Torn About Complicated Relationship

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It has been a long time since I've posted here. During that time, my life has been tumultuous. Over the past two years, I've watched my father grow weaker and finally dying in late February. My mother and I are now living with my sister in another state, and things are topsy-turvier.
And my estranged marriage is coming back to haunt me.
I've been separated from my wife for almost 13 years. We've both had relationships since, but every time I tried to get the divorce, life would somehow get in the way.
She was with me at my father's memorial service, and we did sleep together (though no real intimacy occurred). She was there for two days. Then, I visited her a month later for a week in her current home state. We've been talking reconciliation.
But now I am gravely concerned about the matter.
On the minor problem side, I really don't like where she lives. It is in the mountains, and the nearest cities with any good medical facilities is over forty miles (64 km) distant. As for mental health care, there is only one affordable resource in the area, and she sees him.
The major problem is simply us.
Our marriage fell apart. There were so many problems. She is quite a bit younger. Politically, we're pretty much opposites. And then there is how I feel as though she doesn't value much of what I say or do.
I care for her, and I do not want to see her get hurt, but I'm at a loss.
Reconciling would be for her feelings, but I am putting myself at risk.
I guess I know what I need to do, but I needed somewhere to sound off.

I can't really provide any advice, but your thread did remind me about one of my co-workers. He and his wife were on opposite sides of the political spectrum. The presidential election of 1984 pitted incumbent President Ronald Reagan and Vice President George H. W. Bush against Walter Mondale for president with Geraldine Ferraro as his Vice President. During the election my co-worker had one of the most unusual bumper sticker that I have ever seen. It read Reagan/Ferraro. They had taken two bumper stickers cut them in half and joined them together. I suspect that when it actually came to casting their votes for the election, they probably cancelled each others votes out.

Interesting.
I remember the election of '84. Weird time for me.
Anyway, in this polarized environment, I suspect we'd be at each others' throats in know time.
Right now, having to digest another spanner that has been thrown into the works. Going to share that in another section of the Forum...

Since what you know what you need to do, I am witness to your sounding off. I am sorry for the difficult times and the complications. Wishing you well as you move forward.

If you've been unhappy enough to be separated for 13 years, I doubt it will ever improve enough for both of you to be content with the relationship. I know it's more comfortable to be complacent with what you've been doing for years and the unknown of really being single is probably pretty frightening. But I think you'll both be better off.

You have to take care of yourself first. From what you've written, that's not complicated at all.

(((VagabondAstronomer)))

Thanks for all the replies, folks. Pretty sure what it is I need to do, painful as it is. The past 120 hours of my life have been hard enough for me, and that just adds to it.
Sigh.
Anyway, many thanks. Going to hang with my pet rabbit for a bit and prepare for the night ahead.