What do you think are some major causes of Aspie rejection?
RICKY5 wrote:
Erisad wrote:
Um...did you forget to add some text there? What do you have a problem with the fact that I'm a virgin? Do all women have to be sluts?
Ja Ja Mein GrammarFuhrer!
Kinda reminds me of those overpaid american autoworkers who wonder why nobody wants to buy their crappy cars...
I wasn't criticizing your grammar but whatever. I can see that you're only trying to piss me off now. D:
foreveryoung - How can I be the "girl of his dreams" if I'm not attractive? Unless he has low expectations. I can understand him, I can be upbeat when I'm not being harassed about my beliefs. Why do I have to be a slut? Why can't I choose whether or not to keep my virginity? Men aren't entitled to sex and thinking so is ridiculous. I doubt either of you will actually pay attention to what I'm saying. After all, I'm just a girl. What do I know? :/
nick007 wrote:
foreveryoung wrote:
I'm convinced both you and Toad would have a partner if you dropped the whole "I'm unlovable" thing. People don't want people with rock-bottom self-esteem. That's why you only get guys that want you for sex. If you were more friendly and upbeat, you'd meet a guy that would think "She's not the greatest looking girl in the world, but she has a kick-a$$ personality.
Not necessarily. I have self-esteem problems & I like people who also have self-esteem issues cuz I can relate to em. People like Toad, Erisad & me have self-esteem problems because we are constantly rejected. Maybe if we found people who accepted us when we wer having a bad day; we'd start to feel better about things. The poor self-esteem is caused by the rejection. Even when I was happy & optimistic about things; I still got rejected.
Actually, the rejection is caused by your low self esteem, not the other way around. People don't think to themselves "he's Asperger's and we're NT, I'm going to maliciously reject him". People usually don't want to be friends with someone who is hanging their head in self pity, aka self consciousness. You have to make a genuine effort to have upkeep of both your looks and personality, and even if you are a little off, if you do this it will lead to you having more friends and then a bf or gf. I know this because I am a living example, it took me a couple years but I found it is all about your attitude, no matter how cliché that may sound.
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foreveryoung wrote:
Usually I don't agree with Ricky, but he has a point...as a not-so-attractive girl that refuses to put out and has a negative attitude and low self-esteem, you aren't doing yourself any favors. The way you could win a guy's heart is to be the girl of his dreams...i.e. understand him, be upbeat, give him all the sex he wants and so on. This isn't necessarily what I want, but unfortunately it's what the majorty of men want. The whole, I'm a depressed, misunderstood, unattractive virgin thing isn't going to help you in your quest for a boyfriend.
Why should a guy treat a girl like a princess when she acts like a toad?
RICKY5 wrote:
foreveryoung wrote:
Usually I don't agree with Ricky, but he has a point...as a not-so-attractive girl that refuses to put out and has a negative attitude and low self-esteem, you aren't doing yourself any favors. The way you could win a guy's heart is to be the girl of his dreams...i.e. understand him, be upbeat, give him all the sex he wants and so on. This isn't necessarily what I want, but unfortunately it's what the majorty of men want. The whole, I'm a depressed, misunderstood, unattractive virgin thing isn't going to help you in your quest for a boyfriend.
Why should a guy treat a girl like a princess when she acts like a toad?
I'm only acting this way because I was provoked. If you weren't so hell-bent on telling me that I have to be irresponsible with my vagina in order to find love, I wouldn't have had to lash out at you. I can be a really nice person, so long as I am treated with respect, which you haven't done. :/
Erisad wrote:
RICKY5 wrote:
Erisad wrote:
Um...did you forget to add some text there? What do you have a problem with the fact that I'm a virgin? Do all women have to be sluts?
Ja Ja Mein GrammarFuhrer!
Kinda reminds me of those overpaid american autoworkers who wonder why nobody wants to buy their crappy cars...
