pretending to be in a relationship to look more attractive

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would be interesting to get the perspective of a woman that is considered out of most men's league. Those that never end up going on a date because men size them up as never having a chance at all. I would wonder how many male friends they have.

yeah, true. but the men would have to be amenable to it, and presumably would be sticking around for the reasons stated in the article. the dynamic wouldn't change just because the women sought out the men as friends.

Also this from the FB-thread


Anyway, I just thought the relevant part was the blurb about attraction to taken men... Maybe someone else can google what they were saying with that as there was no info

...
These results suggest that men, relative to women, have a particularly hard time being “just friends.” What makes these results particularly interesting is that they were found within particular friendships (remember, each participant was only asked about the specific, platonic, friend with whom they entered the lab). This is not just a bit of confirmation for stereotypes about sex-hungry males and naïve females; it is direct proof that two people can experience the exact same relationship in radically different ways. Men seem to see myriad opportunities for romance in their supposedly platonic opposite-sex friendships. The women in these friendships, however, seem to have a completely different orientation—one that is actually platonic.

(it might be a good idea to take out the name of the person posting on FB because it's their real name, unless it's an author or something.)

yeah, i don't think it is all friendships. i saw the same study in Sci Am Mind:

http://www.scientificamerican.com/artic ... st-friends


you're correct - it's not allll of the friendships, it's only some of them.

I kind of reluctantly admit that I have read a bit of PUA stuff, I mean what guy hasn't perused it? Specifically some of the writings that 'Mystery' put out, and you know his entire philosophy on picking up when revolves 100% around this fact that women are far more attracted to a man who appears taken, or who has multiple women after him. He even has a whole theory around it called 'preselection theory'.

Basically his entire technique is make women believe you are already 'preselected' by other women. Make it seem like you have already had sex with lots of pretty girls, have girls after you. Replicate the personality, body manners, ways of talking, ways of acting of a male who has had sex with hundreds of sexy women. He states that hitting this 'preselection trigger hard-wired in a womens brain' is the single most important thing to attract her.

Actually just here it straight from his mouth: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RfYspQaxPp0

And it's absolutely stupid, but it's absolutely true....

The girls who has showed any interest in me, I managed to hit this preselection trigger in them, they thought I had lots of women after me. In fact, the first, and only girlfriend I had, after about 6 months into the relationship she straight up said "I thought you were the type of guy who would have lots of women after him and I would have to fight them off, but you aren't like that". She said this like it was some big issue, after this sunk into her head things started going downhill, eventually broke up. She was only initially strongly attracted to me because she thought I had lots of women after me, when she realized that wasn't the case, she began to lose interest.

These statistics show that hitting this 'preselection trigger' is actually one of the single most important things to hit.

I think its just really stupid. I think the sexual instincts of women are quite primal, and not based on alot of intelligent thought process. I attribute it to women being much more in a 'herd' mentality.

Due to our roles in ancient tribal cultures, women are not accustomed to being the ones that go out into the unknown wild and hunt for something, hack down new paths. In ancient tribal culture those are tasks men primarily took on. Whereas women had a larger tendency to stay back, deal with domestic aspect of the tribes, making babies, taking care of them, tended to taking care of the village, tending to gardens, they tended to stay in situations where they would be around other women talking. Thus women are inherently far more social, their brain is far more hard-wired to being social. Because of this social validation is the primary mechanism they run on for deducing whats true and correct. This goes over into their sexual instinct. Where sexual lust is created entirely by social validation, by what integrates into the herd more easily.

Which this is all a mechanism that evolved from our tribal social constructs. But in today's world I feel it's kind of stupid. Women don't fully assess a man based on analytical thought process, or looking at what he himself is as an individual. They assess a man based on how other women have assessed the man.

Which can work out well in some cases. But I see this sort of herd mentality in womens sexual attraction making alot of women end up chasing after straight up idiots and losers. I mean for example, bartenders, they tend to get women like crazy, there highly social, I've seen women madly in love with bartenders, fighting over them, spending so much time stressing over them and who they like. I'm just like, he's a damn bartender, come on. Actually the same thing is true for drug dealers, I've never encountered a drug dealer that didn't have a bunch of women after him, because selling drugs gets into social circles, gets lots of women around you, which results in you hitting the preselection trigger in women. I've encountered beautiful, respectable women who are 'madly' in love with some low life sh***y drug dealer and I'm just like how... why???? The guy's an idiot, he sells drugs to make his living, he treats people like sh**, he treats women like sh**, seen him treat his woman like sh**. But all these women are after him, madly in love with him, just because due to his position of being in close cohorts with so many women he hits the 'pre-selection trigger'.

I've actually lost complete respect for some women over this who, I initially respected highly. It's just like, come on, apply some intelligent thought process and perception to this thing. Any moron can stand tall and proud and act like he's f**** alot of women, it doesn't mean sh**. But it does continue to fool the majority of women who have absolutely no capacity of being able to judge the value of a male other than herd mentality. I say that based on evaluating the relationships of the people I know, I can only think of two relationships where the female intelligently, and cognitively, all on her individual self, specifically picked her mate. Everyone else seems to of just ended up where they ended up after going through the cycles of this 'herd mentality' sexual attraction wore them out and they just ended up with what they ended up with.

For a while I bought into Mystery's whole philosophy on hitting the 'pre-selection' trigger, but then I decided I am not going to go around trying to exploit an archaic idiot psychological mechanism in women that simply shouldn't exist. If a women does not have the mental capacity to evaluate me, for me, on her own individual thought process, she can go screw around with whatever male can put on the useless act who will trigger the proper emotions in her through archaic brain circuits.

i value honesty. but i can see how this could work. a person who has had successful relationships carries a bit of a resume/cv... they have references, so to speak. and if a new person even felt like they were poaching from some old flame... it seems like a plan that has merit (though maybe it is a bit unethical). is this crazy?

Jealousy and deception is never a good trait in any relationship or situation, you would be doing yourself and your future partner a dishonour and not building a relationship on a truthful foundation. References or not, most experienced women can tell the level of experience you have when you have sex with them.

sort of. most of my best lovers have been inexperienced or even virgins. they were more openminded to pleasing me, as opposed to assuming what i would like because other women preferred it that way.

i agree that deception isn't a great idea most of the time, and i wouldn't do it myself. but i am open to new ideas that may help others. i think hat few people are in a position where they can condemn others for being dishonest, because they are not 100% honest all of the time either.

do you disclose your diagnosis on dating sites? that seems to be an area nobody can agree on here.

Not only nice guys finish last, but honest guys finish last as well

oh well, I already knew that lying gets you somewhere, if you are good at it.