Never been in love

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I dated some boys but I didn't feel anything. I liked them, I found them sexual, but I have never felt sth people call butterflies etc. I treated it all like today is, tomorrow not, so it's not worth to care. Or love is kind of weakness, if you love, you lose. And I can't lose.

I know Aspies have to realise that they feel and what it is. Sometimes I was thinking but it always resulted I like you, but I don't need. If you were gone, it will destroy my order, but it's nothing.

Maybe someday I will feel these things about which people say. Or maybe not. Maybe I'm love-retarded.

Anybody here also has it?

I never felt any butterflies either.

I don't know if I'm love ret*d.

Maybe butterflies aren't love.

Oh... so am I only one here who is love disable? Or at least can't realise this kind of feelings? Or maybe is afraid?

(impossible!)

Butterflies refers to "butterflies in one's stomach", which is a feeling in that part of the body that one gets when they are deeply attracted to someone.

I'm pretty sure I know exactly what she's talking about.

I've gotten butterflies before, but not always. I've also gotten along fine romantically with someone I haven't gotten butterflies for. Chemical acrobatics aren't always needed to share a nice bond with a person.

it got to the point where i just pretend to have them. kills me more and more inside but still beats being alone

Butterflies, IMO, represent lust, not love. For most people, these nervous butterflies go away not far into the relationship. After a while, the relationship is about loving the person for who s/he is, and not just the attraction.

Some people may still get butterflies every once in a while when some sort of romance is triggered, but a lot don't.

I've been in love
I am sure what that was, was love
ya know

You can't really think about the concept of love purely logically as you seem to be attempting, because it won't work. The reason for that is simply that love isn't logical at all. And, its a complex thing to even define.

I think this is how it works: you know when you feel it, simple as that. If you haven't felt that before, its most likely because you haven't met the right person for it yet.

Obviously, life isn't like in the movies, no one is guaranteed to feel love. But from what I gather, it does happen for most people. I can't say much in respect of you personally, simply because I don't know you. But, if love is what you desire, I wish you the best of luck in finding it!

Cor blimey and stone the crows, you sound like my kind of girl. As long as you found the boys sexual that's the main thing.

Go ahead and have fun and enjoy not being bogged down by counterproductive emotions!

I have a (NT) friend who has never fallen in love in his entire life, and he's about 40. like myself. He is now married, two kids, he loves his wife and all is fine. He also used to have a fair amount of girlfriends, before (nothing Casanova-like at all, just about a dozen somewhat serious relationships).

Anyhow, turns out this falling in love-business isn't necessarily mandatory?

I, OTOH, am the kind of guy that does fall in love. But strangely enough, I ended marrying the girl I did not really fall in love with. Not head-over-heels as they say, in any case.

I have never felt this kind of thing either. It bothered me when i was younger, but i don't really care anymore. I don't need romance to make me happy.

once someone explains it to me in a way I understand, I'll let you know if I ever felt it

I've loved people but never been loved back.

You have a lot of years ahead of you yet, so don't despair.