I wasn't criticizing your grammar but whatever. I can see that you're only trying to piss me off now. D:
foreveryoung - How can I be the "girl of his dreams" if I'm not attractive? Unless he has low expectations. I can understand him, I can be upbeat when I'm not being harassed about my beliefs. Why do I have to be a slut? Why can't I choose whether or not to keep my virginity? Men aren't entitled to sex and thinking so is ridiculous. I doubt either of you will actually pay attention to what I'm saying. After all, I'm just a girl. What do I know? :/
Your really starting to get annoying. If you want a man, you need to get rid of your "I'm fat, depressed, unlovable" persona and get a more upbeat, enjoyable personality. All you do is b***h and whine and I can see why your single. You need to change your personality, and only you can do that. But I think your destined to be another Toad here on wrongplanet and will find more comfort in bitching about your life instead of actually doing something to change it.
Erisad wrote:
RICKY5 wrote:
Erisad wrote:
Yeah but that's one way to wear out all the traction in my vaj by the first anniversary. Besides, I'm a virgin. I have to wait until a man proves himself before giving it up. If he can't take that then he can f**k off. I'm not a whore and I don't intend to be one. Despite what you may think, women are more than just baby-makers. D:
Apparently they are awesome comedians as well...
Some of them are, yes but that wasn't really the point I was getting at. Yes I get that you were trying to make a mockery of my views of gender equality. D:
Marxist feminism makes as much sense as flying a plane into a skyscraper so you can bang 72 virgins paid for by a magic rock in durkadurkaland.
Sionis wrote:
Erisad wrote:
RICKY5 wrote:
Erisad wrote:
Um...did you forget to add some text there? What do you have a problem with the fact that I'm a virgin? Do all women have to be sluts?
Ja Ja Mein GrammarFuhrer!
Kinda reminds me of those overpaid american autoworkers who wonder why nobody wants to buy their crappy cars...
I wasn't criticizing your grammar but whatever. I can see that you're only trying to piss me off now. D:
foreveryoung - How can I be the "girl of his dreams" if I'm not attractive? Unless he has low expectations. I can understand him, I can be upbeat when I'm not being harassed about my beliefs. Why do I have to be a slut? Why can't I choose whether or not to keep my virginity? Men aren't entitled to sex and thinking so is ridiculous. I doubt either of you will actually pay attention to what I'm saying. After all, I'm just a girl. What do I know? :/
Your really starting to get annoying. If you want a man, you need to get rid of your "I'm fat, depressed, unlovable" persona and get a more upbeat, enjoyable personality. All you do is b***h and whine and I can see why your single. You need to change your personality, and only you can do that. But I think your destined to be another Toad here on wrongplanet and will find more comfort in bitching about your life instead of actually doing something to change it.
Wow your the only toad here, why don't your pick on me instead
nick007
Veteran
Joined: 4 May 2010
Gender: Male
Posts: 27,643
Location: was Louisiana but now Vermont in capitalistic military dictatorship called USA
foreveryoung wrote:
Usually I don't agree with Ricky, but he has a point...as a not-so-attractive girl that refuses to put out and has a negative attitude and low self-esteem, you aren't doing yourself any favors. The way you could win a guy's heart is to be the girl of his dreams...i.e. understand him, be upbeat, give him all the sex he wants and so on. This isn't necessarily what I want, but unfortunately it's what the majorty of men want. The whole, I'm a depressed, misunderstood, unattractive virgin thing isn't going to help you in your quest for a boyfriend.
It would help if she was willing to be with a depressed misunderstood unattractive guy. There's lots of guys out there like that would love to find a girl they can relate to. I think people should try to find others like them.
FerrariMike_40 wrote:
nick007 wrote:
foreveryoung wrote:
I'm convinced both you and Toad would have a partner if you dropped the whole "I'm unlovable" thing. People don't want people with rock-bottom self-esteem. That's why you only get guys that want you for sex. If you were more friendly and upbeat, you'd meet a guy that would think "She's not the greatest looking girl in the world, but she has a kick-a$$ personality.
Not necessarily. I have self-esteem problems & I like people who also have self-esteem issues cuz I can relate to em. People like Toad, Erisad & me have self-esteem problems because we are constantly rejected. Maybe if we found people who accepted us when we wer having a bad day; we'd start to feel better about things. The poor self-esteem is caused by the rejection. Even when I was happy & optimistic about things; I still got rejected.
