how many is too many?

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How many previous partners do you think someone can have, before you would consider her "trashy", or "used goods", etc.?

Honest answers only, please. I promise I won't judge anyone harshly for what they say in this thread.

It's not that I'd consider her trashy, but how could I possibly have any security in a relationship with somebody who's had numerous partners? What makes me different from any other boyfriend?

As for the specific number... I dunno. I've never been in the situation where I'd have to consider that.

there is no answer. it's all about the person. it's no one's position to judge you. you are who you are and if you like sex, who is to judge that. we are all individuals and it is good to be ourselves and if some one is compatible with that, well, that is awesome. otherwise have no worries

I second what ovpt said. I don't set a threshold for how many sexual partners a woman can have had before me. Objectively, more past sexual partners means more experience, which is more a good thing than a bad thing as far as I'm concerned. But then, it also means a higher probability of her carrying an STD. Either way, I don't slut-shame.

If more than the 1/4 of her age, then it's kinda too much. So a 30 yo, 7 max.

Not trashy but what Sabre said.

"too many" is when you cannot do anything without having your partner point out similarities s/he sees between you and a previous partner. if only everyone knew, how much of a turnoff that really is.

i think a distinction can be made here between "sexual" partners that are not usually commitments, and "romantic", long term partners which are.

for the former, there is less on the downside of lots of experience...IMO.

Too many got a point here because it refer to mental health wellness. Rebound relationships and consistent casual relationships is forgetting about yourself as oneself of being happy and finding out about who you are. Psychologists always advocate young women about worrying their welfare. It reduces your happiness because being single would mean they are unhappy themselves as being single.

So, non-judgmental way to answer here is you have to think about yourself before occupying numbers.

The thing is for me previous experienced became abhorrent after meeting my partner so it didn't matter. I had experience he was a virgin and it has never been an issue.

Including my fiance I have slept with 6 people (more then Boos number ) but I am very far from trashy. I'm well spoken educated and (despite what ecomatt would suggest) of sound mental health. I just enjoy sex (but it's 10 times better with someone you love)

If anything I wish my partner had been wih someone else so I know that he has somone to compare to and choose me anyway (he had previous experience in other things).

Also mine were not relationships but casual events. My friend has at least 20 under her belt and is extremely popular with guys (I have no idea how she does it). She is sweet, wholesome and petite. I bet none of these guys would say no to her lol

Their is no such thing as too many it is relative to each person. What matters is that someone not do something deceitful say cheat on someone.

As I myself am not very promiscuous, I would not feel compatible with someone who is. In the same way I would not want to date a smoker, or a religious person. It highlights a difference in mindset. This is not to say having a lot of casual sex makes you a bad person, but it's something I wouldn't be comfortable with in a long term partner. And something I will make several judgements about.

Most men I know feel the same way.

I still think cheating is one of the worst things to do to a person.

I get what your saying but in my case it was 5 different once. As in I had only had sex 5 times before meeting my fiance. That's not as much as some one who has had a f**k buddy (especially if that buddy sleeps around to). I don't think you can get a real idea of promiscuity just by previous partner numbers.

I don't agree at all. Having LTR or "f**k buddies" still shows greater potential ability to commit to a single partner. Having many different sex partners will make me think the person needs validation from alot of people, rather than one, which is why number of partners is a much better indicator than amount of sex had.

And honestly, in my own experience, it shows most of the time. In the same way a male virgin can't fake being a stud, a very promiscuous woman can't fake being reserved.

Additionally, higher number means more previous encounters being drawn in comparison.

It doesn't thought that's the thing. I have never compared anyone I have slept with aside from the fact I enjoy it more eith my fiance because I love him.

Also I'm actually pretty reserved irl and in a long term relationship so how is that possible in your opinion?

Well, saying you enjoy it more with him is already a comparison.

None of my statements were directed at you, I wouldn't have a problem with your body count and I wouldn't classify you as highly promiscuous. I also never said it wasn't possible for a woman to commit if she's had previous partners, or that all women should be virgins. I was just trying to explain why I think there are some valid and reasonable concerns a man can have, if he senses that a woman has been with alot of guys. If a met women at my age, and let's say she's had 50 partners, it would be intellectually ridiculous to say that doesn't say anything about her at all, and that I'm not allowed to have any concerns about being in a relationship with her.

What I ment was that sexuality is VERY transparent. A male virgin can't fake the confidence of a stud, and a promiscuous woman can't fake the innocence of a virgin.