13 Aug 2018, 5:24 pm
asp159
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Joined: 20 Apr 2016
Age: 31
Gender: Male
Posts: 56
Location: United Kingdom
13 Aug 2018, 6:23 pm
BeaArthur wrote:
In that case, maybe all the lonely single Aspie guys should make a bigger effort to meet ladies on the spectrum. Just a thought.
That is what I concluded at one point. The only real aspie dating site i've found is spectrumsingles. Unfortunately there are only two woman on it in my area and they both logged in over a year ago. I'm using meetup.com as there's an aspie meetup group near me. Actually got talking to a woman there then I found out she was married and 20 years older than me
There's no meetings with that group anymore though.Anyone else used something similar?
13 Aug 2018, 6:37 pm
asp159 wrote:
BeaArthur wrote:
In that case, maybe all the lonely single Aspie guys should make a bigger effort to meet ladies on the spectrum. Just a thought.
That is what I concluded at one point. The only real aspie dating site i've found is spectrumsingles. Unfortunately there are only two woman on it in my area and they both logged in over a year ago. I'm using meetup.com as there's an aspie meetup group near me. Actually got talking to a woman there then I found out she was married and 20 years older than me
There's no meetings with that group anymore though.Anyone else used something similar?
Don't listen to Bea. The problem is that there are an overwhelmingly larger number of men looking than there are women. It's not about looking more, and you shouldn't respect an argument that says that you should try harder simply because of your gender. Men have to deal with a lot on dating sites that women don't take seriously. You can send many, MANY (I mean many tens or hundreds of carefully crafted) messages and not receive a response. If you do receive a response, or even engage in a lengthy and meaningful conversation, it's common that they will ghost you for no apparent reason.
I'm no Incel, and I'm not interested in gender politics. These things happen for material reasons. Women believe that they have it harder than anyone, because they often do, and this overextends into matters like this. They simply don't understand, and won't recognise, your difficulties. If they experienced them then they'd be the first to rally with you.
With that said? Look around. Don't stick to one site. Stay hopeful even when you're betrayed. It's rough as hell.
RetroGamer87
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Joined: 30 Jul 2013
Age: 36
Gender: Male
Posts: 11,042
Location: Adelaide, Australia
13 Aug 2018, 9:18 pm
goldfish21
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Joined: 17 Feb 2013
Age: 42
Gender: Male
Posts: 22,612
Location: Vancouver, BC, Canada
13 Aug 2018, 10:29 pm
kraftiekortie wrote:
Many women are not into the "social-Darwinism" thing.
They don't necessarily seek out the physically "fittest" guy. I've actually known women who are turned off to that type of guy.
I'm not 6 foot 2, 205 lbs. of solid muscle, with only 13 percent body fat. Yet, I've done okay.
I will never reach even to 5 foot 5, no less 6 foot 2. I'll never go below 20% body fat.
The mentality of the beach does not extend to most other places.
They don't necessarily seek out the physically "fittest" guy. I've actually known women who are turned off to that type of guy.
I'm not 6 foot 2, 205 lbs. of solid muscle, with only 13 percent body fat. Yet, I've done okay.
I will never reach even to 5 foot 5, no less 6 foot 2. I'll never go below 20% body fat.
The mentality of the beach does not extend to most other places.
I said it helps/makes a difference, not that it’s a necessity. I can’t help but observe that girls hit on me a lot more now that I’m in shape. And as a gay man, it’s not even my goal. But it happens, so, I share it here because physical fitness, in general, attracts people. And most here can control their fitness level in order to make themselves more attractive.
As for the beach, you don’t understand the beach I go to. At all. It’s not douchebag muscle beach. At all. Yes, there are body builders, athletes, and MMA fighters there - but the beach I go to is a nude beach full of hippies all about body acceptance. Fat people, ugly people, old people, Trans people, tall/short, young/old, straight/gay, all races etc no one cares. It’s a place for everyone. The musclehead hard body douchebags hangout at English Bay downtown where they show off to each other, not Wreck Beach where we’re there to hangout with each other.
_________________
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for supporting trump. Because doing so is deplorable.goldfish21
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Joined: 17 Feb 2013
Age: 42
Gender: Male
Posts: 22,612
Location: Vancouver, BC, Canada
13 Aug 2018, 10:32 pm
Tanker wrote:
Whenever I see a couple walking by or sitting, being cute, I cant help but get a mix of feelings.
1: "aw, cute. i want that" (jealousy)
2:"f**k them and their happiness"(anger)
3: "goddamnit, i'll never have that"(sadness)
anybody else have that or am i just a special kind of crazy? xD
1: "aw, cute. i want that" (jealousy)
2:"f**k them and their happiness"(anger)
3: "goddamnit, i'll never have that"(sadness)
anybody else have that or am i just a special kind of crazy? xD
I used to do that more when I was depressed. More recently, though, I’m mostly happy for their happiness & only somewhat envious.
_________________
No
for supporting trump. Because doing so is deplorable.RetroGamer87
Veteran
Joined: 30 Jul 2013
Age: 36
Gender: Male
Posts: 11,042
Location: Adelaide, Australia
14 Aug 2018, 3:33 am
14 Aug 2018, 7:33 am
14 Aug 2018, 7:40 am
14 Aug 2018, 3:49 pm
15 Aug 2018, 3:28 am
Peacesells wrote:
Tanker wrote:
goldfish21 wrote:
Tanker wrote:
Whenever I see a couple walking by or sitting, being cute, I cant help but get a mix of feelings.
