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who here is married/in a relationship with another aspie?

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Chain
Snowy Owl
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02 Jul 2020, 12:00 pm

Pepe wrote:
Chain wrote:
I consider myself very lucky to be married to someone on the spectrum. We get each other pretty well :)

Is anyone else here married to a fellow aspie?


I luv myself profoundly,
But I have an aversion to commitment,
So, no. :mrgreen:

BTW,
Do you have kids?


I have kids from a previous marriage when I was married to a respect driven woman. My current wife and I don't have children together.


_________________
I may use terms that are part of my theory of "Functional Cognitive Typology". Diagnosis is always a mixed bag but generally they map to the cognitive type when in dysfunction:
C = Cultural (NT), EC = Extra-Cultural (ASD)
U = understanding ~ ADD/ADHD
A = acceptance ~ baseline, normal
T = trust ~ possible schizotypal disorder
R = respect ~ NPD
C = cerebral (adrenaline averse), S = somatic (adrenaline seeking)

I am ECUC/S (cusp cerebral/somatic)


Chain
Snowy Owl
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02 Jul 2020, 12:03 pm

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
I notice a pattern here: A lot of married men here are married with women of cultures different than theirs - in case the wife is not aspie.


My current wife is Vietnamese and aspie. Extra-Culturals are are attracted to people of very different genetics. This is due to the gene spreading nature of AS (EC). ADDers have this as well. I am both so....


_________________
I may use terms that are part of my theory of "Functional Cognitive Typology". Diagnosis is always a mixed bag but generally they map to the cognitive type when in dysfunction:
C = Cultural (NT), EC = Extra-Cultural (ASD)
U = understanding ~ ADD/ADHD
A = acceptance ~ baseline, normal
T = trust ~ possible schizotypal disorder
R = respect ~ NPD
C = cerebral (adrenaline averse), S = somatic (adrenaline seeking)

I am ECUC/S (cusp cerebral/somatic)


Chain
Snowy Owl
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02 Jul 2020, 12:06 pm

SharonB wrote:
To the original poster Chain: in retrospect, my first love was ASD-like. We were both undiagnosed; he may still be. The relationship did not continue (communication failure), but it was valuable - I remember it fondly.

To Face of Boo's theory: When I dated someone within my culture they were ASD-like. I married an NT, who is an immigrant from a very different culture. My ASD-like BFF found a partner in her 40s: an NT immigrant from a very different culture. Interestingly, my ASD-like ex married an immigrate (NT? ASD?) from a different culture too! I have an ASD co-worker who married within his culture: also ASD. My ASD-like mom bucked that theory and married an NT within her culture, but she says she had limited options (and is currently addicted to a foreign TV soap).


This is how it works as predicted in Functional Cognitive Typology. I explained the mechanism in another thread.
I have the best of both worlds... a foreign aspie :)


_________________
I may use terms that are part of my theory of "Functional Cognitive Typology". Diagnosis is always a mixed bag but generally they map to the cognitive type when in dysfunction:
C = Cultural (NT), EC = Extra-Cultural (ASD)
U = understanding ~ ADD/ADHD
A = acceptance ~ baseline, normal
T = trust ~ possible schizotypal disorder
R = respect ~ NPD
C = cerebral (adrenaline averse), S = somatic (adrenaline seeking)

I am ECUC/S (cusp cerebral/somatic)


cyberdad
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02 Jul 2020, 5:58 pm

Chain wrote:
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
I notice a pattern here: A lot of married men here are married with women of cultures different than theirs - in case the wife is not aspie.


My current wife is Vietnamese and aspie. Extra-Culturals are are attracted to people of very different genetics. This is due to the gene spreading nature of AS (EC). ADDers have this as well. I am both so....


Add another one to the foreign wife list Boo



SharonB
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02 Jul 2020, 9:58 pm

Chain wrote:
This is how it works as predicted in Functional Cognitive Typology. I explained the mechanism in another thread.
I have the best of both worlds... a foreign aspie :)

Ha!

Do you have the link handy? If not, I can search for it.



