Fake nice guys!

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When people say girls don't to go for nice guys...... Do you agree with me it's the 'fake nice' guys that women dislike because can see right through them?

That's why I always it's best to be your genuine self esspecially when it comes to females. I think overall women perhaps are better judges of character.

I think it's best to "put your best foot forward" while revealing your "true self." Be a proper gentleman.

To be a "Nice Guy" (trademark) is to not be appealing to women.

I definitely agree woth you here. I am certainly more attracted to genuinely nice guys rather then not very nice people

Better to be not nice but 'genuine' than nice but fake



Some girls might view phony nice guys as rapists

It's better to be nice, yet genuine than nasty, yet genuine.

That is unless you want a relationship based on nastiness.

But sometimes being nice is just not in my nature

Well, then. You'll have to suffer whatever consequences befall you should you be nasty.

I mean...you don't to be utterly nice---but at least you could be decent.

There is a difference between just being not nice (like just being at like 0 niceness) and being nasty (minus niceness). Bwing nasty is the unattractive one.

No one expects you to be happy and nice all the time. Sometimes your going to be grumpy, sometimes your gunna be fed up with people. As long as you are fundamentally a nice person to be around there is not problem

I was nice to women because I cared about them as friends & I didn't like them romantically till we were friends a while. 1ce I liked them romantically, it became harder for me to support them when they used me to complain to about guys they were with or liked who were bad for & to them. No women ever liked me romantically back except for my 1st girlfriend who I was friends with online.

The guys that complain that women don't like "nice guys", more often than not, aren't very nice themselves.

If a person starts making that complaint, run. Just run.

ughhh yes.

like this guy the other day...he kept saying that he was just being friendly but he was also calling me things like "beautiful" and "sexy" and "cute" despite me being very clear that i'm not okay with it. after reiterating myself for the fifth time, he said "well it's true" but also that he was sorry and respected that because he's "a nice guy", and again, he's just "being friendly".

i don't think an actual nice guy would be so disrespectful as to ignore my request five times, or believe that "complimenting" me on my looks is friendly. also, he tried to make me feel bad (read: manipulate me) about not going to his house party and hanging out with him and all the people there who i've never even met. in addition to flatly rejecting his invitation, i also told him that i was on painkillers from a recent wisdom tooth extraction and was not in any condition to "hang out", to which he responded, "that's the best time to hang out". ugh.

and when i don't respond to him he gets sh***y like, "what, you not gonna talk to me?" like somehow he can't see how ridiculous he's acting and actually thinks he's being nice???

Different men different choices. So not all men like nice people rather than nice guy.

I think it's more a case of the so-called 'nice guys' having no other title to hinge upon, so they categorise themselves as nice (even if they're not actually nice). As a result, the term has kinda become synonymous with boring guys who don't really have much to offer.

I think most women of course want to be treated respectfully by their man, but I don't think they want to be worshipped, like these supposed nice guys seem to think.

WP's Nice Guys threads count: 1000001.

You ruined it, OP.

Most things in life are achieved through hard work and effort.

Nice guys illogically mistake romantic relationships as working this way as well, when love and dating is actually completely and totally random! (and not in a good way).

They falsely believe you get out what you put in, you reap what you sow, etc.

They believe putting in the effort should see results.

They are simply frustrated when they don't see the results they were aiming for.

Some nice guys are manipulative ar55høles, but some are genuinely trying to be a 'nice guy' and trying their best but feel frustrated they aren't finding success when it seems plenty of men who are a55høles are.

I definitely believe this to be true.

Unfortunately, dating seems so random that effort means nothing.

You can improve yourself and this may help your chances slighly, but there are no guarantees.

There's plenty of kind, hardworking, social, friendly, confident, smart, fit, healthy people who are chronically single and never had a relationship, there's plenty of rude, selfish, greedy, unconfident/low-self-esteem, out-of-shape, uninteresting people who find successful relationship after successful relationship.

Nice guys identify with the label as they believe effort should bring reward, and so by associating themselves with a good person, they believe a good person is more likely than a bad person to find dating success, when this is not actually true at all whatsoever in any possible way at all, and never is, was or ever will be.

All of this lack of dating success and frustration with the realization their entire purpose to self-improve has been worthless and wrong, will make them feel a very strong Cognitive Dissonance. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cognitive_dissonance

So, consistently observing 'bad' people find much relationship success while they, a 'good' person remains alone, makes them angry that being a 'good' person doesn't work.

They start to think women do like a55høles for this very reason, which I believe has some truth to it, specifically a55høle women can like a55høle men.

Also, by constantly being told by society just how awful, boring, unattractive, rude, aggressive, manipulative, etc. they are, they eventually become the very thing they didn't like being called.

This happened to me in a similar way. I was a good kid bullied in 1st-3rd grade by both teachers and students, so all that built up hate and aggression meant I turned into the bully in 4th grade.

And it was only made worse and further ignited when people decide I was 'just an a55høle all along' when I only became this was slowly overtime.

This is what 'nice guys' tend to be.

Anyway, I am not a 'nice guy' myself, I'm an anti-hero at best and neutral, I've always identified as the exact middle of the 'good vs. evil' spectrum, but I may be mistaken as one even if I'm just being genuinely 'nice'.

I defend them simply because, to an extent, I can understand these strange creatures, but otherwise a lot of their train of thought has me confused, like why they'd naively think for a second effort in dating = reward in dating.

At best they are misguided everymen, at worst, possible creep who wants to drunk r*pe her in disguise. But that's a big gap.

I remember reading one of those "nice guys" complaints in the newspaper, written by some teenager who was working hard on getting laid.

He got a great answer back from a self-styled "as*hole", who told him "Women are not vending machines where you put in nice acts and sex falls out." What a great answer, and pretty much what Outrider has observed. Women can smell it a mile off.

Guys need to find someone who matches them, not try to get a woman to give them gratitude sex - that's treating her like a prostitute.