1: "aw, cute. i want that" (jealousy)
2:"f**k them and their happiness"(anger)
3: "goddamnit, i'll never have that"(sadness)
anybody else have that or am i just a special kind of crazy? xD
1: "aw, cute. i want that" (jealousy)
2:"f**k them and their happiness"(anger)
3: "goddamnit, i'll never have that"(sadness)
anybody else have that or am i just a special kind of crazy? xD
I used to do that more when I was depressed. More recently, though, I’m mostly happy for their happiness & only somewhat envious.
What sure doesnt help is that i am depressed(shocker..) and that i've never had a relationship, so i have no idea what im supposed to be doing, when...
You can try to become physically more appealing, if you are not very much. That might help.
i've tried numerous times to lose some weight. I usually end up breaking something in my body or i get depressed again....
other than that, i honestly dont know how to make myself more attractive to women. if you have any other points to improve upon, feel free to share the wisdom
RetroGamer87
Veteran
Joined: 30 Jul 2013
Age: 36
Gender: Male
Posts: 11,042
Location: Adelaide, Australia
15 Aug 2018, 5:09 am
Tanker wrote:
Peacesells wrote:
Tanker wrote:
goldfish21 wrote:
Tanker wrote:
Whenever I see a couple walking by or sitting, being cute, I cant help but get a mix of feelings.
1: "aw, cute. i want that" (jealousy)
2:"f**k them and their happiness"(anger)
3: "goddamnit, i'll never have that"(sadness)
anybody else have that or am i just a special kind of crazy? xD
1: "aw, cute. i want that" (jealousy)
2:"f**k them and their happiness"(anger)
3: "goddamnit, i'll never have that"(sadness)
anybody else have that or am i just a special kind of crazy? xD
I used to do that more when I was depressed. More recently, though, I’m mostly happy for their happiness & only somewhat envious.
What sure doesnt help is that i am depressed(shocker..) and that i've never had a relationship, so i have no idea what im supposed to be doing, when...
You can try to become physically more appealing, if you are not very much. That might help.
i've tried numerous times to lose some weight. I usually end up breaking something in my body or i get depressed again....
other than that, i honestly dont know how to make myself more attractive to women. if you have any other points to improve upon, feel free to share the wisdom
If you have trouble losing weight you should get some Phentermine.
15 Aug 2018, 5:23 am
Tanker wrote:
i've tried numerous times to lose some weight. I usually end up breaking something in my body or i get depressed again....
other than that, i honestly dont know how to make myself more attractive to women. if you have any other points to improve upon, feel free to share the wisdom
other than that, i honestly dont know how to make myself more attractive to women. if you have any other points to improve upon, feel free to share the wisdom
Well I don't know your looks, but I guess if you have tried numerous times to lose weight you probably aren't very thin. Too bad there is no magical way, you just have to do it, it's not rocket science it's just a stupid diet so keep following it.
Also if you keep hurting yourself because you have no idea how to do exercise properly you could go to a gym or something, where they can help you.
15 Aug 2018, 5:58 am
i am fat, so... not horribly obese, but i could stand to loose about another 10 kg. already lots about 15, over the last year.
as for exercise, the main problem i have in that regard, is s**t knees. always had s**t knees. so i cant run, jump, do squats, walk up stairs or even bike, sometimes. well, i can. but i run the risk of easily overloading my knees and not being able to do anything for days or weeks. so, that doesnt help xD
15 Aug 2018, 6:09 am
Tanker wrote:
i am fat, so... not horribly obese, but i could stand to loose about another 10 kg. already lots about 15, over the last year.
as for exercise, the main problem i have in that regard, is s**t knees. always had s**t knees. so i cant run, jump, do squats, walk up stairs or even bike, sometimes. well, i can. but i run the risk of easily overloading my knees and not being able to do anything for days or weeks. so, that doesnt help xD
not horribly obese, but i could stand to loose about another 10 kg. already lots about 15, over the last year.as for exercise, the main problem i have in that regard, is s**t knees. always had s**t knees. so i cant run, jump, do squats, walk up stairs or even bike, sometimes. well, i can. but i run the risk of easily overloading my knees and not being able to do anything for days or weeks. so, that doesnt help xD
You lost 15 kgs? I think it's pretty good, so you see, you don't suck at diets.
You should go to a gym perhaps and let them know your problems and ask if they have some way to make you exercise without putting stress on your weak spots.
15 Aug 2018, 6:21 am
Peacesells wrote:
Tanker wrote:
i am fat, so... not horribly obese, but i could stand to loose about another 10 kg. already lots about 15, over the last year.
as for exercise, the main problem i have in that regard, is s**t knees. always had s**t knees. so i cant run, jump, do squats, walk up stairs or even bike, sometimes. well, i can. but i run the risk of easily overloading my knees and not being able to do anything for days or weeks. so, that doesnt help xD
not horribly obese, but i could stand to loose about another 10 kg. already lots about 15, over the last year.as for exercise, the main problem i have in that regard, is s**t knees. always had s**t knees. so i cant run, jump, do squats, walk up stairs or even bike, sometimes. well, i can. but i run the risk of easily overloading my knees and not being able to do anything for days or weeks. so, that doesnt help xD
You lost 15 kgs? I think it's pretty good, so you see, you don't suck at diets.
You should go to a gym perhaps and let them know your problems and ask if they have some way to make you exercise without putting stress on your weak spots.
Bench presses, seated overhead presses, bicep curls, skullcrushers, pushups, side-raises, the possibilities are endless. No knees required. There'll be machines at the gym for upper-body exercises too. You can burn off the fat without touching your knees.
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