Do you believe in soul mates?

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hale_bopp
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08 Jul 2018, 5:18 am

Have you ever met someone who you connected with on a deeper level?

I think many people just settle for "who is good enough for now" rather than seek out this sort of connection. Is it something you would be willing to wait for?

I imagine it would be one of the most amazing experiences ever. I've only had similar experiences in my dreams. I don't know if it's real, or even possible.



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08 Jul 2018, 5:41 am

I thought I had, many times, but I either ended up cheated on , lied to, or being accused of things that weren't true in the end.


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yellowtamarin
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08 Jul 2018, 5:46 am

I don't think I believe in soul mates - you'll have to define what you mean by the term. But if you do just mean someone you connect with on a deeper level than usual, then yes, I've had that. Unfortunately I haven't had it with someone with whom I was compatible in enough other ways. But in the early stages of a relationship (first few months or year), when there is that "deeper level" connection, it's pretty darn great. I hope to find someone who I have that with AND we last for the long haul. I hope you find it too, of course :)



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08 Jul 2018, 6:20 am

I believe in the concept. I’ve experienced it—but it didn’t last long.



whatamievendoing
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08 Jul 2018, 7:30 am

I do indeed believe in soulmates. I really fell in love only once - and the main reason for it was the fact that I connected with my then-crush on a level I'd never experienced before. No happy ending, though.

Either way, it may be contradictory to the fact that I don't believe in "The One". The two concepts are often interlinked to my understanding, but personally, I don't like the idea of there being only one specific person out of over 3.5 billion - or 7 billion if you're bisexual - that's destined to be the love of your life. If that were really the case, the chances of anyone finding a compatible partner would be infinitesimal. And your soulmate won't necessarily be a significant other.


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AngelRho
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08 Jul 2018, 8:02 am

hale_bopp wrote:
Have you ever met someone who you connected with on a deeper level?

I think many people just settle for "who is good enough for now" rather than seek out this sort of connection. Is it something you would be willing to wait for?

I imagine it would be one of the most amazing experiences ever. I've only had similar experiences in my dreams. I don't know if it's real, or even possible.

As for settling for good enough right now goes...

I’m always saying people should make an effort to get to know a lot of people, build friendships, build a long list of potential dates, actually go out with these people, get to know them, and see what works out with who.

I get accused of suggesting people settle for the first person who actually likes you back, along with all sorts of worst case scenarios.

C’est la vie, and I don’t believe my “detractors” (haha) are really all that interested in dating and relationships. So I don’t worry about it or take it personally.

The problem people have, as I see it, is that we take entirely too much for granted. Sometimes going out with someone you aren’t crazy attracted to is simply better than spending the entire weekend alone. Sometimes your standards aren’t simply high—they are INSANE. And sometimes the person you never thought you’d find attractive ends up being the best person anyone could end up with.

And some of us like myself are too scared to date out of our “league.” I took a chance on that and ended up with not only a great gf, but a best friend and wife.

I think when you’re dating, yes, finding “the One” is infinitesimal as to be impossible because what you’re looking for doesn’t really exist. Probably most people out there end up with their soulmate. But I don’t think it happens because you’re looking. I think after some time passes after you’ve been with someone you open your eyes and understand that it just happened, your soulmate came to you.

In other words, if you have a soulmate out there, you WILL end up together. I just don’t believe you necessarily KNOW for sure until after the fact. Like other users have said, I’d thought at times I’d found her and was disappointed. In my case, she was the first to figure it out, but it’s been many years since I had any doubts.



nick007
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08 Jul 2018, 8:32 am

I did when I was with my 1st girlfriend. We were best friends before she told me she liked me. I don't believe in the concept now because soulmates implies there can only be one person you will ever feel that way about & have that kind of connection with. What happens if something happens to that person like if they die or if circumstances beyond both your control force you to break up; your forced to spend the rest of your life alone because that person was the only person for you since they were your soulmate. I think that belief can lead to lots of loneliness due to missing out on opportunities to be with someone who may be just as good as your soulmate was for you.


