Don't put women on a pedestal

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This might sound like humble bragging, bear with me.

I can't stand it when men treat me like they're being gentlemanly and showing me extra respect as a woman.

We are not all temptresses. We are people too!

It's not respectful. It's treating women like "the other."

I got uninvited from something because it turned out only me and him were going. Fine. I'll go by myself. I don't need you.

Aparently this is a friend. Apparently he's just shy. Apparently he's just bring "respectful". I'm not going to eat him! My hair isn't made of snakes. I'm not going to turn him to stone.

If you are a shy chap who is a little scared of being alone with a woman. Don't pretend like you're being chivalrous. You're not going to be expected to be anything special other than just being yourself. Just go along to the concert or whatever and enjoy it like you would with a male friend. Even if you really fancy this girl. You won't win her over by avoiding spending time with her.


If we say yes, we want to spend time with you. If you're scared she thinks it's a date and she was ok with it being a date anyway, you've lost out.

Rant over.

I’ve never put a woman on a pedestal.

Are the Medusa’s leg hairs tiny snakes too?

I agree that shyness and effeminacy in men masquerading as chivalry is pathetic and unattractive, but I still lament the death of REAL, manly chivalry.

I find effeminacy kinda cute actually.

There's a difference between being cute and chickening out.

Thanks for sharing. The thing that I dont get - why did you go on a date without having a crush on that guy?

Que? I like him. I do have crush on him.

Ooh, I don't think shy NDs should ask or go on dates with women. They are supposed to observe them from a distance only until they feel safe with closer contact.

And watch as the women give up and walk away

I don't think so. You liked him a bit and that's all. Instead of being happy to be with him you are unhappy that he doesn't wants you to think bad of him. But this kind of dating isn't the way that love is. And I think you were dishonest towards yourself from the beginning. You didn't feel really attracted and in the end even disgusted because of the way that he is. Don't get me wrong that is totally OK. Drop him!

No. I liked him. He doesn't want to spend time with me. What's wrong with your reading comprehension? He said no were not going out not me.

I'm angry because I thought he liked me, but he was too scared to spend time alone with me out of some false sense of gentlemanliess.

I went to the concert by myself because he would go with me.

Last edited by hurtloam on 16 Dec 2018, 11:09 am, edited 1 time in total.

Some women deserve to be figuratively put on pedestals.

And certainly very few women deserve to be figuratively dropped into the gutter.

My wife has dealt with as much hardship as I (maybe more), and is still a beautiful person.

Are you sure he doesn't want to spend time with you - are you sure he was too scared of you? How is your mind-reading score?

We autistics often have some very distorted perceptions, and the best thing we can do is recognize that and challenge our judgments to see if they are accurate and logical.


Good for you! I've gone to events alone when I didn't have a companion. It's not as good as going with someone, but it's still good.

Sounds a bit to strange to me. He would be happy to spend time with you if he had really a crush on you. I would guess that he has an other girlfriend or a crush on someone else. Or he is afraid to be judged by others once they see him with you. Drop him!

Sigh.

Another one bites the dust.

Why does no one ever like me?

I should just give up.

Bea. We're not all ret*d on here. You can tell by someone's body language whether they've got a crush in you. Them blushing when you talk to them is a big sign for example.

Texting right back when you send them a message is another example. Also other things you pick up on in person.