Am i doomed for life

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So hello everyone. New here, hope everyone is doing well. I've suspected I've had autism for the past two years but I've not had a way to confirm it. I do think I show certain signs and I was speaking to a friend of mine and he suggested I come here. I've wanted to honor therapy or speak to a psychiatrist about these issues I've had but since I can't afford that currently, maybe this is a good start. I've always been a shy guy especially when it comes to the opposite sex. I don't understand the game I guess you could say and I'm very awkward when it comes to introductions and putting myself out there. I've not had good results in the past and they've put me off trying to talk to girls. I'm not good with flirting either. Socially awkward would be another one, there have been times where I've tried speaking to a girl and I'll freeze unable to think of what to say. It's depressing at times because it makes me think I'll be forever alone. Frustrating to say the least.

I've had crushes but shamed to say they were more like infatuations and looking back on my past actions, I cringe horribly. I was one annoying ass hat and I didn't realize it. I've had past relationships but they were never anything real. putting to much thought in to it because of psst situations and relationships. There's a part of me that feels somewhat low because I feel like I've never really had a relationship so I'm feared I don't even know how to do it. Yes I had past relationships but I'm realizing they weren't real. Just me being used in some way or they felt sorry for me. One girl I dated for a little while back in late 2014 we dated for 3 months and then she broke up with me a week before Valentine's day, she said she just wanted to cuddle buddy. Well of course that hurt. Pardon my rambling, basically the part I'm trying to get at is I'm worried because of these past events and my experiences, I'll never really know how to go about meeting someone or even how to function in a relationship. I've always wanted a loving caring relationship but sometimes I worry I'll never have it. I don't even know if love exist or what it even is.

Part of me is also scared to get my heart broken. Im still trying to figure out who I am as a person and what sort of girl I should go for. What if I'm too weird? Even then would she accept me? Days when I'm being difficult or I just want to be alone or I'm just in a crappy mood. I've got no issue doing it for them...just seems like I can never find someone who would do the same. That's another reason I'm here, maybe this forum can help steer me where I should go and do?

I sense that the girl who wanted to be your "cuddle buddy" wanted to wait before she made a physical commitment (sex) with you.

I happen to like girls who enjoy cuddling. I could wait patiently.....while the "cuddle" turns into something more intimate.

I feel this is a way for girls to "feel out" guys. If a guy is able to cuddle without sex, the guy is trustworthy to these sorts of girls.

You are not "doomed for life." Far from it. You've had relationships (while some guys here have never had one.).

I probably should have explained the full story to that. Yes she did want a cuddle buddy and in a sense she was trying to still figure me out because she had bad experiences with past guy's and I understood that, heck love cuddling but after we broke up, she made a comment on facebook saying she was ready for a sexual relationship and I found out she only dated me because I wasn't as experienced. I felt like she was just using me for some security and in a sense she was. Still trying to make sense of it but I guess I was there and she felt like I was a good match but after awhile no.

You're not hopeless, my friend.

Perhaps you were used by this girl.

But there will be others.


Just don't fall into the trap of being cynical. One you adopt the cynical ideology, you are "doomed."

I've not gone that far. I couldn't be cynical...it'd kill me but I don't want to go down this cycle continually.

I'll let you in on something: there's no such thing as being "doomed for life". Love is an unpredictable little bugger. I had the pleasure of finding that out last summer when I fell in love without even expecting to.

My suggestion to you would be to try and get yourself out there - do some confidence-boosting exercises, talk to as many girls as you can, and then see if things go anywhere from there. I know it's not easy, but it's honestly the best advice I can give.

My issue is how exactly does one do that? I've always struggled with the whole putting yourself out there. I know there are clubs and all though I've been to both, knowing me and how many people there are, I don't think it'd work for me. The problem is finding whst works for me...still haven't quite caught it. I read some people suggest going to places you like and then trying to meet people of similar interest.

That would make sense--going to places where you and potential partners would have similar interests.

It's better than doing nothing.

It would be nice if you could meet somebody here on WP. But start off writing to each other like friends.