Actually, the rejection is caused by your low self esteem, not the other way around. People don't think to themselves "he's Asperger's and we're NT, I'm going to maliciously reject him". People usually don't want to be friends with someone who is hanging their head in self pity, aka self consciousness. You have to make a genuine effort to have upkeep of both your looks and personality, and even if you are a little off, if you do this it will lead to you having more friends and then a bf or gf. I know this because I am a living example, it took me a couple years but I found it is all about your attitude, no matter how cliché that may sound.
I think the rejection is caused because I have disabilities besides AS. People misjudge me before they even know me. It's also because of social norms. Guys are expected to be masculine & to be providers in a relationship.
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Friskeygirl wrote:
Sionis wrote:
Erisad wrote:
RICKY5 wrote:
Erisad wrote:
Um...did you forget to add some text there? What do you have a problem with the fact that I'm a virgin? Do all women have to be sluts?
Ja Ja Mein GrammarFuhrer!
Kinda reminds me of those overpaid american autoworkers who wonder why nobody wants to buy their crappy cars...
I wasn't criticizing your grammar but whatever. I can see that you're only trying to piss me off now. D:
foreveryoung - How can I be the "girl of his dreams" if I'm not attractive? Unless he has low expectations. I can understand him, I can be upbeat when I'm not being harassed about my beliefs. Why do I have to be a slut? Why can't I choose whether or not to keep my virginity? Men aren't entitled to sex and thinking so is ridiculous. I doubt either of you will actually pay attention to what I'm saying. After all, I'm just a girl. What do I know? :/
Your really starting to get annoying. If you want a man, you need to get rid of your "I'm fat, depressed, unlovable" persona and get a more upbeat, enjoyable personality. All you do is b***h and whine and I can see why your single. You need to change your personality, and only you can do that. But I think your destined to be another Toad here on wrongplanet and will find more comfort in bitching about your life instead of actually doing something to change it.
Wow your the only toad here, why don't your pick on me instead
Why would I pick on you; I have no qualms with you Friskeygirl. Why not pick on Ricky5? And when I said Toad, I meant another ToadofSteel; Erisad is the female version of him.
Last edited by Sionis on 18 Aug 2010, 11:14 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Erisad wrote:
RICKY5 wrote:
Erisad wrote:
RICKY5 wrote:
It means coc... I mean cognitive behavioral therapy.
Chubby girls can be quite fun. I've had a few chubby escorts and I gotta say they work their ass off to show you a good time!
Obviously avoiding crap food (like anything with "glucose syrup" known as "high-fructose corn syrup" in the USA) can mitigate your perceived weight issue.
Like I said before, you just have to bring something that other girls don't offer to the table. If you know how to give an awesome massage, it will take you very far as well.
I routinely see guys that I would rate about a 8-9 out of 10 in the looks department with girls that I would rate at a 5 or so on the looks department. The reason those guys have chosen girls who are seen as below their league is because they are being offered something that the conventionally prettier girls do not offer.
Sex and "love" is a marketplace. Offer something the competition does not.
Chubby girls can be quite fun. I've had a few chubby escorts and I gotta say they work their ass off to show you a good time!
Obviously avoiding crap food (like anything with "glucose syrup" known as "high-fructose corn syrup" in the USA) can mitigate your perceived weight issue.
Like I said before, you just have to bring something that other girls don't offer to the table. If you know how to give an awesome massage, it will take you very far as well.
I routinely see guys that I would rate about a 8-9 out of 10 in the looks department with girls that I would rate at a 5 or so on the looks department. The reason those guys have chosen girls who are seen as below their league is because they are being offered something that the conventionally prettier girls do not offer.
Sex and "love" is a marketplace. Offer something the competition does not.
No therapy! Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiissssssssssssssssssssss.
I have been eating better and exercising, which has been helping. I just wish it would work faster. D:
That's the thing. I don't know if I have anything to offer, which is probably why I'm always lonely. People say that I'm funny but that probably doesn't do me any good.
If you can make a guy feel good almost every night without fail, you will have a VERY happy man. You'd be amazed at the number of guys who work their ass off for someone who doesn't appreciate anything they do and barely touches them.
