Needs some help deciphering signals......

Post Reply New Topic

Hey fellow aspies.
This one particular girl has left me pretty confused.
I am a student, and in my class there is this one girl whom I find good looking. However, I considered her to be out of my league so I never approached her. She is an extremely shy type of girl and possibly on the spectrum herself.
However, during the more dull moments in class, I began to catch the girl staring at me. I caught her eye, she'd give a deer in the headlights type of look and look away embarrased. And when class is over, I began to notice her not far away from wherever I was on my way out of school. She began to colonize my imagination, the image of her face kept drifting within my psyche. I was terrified because I felt a new obsession with a girl approaching. It never turns out well for me, these things.
So I decided to approach her. I sat next to her for a day in class. It was quite fun, and I didn't do or say anything stupid, she laughed a lot at my quips. I made her an origami crane out of my class notes, which she liked. I was euphoric that day. The next day, I find her alone in the lab and sit next to her. She asks me to leave room for her friends. I obliged and didn't bother her. I felt rejected however. A few days later, I decided to message her on facebook, just a simple 'Hello' nothing extravagant. She never replied.
I decided to start the process of getting over her. However, the glances have not stopped. When I caught her glance, I held her glance for a while before she broke off. We keep exchanging glances regularly, along with the occasional smile. This has prevented me from getting over her.
But she still doesn't respond to my attempts at approaching her. All I get is a smile and then she ignores me. I feel like dumbass after my modest 'hello' or 'did you get that bit of lecture?' bombs. Thankfully, whenever I approached her, I have avoided coming off as desperate or pervy. Just the casual icebreakers which always flop except for the time I had the self esteem to sit next to her in class.
At this point there is only long distance flirtation with holding eye contact with one another across the room. It is now a long holiday, and I am nursing my self confidence. I am so terribly confused WP, does she even like me? Does she just enjoy the attention? Am I no good at talking to women? Is it that she knows I smoke and stuff (I quit smoking though)? Is it because that I am not from her ethnic group?
I want to get her out of my head but she won't let me.

If you're friends on Facebook (or any social media platform) with her, I'll give you some solid advice.
Find your strengths (creative things: photography, origami, etc.)
Use them to your advantage for things to post about.
You're going to want a good profile picture of yourself. (Very important)
The next step will be to search for as many women in a 25 mile radius from you and add them all.
This will increase your odds dramatically for them to like your posts, pictures, etc.
Girls love competition and to see other women interested.
She's playing hard to get, so no more eye contact or messaging for now.
Although it is very difficult to achieve, ignoring them after you show interest is all part of "the chase".
Next, befriend another female in the same class that she doesn't talk to.
Talk to the new girl more, or even a friend and completely ignore her. Give it a couple months and try again, but only if she "likes" your Facebook posts more frequently.
If she doesn't take the bait and show more interest, move on.
I've been with girls like that five years later and it's worth the wait.
She might be talking to someone else right now, but she will be there when you're both ready.
Good luck.

Jesus, human mating practices are really byzantine. Does this sort of bizarre crap happen only during the early stages of relationships or does it continue into the later more advanced stages? If I do manage by some miracle get a girlfriiend, do I have the option of normal straight talk instead of this convoluted sort of communication with all the paradoxical behaviour?

Vital reading for your quest for wimmenz...

Sign language
http://www.learnsignlanguage.co.uk/free ... inners.pdf

Morse Code
http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/tactile ... type=eBook

A book on the evolution on aesthetic and expressive dance
https://www.amazon.com/Evolution-Aesthe ... B005Y5OKZ2

About $55 and 3 weeks later you should be able to work wonders in the nightclubs and on your smartphone.
Good luck.

I confess I know just one person from Nepal, but I can imagine this could be a deal breaker there. I suspect she is attracted to you, but doesn't feel free to act on those feelings. My advice would be to try to maintain some level of contact with her but give up any short-term plans for romance.