I met someone special, and I may get engaged

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I met a wonderful latina (28 yrs old, and fully legal us citizen and immigrant) woman. Let's call her k. She is in law school for international and criminal law. She has a 3.99 GPA I am so proud of her. She also has a degree in translation and she speaks Spanish,english, portugeese, Italian, French, (I believe) mandarin chineese fluently. She also speaks german, korean, and Greek at a self admitted near intermediate level. She also loves to read and Try new things.

I am a 29 soon to be a 30 yr old "gringo" as she calls me. Her ethnicity doesn't matter but it plays into a way i was romantic. I met her through a dating app while I was going back to school for I.T. I am planning on finishing just life got in the way and I'm taking a 1 year break. We talked on there for a while then it graduated to video calls and talking on the phone alot and texting every day. we watch YouTube and shows on doscord when we have the time but we are both busy but we try to when we can. One day I decided to go see her. All together starting with talking on the app we have been involved for 19 months. only struggle is that she lives almost three hours away near where my brother lives. So we see each other in person like once every 3 weeks or so. Us being together more is a next step for us.

So.....At one point I got brave and told K I had aspergers. She said I want to learn about it so I can be a good partner and that a great guy like me "deserves to be loved and loved hard". So this prompted me to ask about her culture since alot of Latin/ Hispanic people are seemingly very proud of there heritage. she said she was peruvian and I said " I want to learn all about your culture and see if we cannot eat some peruvian food together and try all of it I'm not picky I'll even eat lama and nearly anything else."

Following this she bought me a gifts with highlights such as a travel guide to peru, a subscription to a peruvian snack box for 6 months , some peruvian inca cola and peruvian sauces. She has also bought me some clothes too. I bought her gifts too.

She is also actively teaching me Spanish since I'd like to learn to be able to do the seemingly impossible bilingual tech support which pays decently starting. This is a slow thing to help me have a head start before the I enroll in the language institute.

But anyways....

I Adore k she makes me happy no matther how sad i am. I like her because she is kind and gentle and fierce at the same time. K is beautiful and i crave her physically as much as i think about our next conversation, our next date and new things to try. She is the type of woman who pushes me to be a good man and better myself and i to her. For an example I'm even actively a part of an AA group and I'm 3 weeks sober and counting. I also had a 3.1 GPA in a Systems admin course. i mean it this time. I feel the same way about her as ozzy osbourne feels about Sharron. Its like he says "when you were on the floor struggling with cancer unable to stand up I didn't question picking you up and helping you into the bath."

Which brings me to the only struggles i have faced with her and i dont blame her. don't fret there is hope. She has ovarian issues and her hormones are out of whack. This leads to a compromised immune system and wildy intense periods . It doesn't stop there she has mental health struggles with depression,anxiety and isolating and shutting out the world and not eating much sometimes and if she eats it junk(which worries me). It breaks my heart to see her when it flares up or when she is sick with the flu or covid for the 1000th time. It just gets really hard when I wanna go out and do things and the conversation has to be "sweet k how are you feeling today" instead of "ok I will pick up at 6 and we will go see xyz. That's not to say we haven't gone out. Our best date was to go see Earth wind and fire and eat peruvian food after (omg you habe to.try it). I feel hopeful since she is on medication that helps physically. She sometimes gets slightly short with me when she doesn't feel well. we both are agree that her getting this procedure done soon she will feel better and not get upset. She doesn't mean it she is just not well. We think this too will help her mental health in the long tun / permanently. Speaking of mental health since my sister is a therapist i have asked her for pointers to help k not stress out... let's just say i owe my sister more than just one.


So if all goes well I am planning on getting a new car and a new place. I want to have her share in my happy moments with me ... I dream of waking up to her every night. Thats not even a lie. I am planning on buying a ring soon. My sister knows someone who can make it for me.

Lastly if all goes well im thinking of suggesting that we travel to peru and visit her cousins and her biological dad. I want to get in better shape so i can climb machu pichu and propose there. That said...She likes the step dad but her biological made amends for cheating on mom and being drunk. He is also in AA he is 10 years sober. He flew out to the usa to see her for her birthday. They have grown closer in recient years. He speaks alright English so asking if I'm ok to pop the question. I will be cute and propose in spanish since she thinks its cute when i speak spanish to her . I will say "k eres tu mi amor?... (wait for sí then continue on) Entonces, ¿serás mía para siempre?". Which translates to" k are you my love.(wait for her to say yes like you know she will then proceed) so then, will you be mine forever? " .... I'm sure all will be well since i have met her mom and I am like her second son now basicly. She said I answered her prayers and that she is happy for us.. also when am I gonna have little one to play with....
"She said look at my daughter k who wouldn't want to make babies with her she's beautiful and will have beautiful kids."

Omg I love my life....

That sounds great, congratulations.

Gratz !
Alpaca meat is fabulous..I wouldn't go for llama. If you ever order guinea pig ask for the head and feet to be removed. It is disconcerting having it stare at you and is quite an unrewarding meat...all bones.

That was a lovely story, and going to Peru with her sounds exciting. I would totally be up for emigrating to Peru. The cost of living is about half what it is in the U.S., and health care is more accessible too. I like the climate.

I think a lot of Americans are thinking about overseas life due to the cost of living.

She sounds impressive, and I always wonder about these "too good to be true" stories, like maybe there is something that does not quite meet the eye, like a Chinese spy, or a cartel employee, but maybe all is well too.

^ The mention of the possibility of the involvement of a Chinese spy or cartel employee made me lol!

Jokes aside, your story is very warm, happy and touching, OP. I hope things work out for you and I wish you the very best with your girlfriend.

We loved Peru too and would have been happy living there, although I'd avoid Lima if you like sunlight...and NEVER wear leather shoes there.

Well we plan on of things go well for us in the long run having a place or two we could go there like condos maybe one in miaflores and one else where in peru and a place here. Then when we don't use those put them up as air bnb's or VRBO. That's verses fully living there and my job may become more remote it's sounding like as time goes on... I will still be hybrid but largely remote

The more likely thing to happen is what happened to me and my wife. Where the other person may not be what you expect, but for more benign reasons related to being undiagnosed themselves or having cultural things that you wouldn't know to ask about. I was shocked to learn that I needed to ask what she'd be doing with the money she earned at her job as it hadn't occurred to me that she thought she was just going to keep all of it. And that her family would just keep giving her money forever even if she was choosing to be unemployed.

That's not to say that I think the OP is necessarily making a mistake, but I would exercise caution that when one, or both, potential life partners are ND, that it can make it a lot harder to know what you're getting yourself into as my wife, and this is according to her family, wasn't like this before we got married.

I don't mean to rain on your parade, but I would tread carefully. This sounds a little too good to be true.

Maybe stepping back and taking off the rose colored glasses would be good idea.

Many people are good at playing a character for a short period of time until they get what they want.

I hope I am wrong, but this is just my gut feeling.

Congrats on your happiness! May all your dreams come true <3
19 months is a good long time to be getting to know someone. You both sound committed to the relationship.

Do take a moment to realize living 3 hours apart is significant. Its not like you're all that far away but it does make a difference.

Would it be possible to move closer to her as a first step (before you popped the question)?
It's important to see if you two can coexist at closer quarters.

Marriage is a big step and having babies is even bigger. Take your time, savor getting to know her, there's no rush. This time is special.

Goid Luck and Best Wishes Kingem.....Many Happy Returns