Have people ever been attracted to you BECAUSE of autism?
My spouse was. They are possibly on the spectrum, but definitely a hard introvert. Sometimes being an Aspie isn't all that different from being a hopeless romantic. When we first met I had the single minded drive to get up super early to set up romantic plans; because I have sensory issues & am not extremely social they tended to be in wonderfully peaceful, calm places. They were also attracted to my...insistence in following some level of decorum and proper etiquette. Since we were (are) so similar, having to take things incredibly slowly and incrementally (don't like too much change at once) gave us each the time we needed to build trust, comfort and eventually friendship and love.
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nick007
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My 2nd & current girlfriend were/are but they are also on the spectrum & we met on this site. I don't think anyone else was ever attracted to those traits including my 1st girlfriend who was not on the spectrum.
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"I don't have an anger problem, I have an idiot problem!"
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https://memory-alpha.fandom.com/wiki/Ru ... cquisition
Four words: Manic Pixie Dream Girls.
I'm sure you've heard of it - a movie stock character where a cute, socially awkward, pretty, quirky, eccentric, artistic woman essentially comes into the depressed male protagonist's life and makes him happy.
If you actually look at most MPDG characters, they could definitely pass for being on the spectrum.
My ex-girlfriend had the personality traits of an MPDG; childish, innocent, playful, quirky/awkward, etc. but was also headstrong, independent, intelligent and mature.
I thought she was possibly an aspie but it turns out she was N.T. And once I knew that I slowly started to realize she definitely had N.T. level social skills.
It's just, she talked a little odd/funny because she was deaf as a child, and she was generally playful to the point of not reading other people's body language/emotions (e.g. my step-dad was lying down and he is NOT the type to be disturbed, and she was trying to poke him with a stick for a few seconds. Had to stop her QUICKLY. ).
Yes, I am really damn attracted to MPDG's, and coincidentally it is in my experiences plenty of Aspie females are quirky, awkward and 'cute'.
In fact, I liked an aspie female last year and it was all the traits that made her autistic I must have been particularly drawn to (her awkwardness, quirkiness, how she would passionately rave about her interests, etc.)
I don't think anyone was ever attracted to me because of my disability. I guess you could say my husband was attracted to me because of it because of my childish quirks and innocence and not picking up on him flirting with me.
But I think I am attracted to autistic people because I feel an attraction for them and seem to like them more than NT guys and other guys with other conditions or mental issues. I was attracted to my ex because he said he was aspie but at first I wasn't because I thought he was a normal guy when we met. But unfortunately things didn't work out between us and he wasn't a very nice person. Plus I seemed to have turned him off because he was not attracted to my traits because they were too childish and he didn't like my quirks so he would ignore me unless he felt I was acting mature enough for him. I think I am the one with an autism fetish but I wouldn't go out and seek an autistic person specifically or try and date one because of their autism because I think that would be creepy. But I would join an autism dating site if I weren't married or taken.
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Son: Diagnosed w/anxiety and ADHD. Also academic delayed and ASD lv 1.
Daughter: NT, no diagnoses. Possibly OCD. Is very private about herself.
I looked at the the thread's title and thought of number 29 of this list.
A surprising amount of intelligent people have been attracted to me in the past, and since autism colours everything I do, it has to be held partially responsible. The most obvious reason I can think of is that some autistic people look younger then their age, and I think that applies to me.
I'm not sure how I'd react if a girl admitted that she wanted to go out with me because of Aspergers... I'd probably be a bit creeped out, but I'd probably give it a chance.
A surprising amount of intelligent people have been attracted to me in the past, and since autism colours everything I do, it has to be held partially responsible. The most obvious reason I can think of is that some autistic people look younger then their age, and I think that applies to me.
I'm not sure how I'd react if a girl admitted that she wanted to go out with me because of Aspergers... I'd probably be a bit creeped out, but I'd probably give it a chance.
I'd really hate to date a girl like that. I've heard about girls in the lesbian community who are turned on by endearing awkwardness. I'd hate for that to be the reason they're attracted to me. I have a feeling those girls are similar to the girl you just mentioned.
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Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 82 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 124 of 200
You are very likely neurotypical
Last edited by DevilKisses on 21 Mar 2016, 1:19 am, edited 1 time in total.
Apparently I'm "cute." My mannerisms, facial expressions, way of speaking, etc are apparently cute to at least one person. So I suppose it's because of my autism since I do seem childish in some ways.
And another liked my direct manner of speaking, particularly my ability to talk about sex plainly, which many women don't do. I suspect that some men can relate to me better because I am more direct like a man.
I'm pretty sure most people who have liked me a lot have liked me because of my autistic traits. Not a fetish, as far as I know, just an attraction to the type of person that I am. But it's the more positive traits, not the negative ones, that they are attracted to. So, my unpretentiousness, blunt honesty and openness, rational way of thinking, attention to details, etc etc. Not the way I have meltdowns after a failed social interaction and that sort of thing. Those get "tolerated" I suppose (or they don't, hah).
Yep that too.
If people do have an autism fetish, I've never heard of it. My first gf very well might have been on the spectrum herself and seemed to find my autism very interesting to say the least....But my most recent ex-gf has borderline, is highly gregarious, and was repulsed by it in more ways than one. She even used against me to constantly f*ck with me and insult me for it. IDK if I can ever forgive her for that.
it hasnt happened. people arent real to themselves. women compliment me. but no go. i had my share of dealing with women. but really the negative women are the problem. there is no decent woman. all lies and no way to show interest.
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In order to be free, you must take your chances of letting your tortured self to be forgiven.
That mentality could be problematic.
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