SharonB
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03 Jul 2020, 9:33 am

Thought of another one: recently got in touch with a distant cousin (on my ASD-like mom's side), and his profession and correspondence --- and his marriage outside his culture --- has me 95% convinced he is ASD, ND in the least.

Although my husband is not ASD, I wonder how "NT" he is. Sometimes I think he's more anti-social than I am and my score for social motivation was a mere 4% of normal. He has an easier time of it when he does interacts with others, but... something.



The_Face_of_Boo
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03 Jul 2020, 10:58 am

cyberdad wrote:
Chain wrote:
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
I notice a pattern here: A lot of married men here are married with women of cultures different than theirs - in case the wife is not aspie.


My current wife is Vietnamese and aspie. Extra-Culturals are are attracted to people of very different genetics. This is due to the gene spreading nature of AS (EC). ADDers have this as well. I am both so....


Add another one to the foreign wife list Boo


It is getting long...



The_Face_of_Boo
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03 Jul 2020, 11:03 am

Chain reminds me of a less attractive version of Vin Diesel.



Chain
Snowy Owl
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03 Jul 2020, 1:16 pm

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
Chain reminds me of a less attractive version of Vin Diesel.


Hahaha! Vin Diesel has nothing on me, lol!


_________________
I may use terms that are part of my theory of "Functional Cognitive Typology". Diagnosis is always a mixed bag but generally they map to the cognitive type when in dysfunction:
C = Cultural (NT), EC = Extra-Cultural (ASD)
U = understanding ~ ADD/ADHD
A = acceptance ~ baseline, normal
T = trust ~ possible schizotypal disorder
R = respect ~ NPD
C = cerebral (adrenaline averse), S = somatic (adrenaline seeking)

I am ECUC/S (cusp cerebral/somatic)


Chain
Snowy Owl
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Joined: 24 Jun 2005
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Location: Portland, Oregon

03 Jul 2020, 1:30 pm

SharonB wrote:
Chain wrote:
This is how it works as predicted in Functional Cognitive Typology. I explained the mechanism in another thread.
I have the best of both worlds... a foreign aspie :)

Ha!

Do you have the link handy? If not, I can search for it.


Here is the link. It is a quick overview of the initial evolutionary model for ASD
Remember, I do not see it as a disorder but a functionality. Life is driven by function, not order or disorder.

viewtopic.php?f=8&t=386584&p=8556383#p8556383


_________________
I may use terms that are part of my theory of "Functional Cognitive Typology". Diagnosis is always a mixed bag but generally they map to the cognitive type when in dysfunction:
C = Cultural (NT), EC = Extra-Cultural (ASD)
U = understanding ~ ADD/ADHD
A = acceptance ~ baseline, normal
T = trust ~ possible schizotypal disorder
R = respect ~ NPD
C = cerebral (adrenaline averse), S = somatic (adrenaline seeking)

I am ECUC/S (cusp cerebral/somatic)


HirkEukvic
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03 Jul 2020, 7:56 pm

Chain wrote:
I consider myself very lucky to be married to someone on the spectrum. We get each other pretty well :)

Is anyone else here married to a fellow aspie?


Yes (though she doesn't have an official diagnosis, it's pretty likely that she's aspie). Been married 9 months now and it's been magical.



Chain
Snowy Owl
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04 Jul 2020, 3:43 pm

HirkEukvic wrote:
Chain wrote:
I consider myself very lucky to be married to someone on the spectrum. We get each other pretty well :)

Is anyone else here married to a fellow aspie?


Yes (though she doesn't have an official diagnosis, it's pretty likely that she's aspie). Been married 9 months now and it's been magical.


That makes my heart feel very happy!


_________________
I may use terms that are part of my theory of "Functional Cognitive Typology". Diagnosis is always a mixed bag but generally they map to the cognitive type when in dysfunction:
C = Cultural (NT), EC = Extra-Cultural (ASD)
U = understanding ~ ADD/ADHD
A = acceptance ~ baseline, normal
T = trust ~ possible schizotypal disorder
R = respect ~ NPD
C = cerebral (adrenaline averse), S = somatic (adrenaline seeking)

I am ECUC/S (cusp cerebral/somatic)


SharonB
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05 Jul 2020, 4:56 pm

Happy :heart:

:)