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What to expect?

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Volodja
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13 Jan 2011, 12:39 pm

Jamesy wrote:
Volodja give me examples of a few problems then?

As for me? Well sometimes i have been told i have 'bad' AS and other times people have told me that i am completely normal and it is only very mild.

hte problem withe me is that i do have very bad anxiety issues and do get stressed easily. i also walk like a moron because i am very insecure of my height of 5ft10.


There's nothing wrong with 5ft10 in my opinion - I definitely wouldn't worry about your height if I were you

Sounds like anxiety will be one of your major problems then. I get stressed easily too. Do you have social anxiety? I think that's gotta be one of the biggest problems someone with AS can have. With me I find it really hard to follow conversations with someone I don't know well, so I can't think of what to say next fast enough and end up looking a bit stupid or boring. I guess that doesn't go down well with women :P

Just see how things go - you might find you don't have many problems at all. Depends how lucky you are lol



Jamesy
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13 Jan 2011, 12:47 pm

Well I find when there is less conflict with my family home then i am less stressed and anxious.

i have always been a nervous even as far back as i can remember, in fact i remember at 5 or 6 years old i would get nervous very easily esspecialyl when my grandmother came round to babysit and my parents would go out. i think it was the sepearation from my parents which would make me nervous as a kid.

Even non autistic people worry and have anxiety



MR20
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13 Jan 2011, 1:44 pm

MidlifeAspie wrote:
nick007 wrote:
wefunction wrote:
nick007 wrote:
wefunction wrote:
Experienced and specialized life coaches can cost anywhere from $150 - $600 / month. While that may not be an option right now, it certainly may be something to keep in mind after graduation.

That's expensive. You wouldn't have time to use it because you'd be to busy working to pay for it


Not really. That's a monthly rate, not an hourly rate, and you do get what you pay for.

The people who really could benefit could not afford the services; the SSI maximum is $674 a month. Cant except to get much better than minimum wage if you have really poor life, social & other skills; it's a catch22


I make a helluva lot more than minimum wage. There are Nobel Prize winners with AS. Let's not wallow in self-pity and allow ourselves to fall into a self-fulfilling prophecy of inadequacy.


There are different degrees of aspergers. Another person with AS may not have the same skills and competence as you. There's no hope for a person like me. No girl would want to be seen talking to me in public let alone hanging out and dating.



emlion
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13 Jan 2011, 1:45 pm

you can't speak for all girls.



Sallamandrina
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13 Jan 2011, 1:46 pm

He's right, I doubt any girl would get close to him since he says he only washes himself once every 6 months.


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emlion
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13 Jan 2011, 1:48 pm

Sallamandrina wrote:
He's right, I doubt any girl would get close to him since he says he only washes himself once every 6 months.


Ew. Okay, fair enough then.



wefunction
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13 Jan 2011, 1:48 pm

nick007 wrote:
MidlifeAspie wrote:
nick007 wrote:
MidlifeAspie wrote:
nick007 wrote:
I think we are having a misunderstanding. I did NOT say that was a bad idea & I am NOT against it but I think it should be a free service. The people who cant afford it are likely the ones who need it the most.


Who foots the bill then?

It should be part of a social program that helps people with disabilities including people with AS find & maintain employment. The extra tax money that comes in from having more & better paid workers would cover the cost


Where does the "extra tax money" come from? In order for the taxes to be extra these would have to be jobs that did not exist before. Are you suggesting that new industries be formed that create jobs that are better attuned to an Aspie labor market? What industry would that be? The industry and the jobs would need to come before or at the same time as the program to fill these jobs.

The jobs will not come if their are not people who are trained or capable of doing em.
I'm going to let this drop because this belongs on another section


Perhaps you can form an organization that lobbies for the expansion of a public assistance program that includes accessible mental health care and life coaching. Your idea is one that's worth pursuing and there is a process to be able to accomplish what you've suggested.



Sallamandrina
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13 Jan 2011, 1:52 pm

emlion wrote:
Sallamandrina wrote:
He's right, I doubt any girl would get close to him since he says he only washes himself once every 6 months.


Ew. Okay, fair enough then.


