I’m Never Going To Find Love

Post Reply New Topic

I’m going to be alone forever.

have you tried dating apps??

Being a romantic idealist, I believe that there is love out there, that special someone for everyone. I have been alone for a number of years and yet I remain hopeful. Try not to dwell on being alone and move along with your life. Sometimes love happens when you least expect it. Please don't loose hope.

Based on how you write and your posts I've read - you sound like you have the personality and skills to find love. Some AS women are not what my bad therapist called 'relatable', but you sound quite relatable as in saying and thinking things to relate to your mate, and I think things will work out for you.. you need to put effort into it and you need luck too, but it sounds possible!

NT, here...Please do not lose hope...And allow me to share my story...I am a romantic at heart...I was 15 when i first fell deeply in love with my neighbor...He wanted to marry me when he was only 17 years young...The feeling was mutual, but i wanted to focus on my academic goals...Suffice to say, shortly after, he disappointed me greatly...Said disappointment marked me...My heart was so broken that although i had various other suiters, i could not give myself a chance with any of them...Though i did tried...By age 25, after 3 failed attempts to fall in love, i decided to stop trying...And i stopped dating completely!! !...Instead, i decided to continue to focus on my personal goals which revolved around my immediate family, my pursue of a higher education and my religious activities...I had many, many, many true friends to fill the emptiness in my heart...However, by my early thirties, my maternal instinct was strong...And just when i was thinking about adopting a child, circumstances required me to help in the rearing of two little ones, my beloved niece and my beloved nephew...They filled my heart with joy for the one decade that i helped raise them as my own...So, between all the above-mentioned activities and obligations, i sincerely had no time to feel pity for me for not having found true love...All the while, my extended Mexican family kept reminding me how miserable i must be for not having found "the One"...But i only knew singleness and had no point of comparison, so i honestly did not know what i was missing...I was determined to make the best of being single and not become bitter...I had an enviable social life...it was only after experiencing a series of personal tragedies--fires, auto-accidents, health issues, loss of loved ones, etc., that i felt a strong desire to have a companion...And so, late 2016, i prayed for a husband...Shortly after in early 2017, when i had forgotten about my specific prayer and was happiest than ever in my life, i met he who became my beloved husband...I was then in my late forties...At present-time, i am 50 and have been happily married for less than two years...So, DON'T EVER UNDER-ESTIMATE THE POWER OF PRAYER...Believe it or not, said prayer was NOT an act of faith but an act of desperation, because by then, i did NOT believe the man for me existed!! !...However, i learned that God created our heart with the capacity to heal completely...Of course, i am referring to our figurative heart, the center of our emotions...Now, looking back, i am grateful to God that when young i failed in my search for love, because frankly, i could NOT imagine myself married to anyone else other than my beloved husband who just happens to be the most handsome Aspie...I always joke that my wedding banner should have read "Finally Married" instead of "Just married" ...So if "the One" i waited for finally found me (I never search for him), then there is HOPE for you...

WHY do you feel that you will be alone forever?

(I took a quick look at the recent threads listed on your profile, and saw that you have also been in a lot of physical pain lately, according to this thread in The Haven. Are you feeling any better physically now?)

A little bit, I’m sitting down ALOT, I have a recliner chair. I been using my wheelchair to get around, I have a walker too, so I been taking very good care of myself, but it’s more harder taking care of a cat.

I hope your condition continues to improve.

Are your physical difficulties one of the main reasons why you feel that you will never find love? Or is it mainly something else?

You will eventually find that special someone, you just have to be patient.

Kitty, i've often seen you post here about a new guy you're talking to quite frequently. Might I warn you that your ability to pair bond might be broken? It's not that you can't find love, it's that you don't want to.

Pair-bonding doesn't correspond to a 'perfect guy', or one of great stature, that's why it's hard for people to settle down because they're looking for perfection, but perfection doesn't exist. Humans tends to pair bond to their first, but when their first is squandered then they're left with an impression that they're looking for perfection, but humans don't pair bond by merits but by chastity. This is how relationships survive tuberlance because circumstances in life come and go, and those relationships which were found for ease will perish by hardship. Hence we're not looking for one that might make our lives easier, but tolerable, and fidelity is what makes life tolerable. Though hardships will always remain. And paradoxically enough it's ease that tends to threaten relationships moreso than hardships since ease destroys character, whereas hardships refine it. Don't look for guys of merit that might grant you ease, look for guys of fidelity, who will remain loyal to you. Though they might be small and not so glamorous.

Guys seem interested enough in talking to you; but are you interested in talking to --A-- GUY? Either guys are moving on form you or you are moving on from guys. They seem interested enough to engage you in conversation but something is preventing this from being sustained and at this point I don't think they are entirely to blame. You have to settle with one with all his flaws and defects. That's what we ALL do.

I’m on Coffee Meets Bagel & Badoo dating apps, I am talking to guys on Badoo. I’m following Coffee Meets Bagel on Instagram, guys from there are sending me friend requests & wanting to talk to me, some of them wasn’t real, I had a friend request from a woman that wanted to set me up with her uncle, LOL.

I can hear Fnord's voice in my head saying: The common denominator is.....

Every situation is different

"Never" takes into account all the situations

If it is possible for you to find love, what method?

If it is not possible , what's the next best thing?

Dude, those are ALL a straight up SCAM if you're a guy.

Dude, those are ALL a straight up SCAM if you're a guy.

Tbh, probably not. But it’s not the end of the world if you never find someone. You have to be able to be happy with yourself.