to admire her, and then if he takes the bait he is out. :mrgreen:

There is nothing wrong in wanting to know other girls, even if you like a girl. Especially if you are not sure of her feelings for you or if she hasn't shown any particular interest in you yet.


True, but if you truly admire her and are serious about your interest, then you won't go after other girls that are prettier / sexier when the opportunity shows up. It's a super-smart move that more girls should try. It exposes the gold-diggers in no time. :mrgreen:



Peacesells
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28 Sep 2015, 10:05 am

rdos wrote:
True, but if you truly admire her and are serious about your interest, then you won't go after other girls that are prettier / sexier when the opportunity shows up. It's a super-smart move that more girls should try. It exposes the gold-diggers in no time. :mrgreen:

That's the worst thing a guy could do. It's super stupid to completely devote yourself to someone who has never shown the slightest interest in you. Also I wouldn't really think good of a girl who expects a guy to devout himself completely to her without even showing him the slightest signal of interest. That's a poor choice of a girlfriend.



Last edited by Peacesells on 28 Sep 2015, 10:09 am, edited 1 time in total.

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28 Sep 2015, 10:06 am

Correction of English: A tip for women who want to know who their admirers are.


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The_Face_of_Boo
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28 Sep 2015, 10:16 am

DitavonTeeth wrote:
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
rdos wrote:
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
I am not talking about the FB scams.


FB scams? You mean that most guys are not seeking sex only? :lol:


It could be, many guys may want sex only, that's for the receiver to evaluate -

also some women want sex only without appearing desperate, so this tip can be useful for them in that regard.


My FB privacy settings tight, so only friends of friends and individuals who have my email address can message me. I don't think I've ever received a message from a complete stranger and more often than not the messages I do receive are from people I've met, however briefly, in IRL. I've yet to be propositioned over FB and would simply block any guy who tried right off the bat.

I also don't believe 90% of the messages I receive from male acquaintances are the result of romantic interest. The messages are mostly information acquisition-related (carpool to softball, address of new store or restaurant, etc) and many of the men are married or on committed relationships.

My advice to men who are interested, would be to pick up the phone and call the girl rather than send her a six word FB message in the hope that she somehow divines that as a sign of interest.


In general:
Men would find *any* excuse to initiate conversation with the woman subject of interest; we are socially expected and conditioned to approach women *indirectly* and subtly without revealing our initial motif.
You can't expect a guy to send you "Hey, I like you, let's date" - that applies on phone calls too.

That's because it's the only way that works; even women on dating sites always say that they would never reply to initial messages such as "Hey, I like your profile and I want to know you more" (direct dating interest) or "Hey babe, you're hot wanna f**k?" (direct sexual interest) even tho such messages are way more honest and direct than messages asking about something in profile like "Hi, I am Sam, I see that you are fan of author x, I read many of his books and I wanna read the abc one you mentioned, is it good?" or "Hi I am Sam, I liked your shoulder tattoo, what does it symbolize?" - I mean com on, amazon would give him the answer of the first one, and why he would even care about what some tattoo means, I highly doubt it's just for art; but it's the latter way which is socially accepted, not the former.

Those are all excuses to start conversations hopefully to lead to dating, guys do them because it's favored way by women - hence better chance.

Same thing on FB.



Last edited by The_Face_of_Boo on 28 Sep 2015, 10:18 am, edited 1 time in total.

kraftiekortie
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28 Sep 2015, 10:17 am

It's better to 'talk about stuff", "talk about life" than it is to talk sexually.



sly279
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28 Sep 2015, 10:24 am

rdos wrote:
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
And I often hear women talking about how much messages they receive from guys on FB; I am certain that over 90% of them are out of romantic interest.


Going by the experiences of daugther, I'm certain that 90% of them are for sexual interest only, and maybe 10% of them are out of romantic interest.


Dads always assume all guys want only sex from their daughters. They want to keep thief daughter in that innocent little girl they imaging she still is. So not sure I'd trust your percentages .



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28 Sep 2015, 10:27 am

DitavonTeeth wrote:
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
rdos wrote:
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
I am not talking about the FB scams.


FB scams? You mean that most guys are not seeking sex only? :lol:


It could be, many guys may want sex only, that's for the receiver to evaluate -

also some women want sex only without appearing desperate, so this tip can be useful for them in that regard.


My FB privacy settings tight, so only friends of friends and individuals who have my email address can message me. I don't think I've ever received a message from a complete stranger and more often than not the messages I do receive are from people I've met, however briefly, in IRL. I've yet to be propositioned over FB and would simply block any guy who tried right off the bat.

