Love my aspie

Post Reply New Topic

Note: that’s his term for himself, so I’m feeling free to use it!

I have been with a guy for 7 months and despite some initial communication bumps I’m just so in love with him I don’t know where to begin!! !

He has trouble keeping a job due to learning styles/communication though he’s a hard worker. I recently tried to join some Facebook groups for partners/spouses of Aspergers to try to find tips on how to support his career and I found people in those groups overwhelmingly negative about their partners and Autism in general! It was really frustrating! While I feel some autistic qualities have brought us some unique challenges that we've worked hard to overcome, they also make my love who he is and I wouldn’t wish for him to be any other way.

I am also a divorced mom of three, with a daughter on the high functioning autism spectrum and I’m pretty convinced my dad is undiagnosed Aspergers. I have had many rough experiences socially growing up and lately wonder if I might fall a little close to the spectrum myself but I’ve never admitted that out loud before. I’m happy to be here, if anyone wants to ask me questions about my experience in this relationship I’d be happy to chime in! I’ve learned a lot so far and I’d love to share he positive.

What kind of work does he do?

There is too much negative stuff about autism/neurodiversity. There are also too many people with a negative worldview. Perhaps understandable, but you cannot build a positive relationship with lots of negativity.

There should be a forum with a positive view of neurodiverse-neurodiverse relationships that can teach people useful strategies. And then I don't mean the strategies that are needed in mixed relationships that often are viewing the neurodiverse part as the source of all the problems.

My wife and I would analyze social situations and offer helpful advice on what to do. Sometimes Aspies miss the very obvious. Of course, I would just listen, as she was more interested someone listening than getting advice. Chances are, your Aspie would also like such analysis. We tend to over-analyze things.