Honestly, I'd take all he says with a pinch of salt :wink:


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emlion
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13 Jan 2011, 1:54 pm

Sallamandrina wrote:
emlion wrote:
Sallamandrina wrote:
He's right, I doubt any girl would get close to him since he says he only washes himself once every 6 months.


Ew. Okay, fair enough then.


Honestly, I'd take all he says with a pinch of salt :wink:


I can't ever really remember reading any of his posts before so I can't really do that yet. :P



wefunction
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13 Jan 2011, 1:57 pm

MR20 wrote:
There are different degrees of aspergers. Another person with AS may not have the same skills and competence as you.


You're right about this. There are more and less functioning aspies. Unfortunately, aspies need to be very careful not to allow themselves to assume they have a lower degree of functioning than they actually do. I know you're having a very difficult time, probably more than you're willing to share on the internet. I can respect that. I do believe that you can have help to improve your life. I realize you are not able to do it all on your own. But someone must be there with you to push you into what needs to be done for yourself. Your job with that help is to listen to that person. I don't know if there's a government program that helps you with that. I know there are outreaches at some churches. It really sounds like you need some good old fashioned christian outreach that can help you without judgment or payment.



MR20
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13 Jan 2011, 2:10 pm

wefunction wrote:
MR20 wrote:
There are different degrees of aspergers. Another person with AS may not have the same skills and competence as you.


You're right about this. There are more and less functioning aspies. Unfortunately, aspies need to be very careful not to allow themselves to assume they have a lower degree of functioning than they actually do. I know you're having a very difficult time, probably more than you're willing to share on the internet. I can respect that. I do believe that you can have help to improve your life. I realize you are not able to do it all on your own. But someone must be there with you to push you into what needs to be done for yourself. Your job with that help is to listen to that person. I don't know if there's a government program that helps you with that. I know there are outreaches at some churches. It really sounds like you need some good old fashioned christian outreach that can help you without judgment or payment.


Why don't you people just understand. There's no hope for a person like me. I stink, I'm poor, I have no friends, I'm ugly, I have 5th grade education, and I'm afraid to be around a large crowd of people. It's too late, I'm a good for nothing bum that's going to be homeless in a few years. No one wants to be around me let alone try to help me. I can see the disdain and disgust in people eyes when they look at me. There is no help for me.



menintights
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13 Jan 2011, 2:29 pm

Stay in the Haven, MR20, stay in the Haven.

You won't get much sympathy here in L&D.



Sallamandrina
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13 Jan 2011, 2:34 pm

^
So I'm not the only one who remembers him? :lol:


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MR20
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13 Jan 2011, 2:43 pm

Sallamandrina wrote:
^
So I'm not the only one who remembers him? :lol:


I remember you. You were mean to me and called me a troll. If you don't me or what I'm saying just skip my posts or put me on ignore.



Sallamandrina
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13 Jan 2011, 2:48 pm

MR20 wrote:
Sallamandrina wrote:
^
So I'm not the only one who remembers him? :lol:


I remember you. You were mean to me and called me a troll. If you don't me or what I'm saying just skip my posts or put me on ignore.


I wasn't mean to you - I merely said that the arguments of the poster accusing you of trolling were solid.

Apologies for derailing the thread - my mistake :oops:


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MidlifeAspie
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13 Jan 2011, 2:49 pm

MR20 wrote:

Why don't you people just understand. There's no hope for a person like me. I stink, I'm poor, I have no friends, I'm ugly, I have 5th grade education, and I'm afraid to be around a large crowd of people. It's too late, I'm a good for nothing bum that's going to be homeless in a few years. No one wants to be around me let alone try to help me. I can see the disdain and disgust in people eyes when they look at me. There is no help for me.


And it might very well be that none of that has to do with AS, but instead are choices that you make since you have AS to blame everything on. You have no idea how high or low functioning I am, all you know is that I am successful so you have to make new excuses for why that may be. Indulging in self-fulfilling prophecies may feel good and may help you excuse yourself from that inner voice who tells you to buck up, get a life and go out there and try - but doing so won't ever actually get you anywhere in this world. The magic "girl-fairy" won't ever drop your soulmate in your lap just because you whined about it enough on a web forum.