Media, Fiction And Real Life Influencing Aspies

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Hopeless_Aspie_Guy
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20 Mar 2016, 1:36 pm

Do you feel lonelier or left out because of things you see in the media, fiction or witness in real life?

So for people in the UK it’d perhaps be soap-operas (also known as serial dramas) where you have a group of fictional friends (who are for the time of filming probably kinda friends in real life too) on TV that you feel you almost know and could be part of the group with even though in reality (and your knowledge of aspergers and your own social limitations and other peoples lack of affection etc towards you) you know that they’d be no different to all the other non celebs you’ve wanted to but failed to become friends with.
Or maybe it’s the girls in the group you find ‘hot’, but you know that they’d never turn to you when their fictional partner has cheated on them or they’re in some other spot of bother (much as you fantasize or could perhaps genuinely be of comfort or the new lover that they turn to) not that you could see them genuinely turning to you for help. Maybe you’d like to envision yourself as that guy that got the girl pregnant and of which is now actually being pursued by her and if nothing else you relish being pursued. Perhaps you’ve just been seduced by someone who can’t help herself (or his self) around you. How many times do you see yourself as being that better girl or guy that the fictional girl/guy should probably date or have sex with etc?
The almost sad thing is that perhaps you could be an actor or actress (some aspies act all the time, just to appear normal to NTs) and that the only kisses or other comradery you’ll ever exchange is through the fictional or rehearsed screenplay outside of which they’re all indifferent towards you and exchange pleasantries at best. Ultimately fame and popularity kinda go hand in hand so perhaps for most aspies it’s an impossibility anyway.

My point is that fiction presents a variety (and perhaps for many aspies it’s all you’ve ever known and or ever will) of scenarios you perhaps dream to be in but know you never could/would (whereas your average NT girl or guy has perhaps been in half of the ones you’ve fantasized about and for which things don’t seem quite so fictional or unattainable). You live much of life with these fictional characters or share a long journey with a group of attractive girls/guys or just a group of friends you want to involve yourself with, only to find them parting ways from the friend/lover they never knew they had when they get to their desired train station (or you depart at yours). Even as a driver you see other cars full of people, friends and couples and there you are driving solo (again). You can’t escape any of this so long as you watch TV or venture out into the NT dominated world, so how do you see/deal with all of this or are you just content (or fooling yourself into thinking you are) with having none of this and perhaps never having it?


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20 Mar 2016, 2:26 pm

Soap operas are unrelated to real life. Soap opera relationships are equally unattainable for NTs as for Aspies.



SparkyCosmos
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20 Mar 2016, 10:45 pm

Yes, all the time. I see people interact (both in fiction and in real life) and I am just surprised with how easy they make it look. And I know that they probably don't have to put any effort into it at all. Just the other day when I was with one of my friends, he held what felt like a 10 minute conversation with a complete stranger while I just loomed behind him awkwardly.



Nocturnus
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21 Mar 2016, 5:38 am

No.

Most soaps portray socially dynamic and melodramatic people. EastEnders is the most comedic one on British television, I used to watch it for a laugh.

That is why I watch Netflix originals and boycott televised soaps.



Hopeless_Aspie_Guy
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21 Mar 2016, 5:44 am

Nocturnus wrote:
No.

Most soaps portray socially dynamic and melodramatic people. EastEnders is the most comedic one on British television, I used to watch it for a laugh.

That is why I watch Netflix originals and boycott televised soaps.


I did also mention though that some of the things you'd see in film/TV you see in real life (on the train or various other public places).


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AQ Test- 29. RAADS-R Test- 72


Empathy
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25 Mar 2016, 6:20 pm

I am an Eastenders soap fan :D and not just for the comedy either. Whilst most of it isn't meant to appear real in every sense, it definitely explores true life outside of the box. I wish there was a chat thread on here for the more inquisitive empaths out there who wish to indulge in societies equal sharing.



Hopeless_Aspie_Guy
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26 Mar 2016, 4:09 am

Empathy wrote:
I am an Eastenders soap fan :D and not just for the comedy either. Whilst most of it isn't meant to appear real in every sense, it definitely explores true life outside of the box. I wish there was a chat thread on here for the more inquisitive empaths out there who wish to indulge in societies equal sharing.

Interesting. What did you mean by that last bit?


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AQ Test- 29. RAADS-R Test- 72


Nocturnus
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26 Mar 2016, 6:20 am

Empathy wrote:
I am an Eastenders soap fan :D and not just for the comedy either. Whilst most of it isn't meant to appear real in every sense, it definitely explores true life outside of the box. I wish there was a chat thread on here for the more inquisitive empaths out there who wish to indulge in societies equal sharing.


People are rarely communal in England anymore, I don't think there is a sense of community spirit. People may be more sociable in warmer climates but I think that could be a cultural influence.



Empathy
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26 Mar 2016, 7:49 pm

^^ :|
I’d have to disagree. Communal spirit is one of the main vibes and what keeps people going.
The real part about segregation in a welfare state is to share and share alike. We’re all giving and manifesting interest in the wider community and not just within a straight social network.
To say it’s become something of a bygone age, is just going to ignite more extremist views and hate rows over people who do have a say over human rights.