I Got Bored So I Signed Up For A Filipino Dating Site.

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Ohh boy..

I'm married to a Filipina that I met online 15 years ago, after having online relationships with several.
Be a little careful. Some (many) are going to create a fake relationship with you, get you to send them some money every month, and spend it with their boyfriends. If they ask for money, I'd be gone. That simple.

Some are amazing people.

Most are incredibly desperate to leave. They're stuck there and marrying a foreigner is their way out. You'll easily be able to find an attractive girl to marry you. No doubt.

But will you be happy with her? Will she be happy with you? Pinay women are very headstrong. And they are very good at manipulation. Most Filipino men treat women terribly, so many women have built-in defensive mechanisms that make them always keep the edge in the relationship. You'll find yourself exhausting yourself to keep them happy, but it's never enough. There's a reason men there die very young.

I don't want to dissuade you. Some women there are fantastic. Just make sure she is smart and legitimately sweet before you commit. Don't hesitate if you have any questions.

Update:

In January and February, I signed up for FilipinoCupid again and this time, I used the website every single day and probably messaged close to 500+ women during this time period. Maybe around a dozen of them advanced to the messaging each other on Facebook stage, and eventually lead to audio and video calls as well. The vast majority of these women would fizzle out within a week to a month after I either lost interest, they lost interest, or the feelings were mutual.

In January, I video called with two girls. Both of them were singers and musicians (I'm also a musician) and both were very attractive, easily some of the most attractive women I've met and talked to on the app. However, both fizzled out within a month. Girl #1 ghosted me after revealing that i'm still a college student so most likely she was a gold digger or looking for an older and financially stable guy. Girl #2 was very hot with a pretty face and long curly hair, but she was hard to talk to during video calls, and admitted she wasn't looking for anything and was on the site for entertainment. I wound up blocking her after she left me on read many times and it was pretty clear that she wasn't too interested. I also talked to another girl and we both shared a love of exercising but after flaking on me too many times and agreeing to video chat with me but simply not showing up without telling me, I got upset with her and she eventually ghosted me.




Currently, iv'e been talking to two different girls which both of them I met in February. Both enjoy action movies, video games, are college students, and both are easy to talk to. Girl #1 is more quiet and attentive while Girl #2 is much more extroverted, funny, and lively. Both would make great partners but I like Girl #2 a little better because I am more physically attracted to her. However, if Girl #2 doesn't workout, Girl #1 would make an excellent partner as well.

Is it really narcissism though, if they are doing it for survival? I understand like why it seems like a sh*tty thing to do, but for some of them they really could be facing a dire future and they might think it is the only way to make their life better. Like I guess I can sorta see where those women are coming from a bit even though I acknowledge it can be sh*tty and messed up towards the guy they might string along. But also some maybe do really want a relationship with the guy but maybe when they actually make the move over they realize it's not someone they really want to spend the rest of their life with.

Like i met my boyfriend online and when we finally met in person and spent more time together I knew there was a chance we might find that we weren't really that into each other and also when we moved in together I was excited about it but I did know there was a chance we wouldn't like living together and could still break up. So I figure that could happen if a woman looking to marry abroad finally makes the trip, she might find she doesn't like living with them.

Though the darker side of this kind of thing is, some men may seek out marrying a woman from a poorer country. With the intent of not allowing them to leave or to control them, like they know some of them may just be willing to marry for a green card but they don't intend to actually let them leave. So there is the risk of just ending up stuck as a sex slave essentially.

I don't know exactly what's going on in the Philippines.
I'm just speaking on behalf of the Chinese about a problem that "may" exist in the rest of East/Southeast Asia.

Some Chinese people have a strong "reverse racism", that is, they subconsciously believe that things that are "not our nation" are superior. And vehemently hates all imprints of one's own race/culture/identity.
Sexual selection is but one of the most intuitive manifestations of this deplorable culture.

The preference of a small number of women (and gay men) for foreign men can no longer be explained by motives for material gain.
Because this preference includes those regions whose economies are actually inferior to ours: Eastern Europe, Africa, India/Pakistan.
And some groups apply much lower mate selection criteria for foreigners than for natives.
And AFAIK, some individuals even unilaterally pay for foreign boyfriends. This is extremely unusual in our current culture.

