Amount of effort required for men to be appealing

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It was the way you worded it..."why would I?" as though the answer is obvious and of course you wouldn't want to. "I don't want to date someone that has wrinkles and gray hair" would be much less harsh towards people with wrinkles and grey hair, as it makes it clear it is your personal preference, which is fine.

The grammar and semantics police are still in full force round these parts, I see.

I just disagree with statements like 'Women are relatively slim' or 'Attractive by default', we come in all different shapes and size, we all have to deal with different problems or feel pressured because we are part of a society that looks down on certain things, unruly hair, moustaches, hairy legs etc and we have to deal with criticism and body shaming as well. As a female, my routine can take up my entire day or I usually run late for my dates because I want to look my best for my man, so we feel under pressure to impress the opposite gender too, not to mention our razors, toiletries and trips to the salon costing more than men and even the extra investments and maintenance around 'That time of the month' which is usually taboo to discuss around the opposite gender.

Just like guys, us women sweat our butts off in the gym, at home or a fitness class and it can take months or even years of doing this to see the results. Also having to diet and eat smaller portions when you really just want to pick up some chocolate cake, we go through it.

I also notice how a lot of men say they prefer a girl who is natural and doesn't cake on too much make-up, my opinion of that is make-up simply enhances features that were already beautiful, you still have the same face, if it is used right but I work on a beauty course and so many girls are now just self reliant on make-up to feel good, I know I spend up to an hour on my make-up because it covers up my dark circles and any break outs, we really do feel a great need for it, if I have pretty eyes or well shaped eyebrows, I don't like people talking about my spots and imperfections, which people can do when we have the courage to be seen bare faced.

I love a well dressed man, a man with good hygiene, who also keeps himself healthy but I appreciate it more when the real effort goes into his character. A guy doesn't have to have a ripped body or be a model to attract a decent or genuine girl, keep clean and healthy sure, take care of yourself awesome, but it's not all about the physical assets, at least for me.

There are men who may take a quite a few hours to get ready, I won't deny that, but men are lucky in the sense that they get their hair cuts and toiletries cheaper, they don't have to worry about their time of the month which is extra investments and maintenance and they aren't required to shave every hair on their body like girls are, beards are considered attractive and manly and they can get a trim for £4 over in the UK, a hair cut for £10 but women are expected to remove facial hair so may have to pay out £20 to have their full face threaded or spend hundreds on hair cuts, blow dries and extensions.

Being a girl is equally if not more difficult.

You haven't disproven you're attractive by default; you've only confirmed merely being attractive is far from being enough for you. In contrast, men have to work hard to have any attractiveness at all.

^What about guys who are handsome or bishonen?

Women aren't attractive by default. You're thinking of the women you find attractive.



They don't. They really, really don't.

lol no
What kind of place do you live in where ALL women are seen as attractive?? Its definitely not that were here >>
Some of you guys must really be staying way too much inside (i guess thats no surprise in this kind of site tho) if you think EVERY SINGLE WOMEN is seen as attractive by sociaty
And you also have no idea how much the women you see goes through to look attractive

Like you can word things any better? You could have said something like "Maybe some day you might meet someone with gray hair and wrinkles who you really get along with." I wouldn't have thought anything about that comment, but no, you had to talk down to me and add in some stupid eye roll for emphasis. Like I said, take it somewhere else because I'm not going to put up with that crap.

If I don't start losing weight, I'll have to really work hard to give off the appearance of a semblance of attractiveness.

Women really can go through a lot to be beautiful. Most have unibrows and mustaches and have to tweeze it off, or body hair which they have to shave because the media promotes all these skinny women with hairless bodies. Not every woman is like that, we get skin problems, weight problems, unwanted hair and many issues. Ladies get criticised on their looks as well, fat shamed, everyone actually has different opinions on what is attractive. Some of us can embarassed to talk about body hair, facial hair, periods etc to guys, all the extra stuff we deal with so some women will only show what they want them to see. Women who put all the effort in filter pictures on instagram, diet and exercise for months and months, blur their imperfections with make up, get rid of unwanted hair, put together their outfits and spend a good amount of money on beauty products. A lot goes into acheiving that attractiveness. I think there are advantages and disadvantages for both genders, but from a girl's point of view I'm very passionate about the effort I put in and other females, it's incredible and it's not easy at all.

The majority of people in the typical gym are not going to be trained athletes or have any desire to be, many are in the gym for vanity or health reasons. You need to go to a specialist gym or calisthenics group if you want to make comparisons between yourself and others.

I do not see it as a competition or as a right to judge others unless it is a competition or a specific event. Physical fitness is a personal goal and journey, it is up to the individual and the type of training that they want to pursue and how they choose to do it.

^You're right. I'm not exactly judging them. It's just a waste of time in my opinion because they probably aren't going to get the results they want.

Usually it's just young men. I wouldn't myself want to waste my time on something that won't give me the results I'm looking for.

I guess most people take a more casual approach to working out. I have no intention of competing. I want to look good, be strong, be healthy, and feel good as a result.

I used to work out quite a bit. I never achieved "results" per se (except that I lost weight).

I think of working out as a vehicle to make sure I'm healthy, and I don't develop things like Type II Diabetes. I want to make sure I'm able to run up the subway steps without being too winded!

I haven't worked out recently--and I've gained a little weight--but I will, soon.

DoesItMatter, Callmesisixoxo - I see you're both new here. Hello!

Just a heads-up that, as you've already seen, there's some men who've not had much luck with dating or relationships and, for them, this is the only story in town.

Certainly within dating and relationships, and quite possibly in the world at large, no-one has it as hard as them. Indeed, not only are other people's problems - specifically, the difficulties women face - not as bad as theirs, but they don't even qualify as problems. As far as they are concerned, women have it easy - not just easier, but actually easy - and I've yet to see anything said that persuaded them otherwise.

God knows it winds me up, and I'm a man. It is a wall against which you can bang your head into a bloody pulp and still not make an iota of difference. So try not to let it get to you, or put you off posting here.

Olympic weightlifter Lidia Valentín could out lift many bodybuilders but to compare Olympic weightlifting or calisthenics to Bodybuilding is similar to comparing apples and oranges. Most of them know that a Lidia Valentín or Rhonda Rousey will never show up at their gym and set out to impress the other gym rats or cardio bunnies with bravado lifting.

Physical strength in any sport or discipline will only get you so far, the mind is the most powerful weapon. Acceptance comes from within, not from the vanity mirrors of a gym or the beauty products advertised by a media outlet. That is why I prefer the outdoors over a gym, there is something masculine about it.

I do also much prefer the outdoors. But the winter is really bad for me and I don't tolerate it well. I wish I could go hiking every day. I like to climb things too, so I really would like to try scrambling. I also enjoy bike riding.

I really wish I had an adult sort of playground or obstacle course. Being active and outdoors is one of the best feelings for me.