Every night? Holy sh**. What if I have something else to do? Like have a job? I'm sorry but being a girlfriend doesn't mean I have to be his private whore that he can solicit sex from whenever he wants. Look, I don't know what you expect from me but I don't think I can do that. I feel sex should be spontaneous, not a "it's 8 o' clock, on your knees b***h!" There's no passion there.
you GO girl!! !! so proud of you for saying this!! !!
_________________
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viewtopic.php?t=391105
hyperlexian wrote:
Erisad wrote:
RICKY5 wrote:
Erisad wrote:
RICKY5 wrote:
It means coc... I mean cognitive behavioral therapy.
Chubby girls can be quite fun. I've had a few chubby escorts and I gotta say they work their ass off to show you a good time!
Obviously avoiding crap food (like anything with "glucose syrup" known as "high-fructose corn syrup" in the USA) can mitigate your perceived weight issue.
Like I said before, you just have to bring something that other girls don't offer to the table. If you know how to give an awesome massage, it will take you very far as well.
I routinely see guys that I would rate about a 8-9 out of 10 in the looks department with girls that I would rate at a 5 or so on the looks department. The reason those guys have chosen girls who are seen as below their league is because they are being offered something that the conventionally prettier girls do not offer.
Sex and "love" is a marketplace. Offer something the competition does not.
Chubby girls can be quite fun. I've had a few chubby escorts and I gotta say they work their ass off to show you a good time!
Obviously avoiding crap food (like anything with "glucose syrup" known as "high-fructose corn syrup" in the USA) can mitigate your perceived weight issue.
Like I said before, you just have to bring something that other girls don't offer to the table. If you know how to give an awesome massage, it will take you very far as well.
I routinely see guys that I would rate about a 8-9 out of 10 in the looks department with girls that I would rate at a 5 or so on the looks department. The reason those guys have chosen girls who are seen as below their league is because they are being offered something that the conventionally prettier girls do not offer.
Sex and "love" is a marketplace. Offer something the competition does not.
No therapy! Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiissssssssssssssssssssss.
I have been eating better and exercising, which has been helping. I just wish it would work faster. D:
That's the thing. I don't know if I have anything to offer, which is probably why I'm always lonely. People say that I'm funny but that probably doesn't do me any good.
If you can make a guy feel good almost every night without fail, you will have a VERY happy man. You'd be amazed at the number of guys who work their ass off for someone who doesn't appreciate anything they do and barely touches them.
Every night? Holy sh**. What if I have something else to do? Like have a job? I'm sorry but being a girlfriend doesn't mean I have to be his private whore that he can solicit sex from whenever he wants. Look, I don't know what you expect from me but I don't think I can do that. I feel sex should be spontaneous, not a "it's 8 o' clock, on your knees b***h!" There's no passion there.
you GO girl!! !! so proud of you for saying this!! !!
You GO girl! With that craptacular attitude, you will make a fine cat-lady!
RICKY5 wrote:
hyperlexian wrote:
Erisad wrote:
RICKY5 wrote:
Erisad wrote:
RICKY5 wrote:
It means coc... I mean cognitive behavioral therapy.
Chubby girls can be quite fun. I've had a few chubby escorts and I gotta say they work their ass off to show you a good time!
Obviously avoiding crap food (like anything with "glucose syrup" known as "high-fructose corn syrup" in the USA) can mitigate your perceived weight issue.
Like I said before, you just have to bring something that other girls don't offer to the table. If you know how to give an awesome massage, it will take you very far as well.
I routinely see guys that I would rate about a 8-9 out of 10 in the looks department with girls that I would rate at a 5 or so on the looks department. The reason those guys have chosen girls who are seen as below their league is because they are being offered something that the conventionally prettier girls do not offer.
Sex and "love" is a marketplace. Offer something the competition does not.
Chubby girls can be quite fun. I've had a few chubby escorts and I gotta say they work their ass off to show you a good time!
Obviously avoiding crap food (like anything with "glucose syrup" known as "high-fructose corn syrup" in the USA) can mitigate your perceived weight issue.
Like I said before, you just have to bring something that other girls don't offer to the table. If you know how to give an awesome massage, it will take you very far as well.
