Hi,
Dated a very very quiet woman for 4 months + 1 months of social media + 1 month we're off due to vacation/b trips. Not exclusive haven't held hands yet. Doesn't help when she's extremely traditional and conservative (Asian). I'm from the same culture as her but just a little more liberal.
Just wondering if the following points towards Aspergers, if not, what does it point towards? (I listed observations and 3rd party opinions only).
Please NOTE: This is a woman (31 yrs of age) we are analyzing here
Opinions of people who knows of this person:
Isolated , Weird/eccentric, Self Centred, Must hit the right topic for her to talk
My own observations:
She doesn't really talk. Although she can get excited and ask a ton of question or act like a little girl when she sees a certain stimuli or placed in a certain environment.
Doesn't have a lot of friends. She's got 4 friends she would hang out with and they are all colleagues.
Excuses herself after dinner to sit in a corner alone while others are chatting. Same issue when she's with a group of ladies at a cottage too (her good friend was part of the group, and some friends there were new to her).
Low energy level.
Doesn't understand jokes or humor (most of the time, although she would get some jokes written on billboards or what not) - and takes a lot of things seriously.
Seems to take information literally.
Can be forgetful (picking up tabs that she promised, signing up to painting classes she wants me to go to)
Can't ever talk on the phone. Must text.
Not v willing to try new things.
Rigid - eats limited selection of food. One time we were walking to my car she took a longer route into the parking lot while I took a vector route by walking on grass (its a park). Maybe becos she was in her fav block heels?
She would not leave until she has finished at least 8 hours of work at the office.
Risk Averse - thinks cycling is too dangerous. Refuses to jay walk a two lane road when traffic is 20 seconds away from us. I had enough time to cross the road 3 times to fetch her before there were any cars.
Haven't been able to hold any two way communication; can never start a conversation.
Very passive. Doesn't reach out to nobody unless it's something of her particular interest.
Frequently twirls her hair and sniffs it.
Mechanical yes/no responses, or sentences no longer than 10 words.
Not a lot of body language.
Fond of solitary activities - reading, painting, tv, movies, eating
Looks young for her age (31)
Doesn't put on a lot of make up and no perfume
Sensitive to personal or emo related questions
Always late for outings. Never on time. (from 15-30 mins late)
Hates lies. Even if it's a white lie. (was told explicitly)
Can go from White to Black really quickly.
Haven't heard her share any experiences unless asked upon (for 5 months). e.g. Where have you traveled? Spain. Whereabouts? A, B and C. What is the food like? "It's OK".
One time I asked her out to the beach, she said it would rain that day (according to weather report), I responded if it rains we will go to the bookstore/movies. She then replied me in exact same words broken into 3 sentences "if it rains we will go to the bookstore/movies" - obviously done through text.
Not too sure but her facial emotions are: straight face, polite smile (when posing for pics), and confused look. Haven't seen anything else.
When she is uncertain about something of interest, she goes into lengths to research it. From basketball rules to precise definition of a certain word (e.g. asked me what impressionable means, I said to give a person a strong image that sticks to the mind, she googled it, said my interpretation is wrong and gave me the precise definition from Webster)..to what I do for a living and my past work experience (was like talking to a recruiter).
Extremely bright on the academic side of stuff
I think she's extremely logical...perhaps too logical. Expects to know everything about a person before committing into a relationship (doesnt help she's never been in one either).
Signs she's NOT an aspie:
Can keep eye contact
Able to ask 'is person A interested in you' after I told her person A cried when I told her I like person B (can identify emotion?)
Never seen any meltdown
Don't know of any sensory issues although she would sit in a corner when people chit chat after dinner. She also did tell me before her tasting buds are fairly sensitive and that there was some tuna she said tasted bad, but I couldnt tell.
Likes to travel (on her own or with 1 friend of hers that I mentioned above)
Been on dating website for past 4-5 years w/ many friends introducing guys to her (haven't gone into any relationships though)
Other pointers:
Dad asked me on two occasions (when she's not around) if I have a lot of friends in town, whether I do a lot of social networking events. He was also concerned about me flying out of town 3 weeks in a year for conferences...don't know if that meant anything.
08 Aug 2016, 3:49 pm
