I'm putting this on my POF account.

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Check it out below, what changes should I make? I also don't have a car because I can't afford one, so I'm going to be honest about it if they ask. If I'm going to drive them to the date and I'm gonna tell them they have to be the driver.

I'm looking for my other half. I'm looking for someone who likes to share good conversation, good music, good food and good times. I don't think I'm asking too much. We all deserve happiness, right? I guess I'm a hopeless romantic. Ladies, genuine men do exist.

I am looking for a woman who can make me laugh, is honest, caring, compassionate, hard working, great personality, and will be my partner, my lover, and my best friend.

I think we are all single for a reason...but I'm sure we would all like to change that if we could. I guess I'm looking for someone to smile at me when I can't stop smiling, finish my sentences, laugh at my jokes and someone to cuddle with at night.

I can't quite put my finger on it, but I don't like the sentence, "Ladies, genuine men do exist." I guess if I had to say, it's making a claim that it's kind of up to the reader to determine. But I don't want to act like everyone would think of it the way I do. I dunno.

you talk about what you want from a woman but not what you have to offer her

This sounds off. Like you're arguing with someone you've not even met yet. Its too confrontational for an introduction.


This just sounds entitled. You're demanding and offering nothing.


You're playing the victim. Its not romantic. It sounds manipulative. "Take pity on me."


Arrogant. What makes you the bees knees?


Why say this? Hey, there's something wrong with you baby but that's ok with me. Negging. Don't neg.

Your whole thing sounds needy. You're saying what you want, but not what you have to offer. You're probably not selfish, but this whole thing comes over as selfish and like you want someone to fill all your wants and desires, but all you have to do is exist and offer nothing in return.

Frankly, I have never came across a dating profile, men or women, who put "what they have to offer". They all say what they're seeking for.

Maybe thats where these guys are all going wrong.

Have you never used Match.com?

I have, and have posted such. But as hurtloam notes, not doing it is where -people generally- go wrong (and then whine to their friends that no one is responding to their profile )

Nope, tried Okcupid , skout, and POF - and I recall that in both don't offer a "What I offer" section. There's 'About me', "hobbies" , and 'you should message me if" and other silly stuff.

I have seen maybe hundreds of profiles (women, since I am hetero) - and the usual pattern I've seen in 99% of them : the wants and the boundaries; so I am sure what I am talking about - I recall no woman who ever wrote something like "I can offer to the future partner X and Y" ....like NEVER.

Ah i see what you're saying. Yeah, I was thinking that the OP was lacking noting his interests.

Surely people should say what they'd like to do as interests and what they are like. Maybe something like "I really enjoy cooking and trying out new recipes." Bit cliche for a woman maybe, but that would make me interested in a man.

Saying things like you want a nice, honest person with a good personality is a bit redundant. Everyone wants that.

But it's really not a good idea to lead in with slightly argumentative condescending language.

I put what I had to offer in my pros. I used lots of different dating sites & had been on them for a long time so I tried different things. Most everyone who read my pros in the last couple years I was using dating sites agreed that I wrote things really well & that included lots of online women friends including 1s I made from the dating sites. I still never gotten a single date thou or even thought I had the potential for a date or a romantic relationship. All the women who messaged me 1st messaged me because they liked something I said in my pro or were curious about something & lots were looking for friends but they made it very clear in the 1st couple messages that they were not interested in anything more than friendship with me. I think my problem is I'm very unique & since I have a couple major disabilities, the things I have to offer & wanted within a relationship were things most women were not interested in. They may of liked the idea of those things but they were not sexually attracted by it. They pretty much saw me as someone who might could be a friend that they use to complain to about things.

I agree with all of hurtloam's critiques. Also DMA, you mention things like good food, good conversation, & great personality but those things are all relative. Good & Great could mean very different & sometimes even opposite things to different people & you do not explain what you find good or great.

I was thinking this. I mean everyone likes good conversation, good food, good music, and good times. Maybe be a bit more specific.

"Ladies, genuine men do exist."
If nothing else, change that line.

Instead of "good" music, say what specific kinds of music you like. Everyone thinks their own favorite kind of music is "good" and thinks some other people's favorite kinds of music are "bad."

Ditto for food. Are there any particular kinds of food you especially like or dislike?

Also be more specific about what you mean by "good conversation" and "good times." What kinds of things do you like to talk about, and what kinds of (non-sexual) activities constitute "good times" for you?


As at least one other person in this thread has advised, I think you should remove "Ladies, genuine men do exist." I think you should remove all of the above three sentences, in fact.


Be more specific about what you mean by "great personality."


If you want someone to "laugh at your jokes," you need someone with a compatible sense of humor. If you can think of a way to briefly characterize your particular sense of humor and how it may differ from the average person's sense of humor, do so.

My first impression was "too generic". I agree with a lot of what the posters above have said.

Too obvious, you're on a dating site. Stating the blatantly obvious makes you come off like a simpleton.

DevilMayAsian wrote:

I'm looking for someone who likes to share good conversation, good music, good food and good times.

You haven't defined what "good" means for any of these. What is good conversation to you? Good music? Good food? Good times?

DevilMayAsian wrote:

I don't think I'm asking too much. We all deserve happiness, right? I guess I'm a hopeless romantic. Ladies, genuine men do exist.

I'd just remove that entirely. There is nothing about even questioning whether you are deserving of what you're looking for on a dating site that is compelling, and at worst it will make you appear desperate. Also, calling yourself a genuine guy the way you did makes it seem like you think you're better than other guys, and you're not.

DevilMayAsian wrote:

I am looking for a woman who can make me laugh, is honest, caring, compassionate, hard working, great personality, and will be my partner, my lover, and my best friend.

As others have said, you say what you're looking for in a woman, but you don't mention much about yourself to help the women determine if you're what they're looking for. Also, you haven't clarified what "great personality" means to you. If you take anything away from this post, it should be to not use a bunch of generalities on your profile.

DevilMayAsian wrote:

I think we are all single for a reason...but I'm sure we would all like to change that if we could. I guess I'm looking for someone to smile at me when I can't stop smiling, finish my sentences, laugh at my jokes and someone to cuddle with at night.

There is no positive way to interpret that top sentence, so I'd get rid of it. Overall I think you'd benefit from coming off as more confident in your dating profile.

The way I see it, writing a dating profile is like trying to advertise a product (yourself) and purchase a product (the girl) so you're looking to let people know what you're looking for while also showing off your best qualities.

In POF, delete the whole text, just list interests in the relevant part, and put many good photos. The less you bla bla , the better.


And oh, show us the photos.

I totally agree. It was so tiring reading endless women with very high opinions of themselves act like they were perfect and had a long laundry list they expected you to meet. By the end, I was yelling at the computer "what do YOU have to offer ME?" It was almost like reading a job posting. The last time I saw a profile of someone who did mention what they offered, I messaged her even though I wasn't the least bit attracted to her interests. We are still married and now have a baby.

OP, if you REALLY want to stand out instead of saying:
"I am looking for a woman who can make me laugh, is honest, caring, compassionate, hard working, great personality, and will be my partner, my lover, and my best friend."
Why not show those traits through your own profile? I know when I changed my profile to be "like everyone else" sure I got many more dates but they were all a waste of time because the dates were solely focused on the one thing that stood out (height) and not my genuine personality, kind nature, sense of loyalty or *ahem* other adult things.

I would also suggest getting off POF but I digress. The last time I was at a house party we actually looked at POF and other similar sites to laugh at the bad profiles. Only a small handful didn't elicit chuckles.