I routinely see guys that I would rate about a 8-9 out of 10 in the looks department with girls that I would rate at a 5 or so on the looks department. The reason those guys have chosen girls who are seen as below their league is because they are being offered something that the conventionally prettier girls do not offer.
Sex and "love" is a marketplace. Offer something the competition does not.
No therapy! Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiissssssssssssssssssssss.
I have been eating better and exercising, which has been helping. I just wish it would work faster. D:
That's the thing. I don't know if I have anything to offer, which is probably why I'm always lonely. People say that I'm funny but that probably doesn't do me any good.
If you can make a guy feel good almost every night without fail, you will have a VERY happy man. You'd be amazed at the number of guys who work their ass off for someone who doesn't appreciate anything they do and barely touches them.
Every night? Holy sh**. What if I have something else to do? Like have a job? I'm sorry but being a girlfriend doesn't mean I have to be his private whore that he can solicit sex from whenever he wants. Look, I don't know what you expect from me but I don't think I can do that. I feel sex should be spontaneous, not a "it's 8 o' clock, on your knees b***h!" There's no passion there.
you GO girl!! !! so proud of you for saying this!! !!
You GO girl! With that craptacular attitude, you will make a fine cat-lady!
HA
HA
HA!! !!
really? i've been happily MARRIED for 16 years, and i had no shortage of male attention before i got married (and have to turn guys down occasionally still), so you can go adopt some lonely cats yourself, boy.
_________________
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viewtopic.php?t=391105
hyperlexian wrote:
RICKY5 wrote:
hyperlexian wrote:
Erisad wrote:
RICKY5 wrote:
Erisad wrote:
RICKY5 wrote:
It means coc... I mean cognitive behavioral therapy.
Chubby girls can be quite fun. I've had a few chubby escorts and I gotta say they work their ass off to show you a good time!
Obviously avoiding crap food (like anything with "glucose syrup" known as "high-fructose corn syrup" in the USA) can mitigate your perceived weight issue.
Like I said before, you just have to bring something that other girls don't offer to the table. If you know how to give an awesome massage, it will take you very far as well.
I routinely see guys that I would rate about a 8-9 out of 10 in the looks department with girls that I would rate at a 5 or so on the looks department. The reason those guys have chosen girls who are seen as below their league is because they are being offered something that the conventionally prettier girls do not offer.
Sex and "love" is a marketplace. Offer something the competition does not.
Chubby girls can be quite fun. I've had a few chubby escorts and I gotta say they work their ass off to show you a good time!
Obviously avoiding crap food (like anything with "glucose syrup" known as "high-fructose corn syrup" in the USA) can mitigate your perceived weight issue.
Like I said before, you just have to bring something that other girls don't offer to the table. If you know how to give an awesome massage, it will take you very far as well.
I routinely see guys that I would rate about a 8-9 out of 10 in the looks department with girls that I would rate at a 5 or so on the looks department. The reason those guys have chosen girls who are seen as below their league is because they are being offered something that the conventionally prettier girls do not offer.
Sex and "love" is a marketplace. Offer something the competition does not.
No therapy! Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiissssssssssssssssssssss.
I have been eating better and exercising, which has been helping. I just wish it would work faster. D:
That's the thing. I don't know if I have anything to offer, which is probably why I'm always lonely. People say that I'm funny but that probably doesn't do me any good.
If you can make a guy feel good almost every night without fail, you will have a VERY happy man. You'd be amazed at the number of guys who work their ass off for someone who doesn't appreciate anything they do and barely touches them.
Every night? Holy sh**. What if I have something else to do? Like have a job? I'm sorry but being a girlfriend doesn't mean I have to be his private whore that he can solicit sex from whenever he wants. Look, I don't know what you expect from me but I don't think I can do that. I feel sex should be spontaneous, not a "it's 8 o' clock, on your knees b***h!" There's no passion there.
you GO girl!! !! so proud of you for saying this!! !!
You GO girl! With that craptacular attitude, you will make a fine cat-lady!
HA
HA
HA!! !!
really? i've been happily MARRIED for 16 years, and i had no shortage of male attention before i got married (and have to turn guys down occasionally still), so you can go adopt some lonely cats yourself, [b]boy.