I also don't believe 90% of the messages I receive from male acquaintances are the result of romantic interest. The messages are mostly information acquisition-related (carpool to softball, address of new store or restaurant, etc) and many of the men are married or on committed relationships.

My advice to men who are interested, would be to pick up the phone and call the girl rather than send her a six word FB message in the hope that she somehow divines that as a sign of interest.


Younger people 15-30 now give out fb in place of phone numbers. Heck even the older people at my work do it. So like with the girl I was interested in she gave her fb I don't have a phone number to call not that I would phone calls make me super anxious.



kraftiekortie
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28 Sep 2015, 10:28 am

Most dads understand. They just don't want some sexual predator victimizing their daughters.

If you come across cool to the dad--If you listen to him, and talk to him like a person, he'll like you.

If you come across arrogant/rebellious, the dad won't like you...guaranteed.



DitavonTeeth
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28 Sep 2015, 11:17 am

sly279 wrote:
DitavonTeeth wrote:
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
rdos wrote:
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
I am not talking about the FB scams.


FB scams? You mean that most guys are not seeking sex only? :lol:


It could be, many guys may want sex only, that's for the receiver to evaluate -

also some women want sex only without appearing desperate, so this tip can be useful for them in that regard.


My FB privacy settings tight, so only friends of friends and individuals who have my email address can message me. I don't think I've ever received a message from a complete stranger and more often than not the messages I do receive are from people I've met, however briefly, in IRL. I've yet to be propositioned over FB and would simply block any guy who tried right off the bat.

I also don't believe 90% of the messages I receive from male acquaintances are the result of romantic interest. The messages are mostly information acquisition-related (carpool to softball, address of new store or restaurant, etc) and many of the men are married or on committed relationships.

My advice to men who are interested, would be to pick up the phone and call the girl rather than send her a six word FB message in the hope that she somehow divines that as a sign of interest.


Younger people 15-30 now give out fb in place of phone numbers. Heck even the older people at my work do it. So like with the girl I was interested in she gave her fb I don't have a phone number to call not that I would phone calls make me super anxious.


I guess it's a personal preference - if the guy in question has my number, I'd rather he call to ask me out because it shows initiative. Different strokes for different folks, I guess.



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28 Sep 2015, 11:58 am

kraftiekortie wrote:
Most dads understand. They just don't want some sexual predator victimizing their daughters.


I'm not entirely sure just interacting with them doesn't count as victimizing them.

I've read a lot of appalling views on this. They say dads know all boys are sex-crazed louts who need to be kept away from their daughters with a shotgun because they remember how they themselves were in their youth. I suppose you can't argue with that, but I remember how I was, too, and I couldn't have been farther from that stereotype.

I did know sex exists, mainly from science classes, but I didn't think of having sex with a girl when I saw her, no matter how much I liked her. I knew, theoretically, if I got close enough to her, it might come natural at some distant point in the future, but that wasn't the case yet by any stretch of the imagination. I felt quite uncomfortable when other boys reminded me I was supposed to wish I could just basically rape the girl.

Not that I'd expect anyone to believe me at this point. I have a funny tendency to be held as a prime example of widespread, perceived vices when I'm just about the one who least engages in them. You could also say I'd have behaved exactly like the other boys if I'd had the chance, but I know I really had no inclination to do so.


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28 Sep 2015, 12:06 pm

DitavonTeeth wrote:
sly279 wrote:
DitavonTeeth wrote:
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
rdos wrote:
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
I am not talking about the FB scams.


FB scams? You mean that most guys are not seeking sex only? :lol:


It could be, many guys may want sex only, that's for the receiver to evaluate -

also some women want sex only without appearing desperate, so this tip can be useful for them in that regard.


My FB privacy settings tight, so only friends of friends and individuals who have my email address can message me. I don't think I've ever received a message from a complete stranger and more often than not the messages I do receive are from people I've met, however briefly, in IRL. I've yet to be propositioned over FB and would simply block any guy who tried right off the bat.

I also don't believe 90% of the messages I receive from male acquaintances are the result of romantic interest. The messages are mostly information acquisition-related (carpool to softball, address of new store or restaurant, etc) and many of the men are married or on committed relationships.

My advice to men who are interested, would be to pick up the phone and call the girl rather than send her a six word FB message in the hope that she somehow divines that as a sign of interest.


