At what stage in a relationship....

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should one reveal their spectrum issues?

Wow....I really do not have a logical response to such a qeustion. When I told the last girl that I dated about me having asperger syndrome she didnt belive me for unknown reasons she never told me why its like they think your telling them you have something mentaly wrong with you at least...Thats how it feels

That's what I was afraid of, Joker. Thanks.

Timing is vital in creating a successful relationship. It can make or break a good thing.

I'm bad at timing.

Me to I have never timed things just right for them to goes as planned I try to text her as little as I can I wait about two

or three weeks an out of know where she sends me a text wanting to talk so I am in a way making her chase after me to so far its working

I feel it's important to tell your partner as soon as you're comfortable with them. If you put on a facade or persona and you aren't yourself, after a short period of time, your true self will start to show. The whole idea of a diagnosis is to give people a better understand of why someone is how they are, if your partner refuses to take the time to understand or simply generalizes you, they aren't worth your time.

A relationship free from expectations and pressures is the best kind. I also feel it's important to tell them sharply and not talk in a self-obsessive manner about it and the worst thing you can possibly ever do is talk about yourself or AS in a self-defeatist manner.

Dunno, with me they know what they're getting into as I'm so open about it. I'll weed them out early.

Thats what I have been doing I completely agree with you about everything you said best advice I have read in a while on WP

I have been with the same man for 13 years and he still doesnt really get, nor do I think believe that I am aspie. I think he thinks I am just using it as an excuse to try to get away with behavior he finds difficult to live with. This i funny however as he completely excepts my son and his autism, but I guess because its not as obvious with me that I am on the spectrum he just doesnt understand it or completely believe it.

Wolfheart is hot

one of the girls i dated always argued that i was the most normal person she had ever met
and that "the doctors were wrong" as she would say

another girl thought it was cool and interesting

and one girl actualy asked me if i had it based on what she had observed

i usualy tell people in person and usualy with then meeting them the second time(never on a date)
but i always seem to get a different response

I haven't gotten much of a response at this point. He said he'd heard of it bit didn't know what Aspergers was. I showed him a link that explained and all he said was "Oh, I get it".

I'm trying to figure this out too. I'm very open about my diagnosis, so for me it's not a matter of someone "knowing" or not "knowing". What I wonder about is how much or how little understanding is okay or a sign to move on.

I ended a 22 marriage to my husband when he told me my diagnosis was bull sh** and he refused to read about it or talk about it--because that complete lack of understanding and unwillingness to accept some basic, medical truths about me and my neurology just wasn't okay.

Guess I'm having difficulty with the gray area. What I see here is most people saying they've talked to dating partners about it, eventually, but that the response is...confusing. Is "okay, I get it" really enough? Or is it a huge bit of support? I guess only time reveals that as the relationship moves on and you are either understood or made to suffer because of your differences--and it's hard to see which is which unless someone's so callous they tell you outright that it's bunk.