Callin' me "boy". Very redneck southern sheriff. I like it.
Ya sho is right! So I guess Iz be adoppin' dem cats massuh!
techstepgenr8tion
Veteran
Joined: 6 Feb 2005
Age: 45
Gender: Male
Posts: 24,511
Location: 28th Path of Tzaddi
techstepgenr8tion wrote:
Wow, if I knew the blowtorches were out I would have brought my creme brulee.
Not to be the mafioso in the corner palming a baseball bat but... seeing the current drama here roll back a notch would be great .
Not to be the mafioso in the corner palming a baseball bat but... seeing the current drama here roll back a notch would be great .
Yeah. That's why I went to bed last night, I knew this discussion wasn't going anywhere and it turned into a flame war. I was just having an off day. I'm usually quite happy in real life when I'm around my friends back at school. I'm not when I'm at home because there's lots of tension there and it transfers onto my posts. I would hope a forum of aspies would be a bit more tolerant of one another. So I don't want to be a whore, that shouldn't be a problem. It's my body and I can choose to do with it as I want. I'll just have to find other ways to keep him happy. :/
RICKY5 wrote:
hyperlexian wrote:
RICKY5 wrote:
hyperlexian wrote:
Erisad wrote:
RICKY5 wrote:
Erisad wrote:
RICKY5 wrote:
It means coc... I mean cognitive behavioral therapy.
Chubby girls can be quite fun. I've had a few chubby escorts and I gotta say they work their ass off to show you a good time!
Obviously avoiding crap food (like anything with "glucose syrup" known as "high-fructose corn syrup" in the USA) can mitigate your perceived weight issue.
Like I said before, you just have to bring something that other girls don't offer to the table. If you know how to give an awesome massage, it will take you very far as well.
I routinely see guys that I would rate about a 8-9 out of 10 in the looks department with girls that I would rate at a 5 or so on the looks department. The reason those guys have chosen girls who are seen as below their league is because they are being offered something that the conventionally prettier girls do not offer.
Sex and "love" is a marketplace. Offer something the competition does not.
Chubby girls can be quite fun. I've had a few chubby escorts and I gotta say they work their ass off to show you a good time!
Obviously avoiding crap food (like anything with "glucose syrup" known as "high-fructose corn syrup" in the USA) can mitigate your perceived weight issue.
Like I said before, you just have to bring something that other girls don't offer to the table. If you know how to give an awesome massage, it will take you very far as well.
I routinely see guys that I would rate about a 8-9 out of 10 in the looks department with girls that I would rate at a 5 or so on the looks department. The reason those guys have chosen girls who are seen as below their league is because they are being offered something that the conventionally prettier girls do not offer.
Sex and "love" is a marketplace. Offer something the competition does not.
No therapy! Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiissssssssssssssssssssss.
I have been eating better and exercising, which has been helping. I just wish it would work faster. D:
That's the thing. I don't know if I have anything to offer, which is probably why I'm always lonely. People say that I'm funny but that probably doesn't do me any good.
If you can make a guy feel good almost every night without fail, you will have a VERY happy man. You'd be amazed at the number of guys who work their ass off for someone who doesn't appreciate anything they do and barely touches them.
Every night? Holy sh**. What if I have something else to do? Like have a job? I'm sorry but being a girlfriend doesn't mean I have to be his private whore that he can solicit sex from whenever he wants. Look, I don't know what you expect from me but I don't think I can do that. I feel sex should be spontaneous, not a "it's 8 o' clock, on your knees b***h!" There's no passion there.
you GO girl!! !! so proud of you for saying this!! !!
You GO girl! With that craptacular attitude, you will make a fine cat-lady!
HA
HA
HA!! !!
really? i've been happily MARRIED for 16 years, and i had no shortage of male attention before i got married (and have to turn guys down occasionally still), so you can go adopt some lonely cats yourself, [b]boy.
Callin' me "boy". Very redneck southern sheriff. I like it.
Ya sho is right! So I guess Iz be adoppin' dem cats massuh!
interesting. in canada we use 'boy' to denote a male who is too immature to be called a man. it's not at all rednecky here. cultural difference i guess.
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