Younger people 15-30 now give out fb in place of phone numbers. Heck even the older people at my work do it. So like with the girl I was interested in she gave her fb I don't have a phone number to call not that I would phone calls make me super anxious.


I guess it's a personal preference - if the guy in question has my number, I'd rather he call to ask me out because it shows initiative. Different strokes for different folks, I guess.


You expect him to call you and tell you "Hi, can we have a drink together?" ?

It won't happen anymore.



rdos
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28 Sep 2015, 12:09 pm

Peacesells wrote:
rdos wrote:
True, but if you truly admire her and are serious about your interest, then you won't go after other girls that are prettier / sexier when the opportunity shows up. It's a super-smart move that more girls should try. It exposes the gold-diggers in no time. :mrgreen:

That's the worst thing a guy could do. It's super stupid to completely devote yourself to someone who has never shown the slightest interest in you. Also I wouldn't really think good of a girl who expects a guy to devout himself completely to her without even showing him the slightest signal of interest. That's a poor choice of a girlfriend.


I think our definitions of "admirer" differs. To me an admirer is somebody that is serious in his/her interest, and not a jerk seeking sex or to fulfill narcissistic needs.

Thus, in order to reach that status there must be some kind of interaction and mutual signals of possible interest.



rdos
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28 Sep 2015, 12:29 pm

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
Men would find *any* excuse to initiate conversation with the woman subject of interest; we are socially expected and conditioned to approach women *indirectly* and subtly without revealing our initial motif.
You can't expect a guy to send you "Hey, I like you, let's date" - that applies on phone calls too.


Not me. I never start with talking or online conversations. Those are entrances to standard dating, which I'd never involve in as it is a highly inefficient means of finding suitable mates.



rdos
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28 Sep 2015, 12:36 pm

sly279 wrote:
rdos wrote:
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
And I often hear women talking about how much messages they receive from guys on FB; I am certain that over 90% of them are out of romantic interest.


Going by the experiences of daugther, I'm certain that 90% of them are for sexual interest only, and maybe 10% of them are out of romantic interest.


Dads always assume all guys want only sex from their daughters. They want to keep thief daughter in that innocent little girl they imaging she still is. So not sure I'd trust your percentages .


Umm, no. You cannot imagine the number of guys that will ask for sex either in their first or second message. When daughter showed me these messages from jerks I just said "block them", and so she did. Nowadays she does it all by herself.



DitavonTeeth
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28 Sep 2015, 12:59 pm

rdos wrote:
Peacesells wrote:
rdos wrote:
True, but if you truly admire her and are serious about your interest, then you won't go after other girls that are prettier / sexier when the opportunity shows up. It's a super-smart move that more girls should try. It exposes the gold-diggers in no time. :mrgreen:

That's the worst thing a guy could do. It's super stupid to completely devote yourself to someone who has never shown the slightest interest in you. Also I wouldn't really think good of a girl who expects a guy to devout himself completely to her without even showing him the slightest signal of interest. That's a poor choice of a girlfriend.


I think our definitions of "admirer" differs. To me an admirer is somebody that is serious in his/her interest, and not a jerk seeking sex or to fulfill narcissistic needs.

Thus, in order to reach that status there must be some kind of interaction and mutual signals of possible interest.


I disagree. Admiration can absolutely go one-way. I think it's a prelude to asking someone out. It's silly and pointless to seriously, exclusively admire one person before you've so much as asked them out.

Besides, how "serious" can you be about someone you haven't yet been out with, let alone mutually agreed to date exclusively?

Unless and until you're at the "exclusive dating" stage of a relationship, both parties are free to admire and even casually date whomever (and however many people) they please.

As a side note, there will always be someone hotter, prettier/handsome-er, richer and smarter than you (and than the person you are dating or in an exclusive relationship with). There always have been and always will be. It hasn't yet stopped mankind from finding love.



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28 Sep 2015, 1:01 pm

rdos wrote:
I think our definitions of "admirer" differs. To me an admirer is somebody that is serious in his/her interest, and not a jerk seeking sex or to fulfill narcissistic needs.

You started talking about sex here while I was talking about romantic interests, so don't spit at me such ridiculous and unmotivated accusations, binky boy.
Quote:
Thus, in order to reach that status there must be some kind of interaction and mutual signals of possible interest.

Infact I agree with you on this, if they've been showing mutual interests they should not look around for another partner. Still they can add people to FB...



Last edited by Peacesells on 28 Sep 2015, 1:11 pm, edited 1 time in total.