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08 Jul 2018, 8:54 am

hale_bopp wrote:
Have you ever met someone who you connected with on a deeper level?

I think many people just settle for "who is good enough for now" rather than seek out this sort of connection. Is it something you would be willing to wait for?

I imagine it would be one of the most amazing experiences ever. I've only had similar experiences in my dreams. I don't know if it's real, or even possible.


I don’t think a relationship is worth it unless you connect on a deep level.

I do believe in soulmates.



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08 Jul 2018, 9:35 am

I do believe in soul mates but I have given up on true love a long time ago. This is just because I have been through too much and have too many problems. For one reason, I really don't believe there is a woman who would accept me for who I am and with whom I could be my true self. The other reason is that I don't want to be a burden. As a caring, empathic and supportive person, it would just hurt me to be a burden to the woman I love. Decided to just stay alone and that is fine.


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08 Jul 2018, 10:37 am

For others: Yes, soul mates do exist. I have seen it in my family tree many times. My great uncle and aunt were happily married for 75 years until he passed away from COPD at age 95. One set of my grandparents were happily married for 50 years, the other were for 40 years. They only separated due to death. My parents were happily married for 40 years before my dad passed on.

For me: From personal experiences, I highly doubt that one exists. There can be limits to what the universe can hold true.



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08 Jul 2018, 10:37 am

Yes, but i don't believe we have only one.

I've had that someone I've felt totally comfortable with a few times, but sometimes circumstances aren't right.

I wouldn't want to get into a serious relationship with someone I didn't feel I had a connection with where we both felt comfortable being ourselves with each other.

I need to actually like the other person's personality. I need to enjoy their company. And that is special. Like family.

It's special because I just tolerate the majority of people I know. People in general irritate me. When I meet one that I actually respect and enjoy talking to... that's what I call a soul mate or a kindred spirit.



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08 Jul 2018, 10:45 am

Just because a person was married a long time doesn't mean happiness. Marriage used to be a lifetime commitment.

No. I don't believe in soul mates. I am happy though with my partner.



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08 Jul 2018, 10:56 am

hale_bopp wrote:
Do You Believe In Soul Mates?
No. The term “Soul Mate” is merely a concept used to explain the euphoric rush and subsequent emotional attachment one might feel when “falling in love”.

In other words, it’s nothing more than a pretty phrase used to describe hormonal-based lust and infatuation.


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hurtloam
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08 Jul 2018, 11:06 am

Fnord wrote:
hale_bopp wrote:
Do You Believe In Soul Mates?
No. The term “Soul Mate” is merely a concept used to explain the euphoric rush and subsequent emotional attachment one might feel when “falling in love”.

In other words, it’s nothing more than a pretty phrase used to describe hormonal-based lust and infatuation.


No it's not that. Infatuation and lust are what they are and very pedestrian. I've been attracted to loads of men who were not at all soul mates. A soul mate is a person you want to be around more than that. They are someone you want to be with regardless of lust. They are your best friend. They accept you and you accept them.



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08 Jul 2018, 11:34 am

No, I don't. I think love is more a result of opportunity than something of deeper meaning, like "we were meant to be" , "serendipity" etc. For example, I could be a "perfect match" for one particular lady, but if we never meet or if I never get over my fear of rejection, then how can we be soulmates? In saying that though, two souls can unite and one's love for another can be explained by more than just chemistry and the human need to procreate.

People can fall in love for various reasons, but I don't think it means you've necessarily met your soulmate. You just met someone, you felt an attraction, and took it to the next level. Love to me is different from attraction, in that when you love, you're devoted rather than infatuated. If you find someone who is both devoted to, and infatuated by you, then you're pretty lucky in my opinion. Maybe some people would regard that as meeting one's soulmate. I just don't like using the term though.



nick007
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08 Jul 2018, 11:41 am

As I said I believed in soulmates with my 1st girlfriend but I love my ex, celeb crush & my current girlfriend just as much as I still love my 1st girlfriend thou it feels alittle different for each of em but it's about equal so there's 4 people who could be my soulmate but soulmate is only one person so Idon't believe in the concept of soulmates


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