Turned down because of drugs.

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on a dating site I am on me and this girl share over 95% of things in common/ same anwers to th test questions. She might even be a bigger fan of our hobbies than I am. I sent her a nice worded email about wanting to chat asked her a few questions about this show or this book or what she thought when this happened and asked her about a ring tone she said she had I been looking forever for. I got nothing back but she did look at my profile so it must have cought her eye. I asked her in a new email why I failed her screening and all she said was "sorry, I dont date people that do not smoke pot" Really thats her answer? there are so many people out there that would not date someone for smoking pot and if there was she would not be on a daing site. yet because I dont do it I am not good enough for her? where is the logic in this?

She may feel that way because she really enjoys smoking pot and is afraid that because you don't, that you would be judgemental about her smoking. Still it was rude of her to just rule you out without really talking to you about it. If you really like her, and if you are ok with her smoking, maybe you could message her letting her know that you are not judgemental about it and it's just not something you do. She may tell you more about how she feels, and that can only be good if you are considering trying a relationship with her.

She may also have considered this a "nice" way of turning you down when she has already has a boyfriend.

It happens.

Or maybe she rejected you because she knows you won't know where to get pot and buy it for her. It's illegal, too, and it says something about your personality that you don't deal with the glamorous and exciting criminal underworld, and are perhaps not equipped to deal with all the treachery etc. that sometimes goes with operating outside the law.

http://www.annarbor.com/news/crime/man-shot-wednesday-night-in-downtown-ann-arbor-during-drug-deal/

Or maybe she smokes so much of it that it's a significant financial burden, which someone, who doesn't smoke it, is likely to complain about.

I think it depends on where you're from as well. I live in California, and smoking pot isn't that much more of a vice than drinking alcohol. I can imagine a similar response if the other person enjoyed social drinking and you did not.

On a side note, them damn percentages don't mean jack. I've had high percentages on OkCupid, went on several one-off dates, and it felt like there was zero connection between us.

I can't speak for others, but as far as I am concerned, it is much more difficult to date or be friends with someone who doesn't smoke, but I hold ganja in a different light than most people, and it forms a big part of my life and beliefs. We seek to share the things we enjoy the most in our relationships, and with such a controversial subject as that, it's just as likely that if someone doesn't share your interest they'll prosecute you for it as well.

That doesn't mean I wouldn't date someone that doesn't smoke, but I would feel incomplete if I couldn't share my favorite thing with my favorite person.

smoking marijuana helped me with my anxiety when I use to smoke it back in my 20's. Trust me its not that bad. You might find it helps with your autism.

Fnord. why would she be using a dating site if she already had a guy?

MisterJ. I dont smoke but I do not judge those who do. I did tell her this.


Todesking. no I do not drink or smoke or do pot.

Think of this way, I am an extremely picky eater and I hate wine so I could see being turned down by a foodie or a wine connoisseur even if I was very compatible in every other way. If you aren't 420 friendly and it's something she is looking for in a date then getting turned down is certainly something I wouldn't take personally. I would expect to see this happening more and more on dating sites if you live in parts of the world that have legalized medical marijuana or have lax drug laws. They even have dating sites for pot smokers.

http://www.annarbor.com/news/pittsfield-township-shooting-victim-remains-in-critical-condition/

More glamorous drug-related activity from my area. What are the implications for those who have trouble with reading people?

Those of you that have seen my older posts know how I feel about drugs. Trust me, you are better off without a drug user.

If you worry about why random strangers turned you down for a date on an anonymous website, you will make yourself feel crazy.

You will get continually turned down, for weird or nonexistent reasons, or more likely you'll get no response at all.

So you may as well chalk it up to internet dating syndrome, and leave it at that, than wonder about someone's real motivations who you'll never meet.

More often than not the reason someone turned you down is made-up by them, and that same girl will just as likely wind up married to a person who won't allow her to smoke pot at all.

I came into this thread expecting to read about someone being turned down because he was using drugs. I had to read the OP two times before I figured out it was the other way around. Weird.

I generally haven't found people who do drugs to be awfully critical of people who don't do drugs (more often, it's the other way around) but I guess it could happen. If she feels that strongly about drugs, you're probably better off without her, though.

Don't worry about it, you don't wanna date a pothead anyway. :/