In China, the origin of this culture is quite complex, but the history of being colonized is an important factor.
The history of the Philippines being colonized is even more profound.

Last edited by SkinnedWolf on 08 May 2022, 10:16 am, edited 1 time in total.

^ It is much simpler than all that.

True love knows no boundaries, whether political, racial, sexual, or traditional. People will love whom they love, and the rest of us should learn to accept it.

^I never deny that "true love" or something else you would call exists. I am also building inter-racial/nationality relationships myself.
I dont interfere with individual choices and have acted against those who interfere with such choices.

But certain other factors will dilute its proportions. This is a clear reflection on a statistical level.
East Asians, especially men, tend to make generalizations about women who are interracial dating. This is the social pressure placed on the individuals who make these choices.
This is because(at least in part) there are indeed obvious "samples" from which they generalize to other individuals.

That's exactly my explanation of the OP's confusion.


I know what may have happened to your family, Fnord.
Knowing why will better allow you to help her face the difficulties. And covering up the problem can't.
You can't expect every individual to be loving and peaceful when problems do exist.

Oh, really?



Is this an act of prophesy or just a lead-in to a bit of character assassination?

You yourself have mentioned your struggles with some people who insulted your relationship. on WP.
And I have read it before.
That's literally what it means.

While it is gratifying to know I have such a devoted fan, it also seems necessary to point out to you that I hate racism, sexism, and any other kind of bigotry.

I am not terribly fond of people who express those hatreds, either.

Even if I'm reporting an inappropriate racist act? Although this racism seems to be manifested in the opposite way.

I just read most the postings of two particular members (excluding you) and some fragments in those same threads. Used to study social norms that I am not so familiar with. That's all.
I have an uncontrollable memory for some information.

By all means, report any bigotry you may find. The sooner we get rid of bigotry, the better off we will all be.

I signed up for its counterpart latincupid it was all scammers. They had the same script

-Hola
-What exactly are you looking for here?

a bit of conversation and then a request for money.

The way they wrote it seemed like it was a man writing the texts.

Like 'what exactly are you looking for here' seems like something a man would write.

I started asking them for video chat to troll them a bit. One of them put a video of a woman on the video chat but then made excuses why she wasnt talking.
Another one said 'she' was using her mothers computer and therefore didnt have a camera. That is like a 2004 excuse because smartphones are so cheap and available nowadays....and 'she' had photos on 'her' account.

It's funny because iv'e never had a woman ask me for money, not even one. It helps that i'm still relatively young, i'm only 27, and was 26 when I first signed up and I also have in my profile that i'm a college student. So maybe the women who are just in it for the money would avoid me since they simply see me as a young college student without a lot of money anyways.


I also write in my profile that i'm not looking to send anybody any money under any circumstances, so gold diggers may read my profile and stay away. Also when the topic of what we're looking for in the site comes up, I always mention that I'm not interested in sending anybody any money which one again, anybody who's in it for the money will probably ghost me shortly afterwards since I would be wasting their time.


I also don't message women who only have 1 picture in their profile as they're more likely to be a catfish for obvious reasons. The more pictures, the better the chance that their profile is real. Finally, I avoid women who ask to skype in their first message. The way Skype scams work is they send you a bunch of nudes and try to get you to undress on Skype, and they secretly record you without your consent. Afterwards, they blackmail you and threaten to send to your family unless you pay them money.



I did have one woman who I suspected to be a catfish. She NEVER wanted to video chat and after 3 months of talking, I finally ghosted her. Luckily, I didn't send her anything too personal. I also had a filipina "woman" attempt to scam me on OkCupid. She said that she works at an online business, and she can get me to make some money if I sign up for the app and call her boss to get set up. I looked the business up on Google and it came back as a high-risk high-scam website. So I told her that I wasn't interested and just a couple days later, I never heard from her again.

Wow yeah thank God I would not feel comfortable doing anything on video chat like that!
Maybe the Filipino website has more actual women for whatever reason.

FilipinoCupid definitely has actual women. It’s actually an advantage to be a man under 35 on that site since most men tend to be older. Your competition isn’t that great since young men going the international dating route is still fairly niche so it’s really not that hard to find women willing to talk to you. This isn’t American dating sites where you send out 100 messages and 1-2 responds back, it’s quite the opposite in Filipino land.

^ The sex ratio is certainly the opposite too.